Where are Ruchie, Terri, Gigi, Bevrs? So many "regulars" have disappeared!--nt-
#186666 - 06/16/05 10:13 AM
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BL
Reged: 06/01/03
Posts: 3522
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--------------------
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hey I'm here, sort of.
Going through a very tough time with family stuff combined with work and wedding so haven't been posting a whole lot but I am here, promise!
Like my new pic?? Anyone got any news to share that I may have missed?
-------------------- S.
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-------------------- God is Faithful!
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Yes, cute new pic!
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She's been having flashbacks to her abuse and has been struggling to even get out of the flat. Hope she feels better soon, I miss her.
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-------------------- Formerly HanSolo. IBS, OCD, Bipolar, PTSD times 3.
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I am sorry I haven't been on the boards.
Alicia/Han is right...I have been on religious holidays. ANOTHER ONE begins again tomorrow night to Sat. night so I have been cleaning/cooking this week. Plus I've been having GERD so bad it has been waking me in the middle of the night. VERY painful I must say!
Linz is also correct. I am having flashbacks. Hubby and I were at the dog park TOGETHER and I still felt so unsafe as I had a flashback there. I had to go sit in the car and cry while hubby played with Shana.
I just don't have the energy right now to respond. I am achey, tired, hurting, and emotionally worn out!
i know it will not be forever. The abuse was from age pre-birth (mother's expectations which led to emotional abuse and anorexia), to age 26. I am now 26.5 and it is OVER! I will not allow anyone to abuse me emotionally or otherwise EVER AGAIN!
In the meantime...my life was a series of negative experiences...or victimizations. I need to heal from this. The best part is...it's OVER and it is in the PAST.
One day I will be able to leave my apartment. I will be able to do all the things a young woman my age enjoys. Until then...life is a battle. A struggle.
But I know it is for a purpose. This is my belief. I did NOT deserve it. But I will rise above it. I will climb higher and higher...until I reach the top.
Please continue to pray for me. If I don't respond...send an e-mail...it is NOT personal. I am simply too tired across the board.
Sending everyone love, serenity, safety, joy, gratitude, more love, and light!
Ruchie
-------------------- Formerly known as Ruchie
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Rache...
#186831 - 06/17/05 12:13 AM
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Linz
Reged: 09/01/03
Posts: 8242
Loc: England
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...are you on meds for the GERDs atm? My doc's given me Omeprazole as it's cheaper than what I was on (oy! ) and I don't think it's working so well.
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-------------------- God is Faithful!
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I send "spider hugs." What's a spider hug? Well, I just don't have enough arms to give you the kind of hug that you need, so just image that I'm a human spider! Seriously, flashbacks are freaky. What can I say other than BREATHE and get yourself "grounded." Visualize yourself growing roots deep into the earth and say to yourself "that was then and this is now." Affirm your lovability and safety verbally and in writing even. I hope you learn to meditate and use creative visualization to assist you in healing.
Have a happy holiday. I send you best wishes in creating a psycho-spiritual terra wherein you feel SAFE and present and wholly holy whole and lovable and capable of just feeling good. Maybe do a little brainstorming re: things/images/phrases/sights/sounds that make you feel safe inside of yourself and the world? Honestly, breathing exercises really help alter the frequency/vibration of your consciousness.
Sorry about the GERDS. Can you take some meds. for it? Do some diet modification, i.e. avoid GERDS triggers, etc.?
Until later, enjoy the holiday and time with hubby. Give the fear to God to "recycle" or "compost." (metaphorically speaking)
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working like crazya nd not on the PC at home hardly at all...
-------------------- Dietetics Student (anticipating RD exam in Aug 2010)
IBS - A
Dairy Allergic
Fructose and MSG intollerant
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