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As far as I understand it, its basically just like emailing someone without needing their email address. If you were to send a private message to someone, ONLY the person you send it to will be able to read it and/or repsond to it. No one else on the baords would be able to even know the message has been sent. Instead of going to Outlook or whereever you have your email at, you would check the private messages through your profile here on the boards. Moderators, please correct me if I'm wrong but thats how I understand it.
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Taking it one day at a time.....
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Well...
#231775 - 12/15/05 09:22 AM
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epa_ginger
Reged: 02/23/05
Posts: 1158
Loc: Chicago, IL
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I've never done PM here (or anywhere really), but I'd be open to it. There are occasionally times where I wish I could say something privately to someone, but I'd still be really into reading everyone else's posts too.
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I find myself getting stressed this time of year, buying gifts, deciding what my husband should get, because everyone who knows/is related to him asks ME...I find it hard to actually enjoy the season. Not just the religious implications, but the sense of togetherness and peace that we all strive for. I can too easily come up with a snappy, witty yet catty remark these days, and too easily see the negative in what other people say or do. I told myself just last night I'm going to consciously try to be easy going to other people, more understanding than I usually am, more patient (help me!), and give everyone around me the benefit of the doubt. I'm hoping that after purposefully doing this for a while, it will become second nature.
I'm pretty open to everyone's ideas on anything, even stuff that might not be ok for ME (referencing other posts), and if we all didn't have different ideas on things, what would we learn from each other?
Ginger
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And yup that's how I put it!  It's the only thing that I think I would not be able to try to understand.
You have such a beautiful soul Michelle. Pain and sorrow and loss are awful, but they truly can make us into better people. I know for sure that I'm alot more accepting of people and into seeing the good things of any situation now than before I got sick. 
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Googled "private messaging". This is a clear description of it:
Private Messaging
and it sounds like what you're explaining Michele, so I assume it's accurate as well.
The main advantage seems to be that you can essentially "email" someone without knowing their email address. I argued that people who were willing to PM could just put their email address in their profiles instead and achieve the same effect, but my DH pointed out that doing so opened up their email addresses to the whole world, whereas Private Messaging is (should be) available only to registered Board users.
There are some systemic issues, but I figure Heather has considered those.
The main problems with regard to Board viability and users appear to be:
1) People directing "technical" questions to individual Board members. It annoyed the members and detracted from the Board. The individual members who got the PM technical questions sometimes said they just told the questioner (nicely!) to post in the forum so everyone could see the info. That made sure information was shared and I would imagine it also tended to reduce the incidence of that type of PMing.
2) A type of spamming where a user sends Private Messages to multiple individual Board members with the same technical question rather than posting the question on the forum.
I can imagine that the posters who are considered experts might be heavily PMed with technical questions, but they could cope with this by refusing Private Messages; refusing Private Messages from certain users (if that feature is available on this Board); and by declining to deal with the technical questions privately and asking the questioners to post on the Board.
For me, it's irrelevant whether PM is available or not. If it is available, I would decline to use it - my email address is in my profile and I'm fine with hearing from anyone who wants to email me.
So, no more questions for me. Thanks, guys, for trying to explain this to me.
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[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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Honestly, the love and support from this board had truly helped me to see the good in humans! I've only met a very few of you and yet you all cried with me and comforted me in my time(s) of need. In my trying to find acceptance in everything, I often wonder if I have been forced to suffer these challenges and losses to make me a better, more patient, more tolerant person. I always wondered, as I supposed a lot of people probably do, if I have the patience for children and would be I able to raise a child well. After everything I've gone through, I know now that should I ever be blessed with a child in some way, I know that I could raise that child better now than I could have a couple of years ago. That certainly doesn't ease the pain of my losses but its a small step in the process of finding the good in things.
I can also be very quick with a snotty comment or comeback to someone who is less than kind but I'm really trying to just smile and walk away when I feel that urge to be unpleasant. When I feel myself getting too upset or too stressed, I really try to take a moment and think of something good. Whether its the new puppy I'm getting, or the fact that I have a loving husband or that I have so many people who love and care about me.
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Taking it one day at a time.....
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I have a question too and I guess this one would be for Heather....
Will PM'ing increase the cost of running these boards for YOU? Will it use more bandwidth, storage.... etc?
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I voted "No" on whether to reinstitute PM. I said in an earlier post I was indifferent to whether PM was available, but after a lot of thought I've changed my mind.
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[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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Wow, Michele!
#232235 - 12/17/05 08:23 AM
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Bevvy
Reged: 11/04/03
Posts: 5918
Loc: Northwest Washington State
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This is beautiful stuff! I'm impressed. Yeah, you done good!
I was all for PM until I read your post. While I haven't totally changed my mind, this is definitely food for thought.
Well said. You done GOOD, Girl!
Bevvy
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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BINGO!
#232237 - 12/17/05 08:34 AM
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Bevvy
Reged: 11/04/03
Posts: 5918
Loc: Northwest Washington State
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Quote:
In my trying to find acceptance in everything, I often wonder if I have been forced to suffer these challenges and losses to make me a better, more patient, more tolerant person. I always wondered, as I supposed a lot of people probably do, if I have the patience for children and would be I able to raise a child well. After everything I've gone through, I know now that should I ever be blessed with a child in some way, I know that I could raise that child better now than I could have a couple of years ago.
Michele, so many MANY times I've asked myself why God chose to make me sterile -- me, who adores children and would have made an excellent mother. I had a horrible mother who obviously did not want me, which made me want to do so much better when I became a mom. Unfortunately, God had other plans for me. I still don't know what those plans are, but I know that my pain over my sterility has made me a much stronger person than I ever thought I could be. It's something I have had to accept without question. I mean, you hear all the time of mothers who drown their children, throw them off bridges or leave them in trash bags in airplane bathrooms. Why them? Why not give ME a chance? I'll never know the answer, of course, but it's made me much more patient and tolerant -- YOUR very words. Yes, I think you hit the nail on the head, Girlfriend!
You're doing wonderfully, Michele, an inspiration to us all.
{{{{Hugs}}}}
Bevvy
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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