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Isn't it annoying when you trust a friend enough to tell her what's going on in your life and then she treats it like a sign of weakness!
She should know that you would be one of the strongest and most dependable people to have around her on her wedding day just because you already have to cope with so many things. Don't let it get to you, Sinead - it's her loss, not yours.
Sending you hugs!
Josephine
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Thanks SS, I strongly believe I would be a great bridesmaid. The things she was saying sounded like they were describing someone else not me!
Nelly, you always cheer me up thanks, I need a laugh...but captive audience....GROAN!
Everyone who replied, thanks for the support and nice things ...everyone else ...keep it coming!
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S.
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You silly gal!  That's why we love ya! 
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Who needs her! She should be way more considerate of your feelings though.
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Yes, yes. Captive audience. Thank you very much everybody! I'm here all week! Tip your waitresses..!
~nelly~
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Sinead,
Going out on a limb here, but do you think there may be some possibility that she really is concerned for you and your well being?
Just thought I'd ask because I cannot believe someone could be that cruel to you, especially causing you to cry and not getting a clue as to how much more stress it was causing you to be treated so insensitively.
I think you hit on a key point when you said she was a perfectionist. She is trying to eliminate any possible problems in her own mind. What, is she thinking you are gonna have to run down the aisle in the middle of the ceremony to visit the bathroom? Give me a break! Sounds like she is simply a spoiled self centered person who wants everything to focus on her I guess. Like Tina said, she obviously isn't the friend you thought she was, which is also very hurtful to you now.
I don't think you need an excuse not to go to the wedding. She gave you a very good reason not to go. I don't think I could go and watch someone else take my place.
I had to go to my nieces baptism and watch my sister's friend stand in as the Godmother and to this day it upsets me when I hear my neice refer to this other person as her Godmother instead of me. It hurts to feel rejected and so easily replaced.
And it makes me mad that she did this under the ruse of taking you out to cheer you up when what she fully had in mind was to lay all this on you instead!
I'm so sorry you were hurt by her insensitivity. And I know it probably doesn't lessen the hurt by saying "she's the one who's losing out" more than you. But that's the truth.
You are a nice person and she truly is losing out by not having you as part of her day.
Big hugs to you. Sorry you had this happen after such a nice day you shared with us a couple days ago 
The world is just full of insensitive people 
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~ Beth
Constipation, pain prodominent,cramps, spasms and bloat!
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That sucks!! I got fired as a maid of honour a couple years ago (although my friend turned into a major bridezilla and finally snapped out of it and re-hired me!!).
Do you really want to be a bridesmaid? It sounds like you do. If that's the case then maybe you could talk to her and tell her how important it is for you to be a part of everything.
You're in a tough situation. *HUGS*
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I can't believe it! Big hugs from me!!!!!!! I've had some similar things happen where family ask something of me then change their mind and blame it on my IBS. It's so hurtful. Just because we get sick a lot doesn't mean we're incapable of living and being there for them!
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Amy
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I am sorry. That seems so catty and girlish to do that. She doesn't seem very mature. You know what though, being a bridesmaid is not as fun as you think it will be. There is the cost and hosting a shower and all the whining the bride does and the whole day becomes so stressful. It was one of my best decisions to not be in my sister's wedding last fall. And I got D really bad at the wedding even without being in it. Yet I was fine last year as a bridesmaid- no D just bloat. So maybe you will get an opportunity to be in a wedding that is calmer and friendlier and for someone really sweet and the serenity and happiness will make your tummy and everything happy too. (do you follow? I mean cuz at my sis's wedding it was crazy and I got sick and at the other I was happy and fine  ) Hugs!
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IBS-A for 20 years with terrible bloating and gas. On the diet since April 2004. Remember this from Heather's information pages:
"You absolutely must eat insoluble fiber foods, and as much as safely possible, but within the IBS dietary guidelines. Treat insoluble fiber foods with suitable caution, and you'll be able to enjoy a wide variety of them, in very healthy quantities, without problem." Please eat IF foods!
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Well, now I've heard it all. Nelly, if you need any help bashing presents, let me know.
Sinead, I just think that was so insensitive and cruel of your friend. I just don't get it!!!!!!
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