I got fired as bridesmaid!
#136968 - 01/10/05 02:42 PM
|
|
|
|
|
cailin
Reged: 08/12/04
Posts: 3563
Loc: Dublin, Ireland
|
|
|
Met my friend for dinner today, her treat to cheer me up after my family troubles.
After dinner we went for a drink, started to chat and she relieved me of my duties of being her bridesmaid for her wedding in October. She asked me and two other girls in February 2003 and today she said that she didn't think it was fair to me to ask me to be her bridesmaid when I have so much going on ....like my family problems and my IBS. She didn't want to put pressure on me with all this going on and she didn't want to get mad with me if my tummy wasn't well when I had a fitting etc or I had family stuff going on. I mean there are three bridesmaids, how onerous a task was it going to be.
I got really upset and cried in the pub, I felt like she was saying that I was disabled or inadequate and it was horrible.
I told her that I have been happier and more together in the last three months as I can ever remember, I really felt like she was telling me that I was a mess and all over the shop. I was really mad at her for using my weakest spots as the reasons, felt like she was kicking me when I was down. This is normal for me and just because she doesn't have my problems she doesn't understand this.
Anyway, she said she'd feel stressed feeling that she was making me stressed....are you following? Anyway I left it that it was going to stress her to have me as bridesmaid I would step down, so we agreed I would do that.
I am so hurt, I have made strides in controlling my IBS and really try not to let family issues (that have been with me 15years) affect my life and to have that thrown back at me was just awful.
I don't know how I am going to face going to her wedding now, anytime she looks at me I am going to see pity in her eyes.
PLEASE SEND HUGS ASAP 
--------------------
S.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
That's terrible. I'm so sorry your friend was so unable to think about your side of things. Sometimes being a bride brings out the worst in people.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
I'm so sorry! Big HUGS to you! Do you think maybe she might come around and realize that she was wrong in relieving you of your duties??
--------------------
~ Rachel (IBS-C)
If life hands you lemons, make lemonade!!
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
You know in a sense this is a good thing. She will definitely turn into the bride from hell and she is really a perfectionist too.
I am just hurt by her approach and reasons. BF is trying to come up with ideas for me to skip the wedding but that would not be a great plan, even though it will be so hard to watch my replacement there.
--------------------
S.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{MASSIVE HUGS!!!!!!!!!!}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Sinead, that is so not fair!!! She obviously does not get it!! How self-centered!! Give me her address and I'll go to that wedding and bash up all her gifts. Not break them, just put a dent in each and every one of them.
~nelly~
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Thanks Nel, I knew I could count on you. Could you maybe come early and spit in the food at the reception too?
I am not vindictive and as I said I know it will make my life a lot easier not having to do this but it was pretty hard to be told that I am not together enough to be a candidate, I mean we haven't spent any time together in AGES. I think its just that we've grown apart.
My nasty mother thinks its because I will look so much better than her in pics now that I have lost weight, she is overweight..what is she like? The bride is stunning but has pudge, trust Mam to be supportive in a MEAN way!
--------------------
S.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Maybe she's not that great of a friend to have then!
Her loss as you seem like such a lovely person! 
She obviously doesn't know you enough to know that you're perfectly capable of being a bridesmaid. DUH!  
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Ugh, don't you hate it when people try to be supportive and end up offending and upsetting you?? I hate that. Mind numbing violence, I say. And I'll "take care" of the food. 
~nelly~ I can also sprinkle spiders down the aisle too, if you want.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Now that you are looking for a new job, have you ever thought about being a stand up comedian!! Seriously,you absolutely crack me up!
You could even make having to leave the stage to go visit the bathroom part of the act (if need be)!
--------------------
~ Beth
Constipation, pain prodominent,cramps, spasms and bloat!
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
LOL! Thank you for the compliment!!!!! I don't know if I could handle the stress of stand up tho! But I would have a lot of material, if they allowed potty humor... I don't know if people could stomach stand up on IBS, tho! And I'm much funnier when I have a captive audience like you guys. Maybe once I go to prison I can hone my craft there.
~nelly~
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
Posts
