Pity party time
#136879 - 01/10/05 11:21 AM
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atomic rose
Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)
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Forgive me for whining... I just need to b*tch, and Adam's gotta be tired of hearing about some of this stuff by now. 
I feel miserable. I'm not even remotely stable right now. I'm not doing ANYTHING different from what I was doing a few months ago, so I have NO idea why I'm suddenly back to having D every morning, and then spending the rest of the day so nauseated that I can hardly do anything. On top of that, I'm ALWAYS exhausted and achy and my sinuses are driving me crazy. I'm not sick; I've been like this for weeks, never any worse, but never any better, either.
I had my first-ever *conscious* PTSD-related incident a couple days ago. Something I was watching on TV triggered me - I've never recognized those triggers before, so I guess I should be glad that I did, so I can avoid it in the future, but in the meantime, I haven't slept well since, because of the nightmares.
And money... ugh, nevermind, I don't even want to go there.
I've never felt so isolated and alone in my life.
I've been trying to reply to posts here and there, but I'm sorry if I've missed anything major - I read everything, and you've all been in my thoughts, whether I've replied to you specifically or not. Things are really rough here. I've just been physically and mentally miserable since 2005 started, and it's driving me nuts.
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Sorry to hear you've been feeling so bad.  This may be an off the wall question - but do you think you could be pregnant? If not, maybe you should go see your doctor. Especially if nothing has changed and you're still feeling icky.
As for Adam, I'm sure he just feels bad that you don't feel well. Hope you're taking it easy with your knitting and try not to worry too much about money (yeah like that's possible, right? know how that goes..).
Big hugs!
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- Jennifer
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Oh Casey!
#136893 - 01/10/05 11:39 AM
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RachelT
Reged: 07/01/04
Posts: 2350
Loc: Minnesota
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I'm so sorry. I'm totally at a loss for what to say... I just hope this bad streak ends, SOON! You were doing so good! I hope it wasn't from eating Indian food... if so, than that's my fault and I'm even more sorry! Poor you! Big hugs sweetie!
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~ Rachel (IBS-C)
If life hands you lemons, make lemonade!!
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Nooooo....
#136894 - 01/10/05 11:39 AM
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atomic rose
Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)
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Definitely not pregnant, and no chance of it, thank goodness.
Unfortunately, I can't go see my doctor right now. I still haven't found a new doctor since I've moved, and my old one is 80 miles away. If I'm still feeling crappy in a few days, maybe I'll try the ER or something, although I'd feel like a real dork doing it.
I will take it easy, though... thank you. 
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LOL!
#136895 - 01/10/05 11:42 AM
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atomic rose
Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)
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*big hugs* right back... I REALLY doubt it was the Indian food, LOL! I was still fine, really, right through New Year's. After that, it seems like my body fell apart.
Hmm... maybe it's *lack* of Indian food? Heh.
Hope you're doing good, sweetie!
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Casey, I was going to post something asking you how you've been as I hadn't seen any posts from you in a while.
I'm sorry to hear that you're not doing well again. I think feeling great, and then going back to feeling lousy has got to be one of the cruelest jokes.
Could it be you need a higher dose of your anti-depressant? Remember that food isn't the only IBS trigger. Have you been stressing a lot because of money Or anything?
Could you have a bug in your system? Colds and viruses affect IBS a lot. Have you thought about going to your doc for a check up to make sure you're not anemic or anything like that?
I don't know if this is of any help, but you were pretty stable for quite some time and it will happen again.
You can lean on us as much as you need to.
Big hugs, sweetie.  
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Casey,
Okay, I'm at work and should not even be on this computer since my manager is very hovering today. But heck, when a friend is in trouble, priorities need to be made!
Just want to say, don't ever apologize for whining as you call it, on this board. You have always posted such helpful advice and encouraging words for all of us. Do you think you are superwoman? You can't be there for everyone all the time, and more importantly, no one expects you to be.
As far as feeling isolated and alone, you know that is the same exact way I am feeling. That is the one positive thing about going to work. At least it gets me out amongst people and out of the house. I think about you all alone all day and that has to be hard, as much as you love quiet and knitting! It is a lot of time to think about "stuff" and ruminate on problems:money, health, past traumas, etc.
I am so glad you decided to share this with us so that we can offer you the support you need.
And I agree, 2005 has been a stinker.
And thank you for your thoughts. Please don't feel like you need to respond to the posts if you aren't feeling up to it. Sometimes you just need to take a break, when you are feeling empty yourself. So let us give something to you now. Okay?
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~ Beth
Constipation, pain prodominent,cramps, spasms and bloat!
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Casey, you might want to consider some of these possibilities also.
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~ Beth
Constipation, pain prodominent,cramps, spasms and bloat!
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I'm so sorry Casey! I hope this is just a setback and you will get right back on track.
I am all screwed up too...I was C for almost 10 days and the past 2 days have been awful with pains. I just keep telling myself that this will pass....
I know what you mean about not wanting to always complain to Adam. I hardly ever tell Justin anymore when I feel sick, because I always feel like a burden
Feel better! <<HUGS>>>
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~Cara~
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Awwww!
#136917 - 01/10/05 01:20 PM
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Sheri01
Reged: 04/19/04
Posts: 1731
Loc: New Jersey
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Casey it sucks that you are not doing so well. Your tummy will stabilize again, that is kinda odd it came out of nowhere, but if you are stressed out maybe that is causing it?
Don't even stress about keeping up on posts, just a word here or there to let us know you are alive is enough!
Make sure you get lots of stress, and I hope the PTSD lets up alittle too.
No need to feel lonely and isolated! I am sure that we all feel it at times, I know I have had my fair share.
Sending happy thoughts your way!
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-Sheri
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so I wont' repeat them, but I think we're all thinking along the same lines.. especially since the flu gave dh the runs and he doesn't even have IBS...
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Dietetics Student (anticipating RD exam in Aug 2010)
IBS - A
Dairy Allergic
Fructose and MSG intollerant
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That sucks!!! Isn't it so frustrating when you were feeling so much better and now you've had a set back....can you think of anything you might have changed in your diet, daily routine, etc.? Have there been any new stresses lately?
I'm sure you'll start feeling better again soon....we just need to figure out what went wrong and then fix you up again!! *HUGS* Keep us updated on how you're feeling.
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Quote:
Forgive me for whining... I just need to b*tch, and Adam's gotta be tired of hearing about some of this stuff by now. no need to be sorry...we are here for ya
I feel miserable. I'm not even remotely stable right now. I'm not doing ANYTHING different from what I was doing a few months ago, so I have NO idea why I'm suddenly back to having D every morning, and then spending the rest of the day so nauseated that I can hardly do anything. On top of that, I'm ALWAYS exhausted and achy and my sinuses are driving me crazy. I'm not sick; I've been like this for weeks, never any worse, but never any better, either. Has there been a big weather change...I've read that is can make a difference.
I had my first-ever *conscious* PTSD-related incident a couple days ago. Something I was watching on TV triggered me - I've never recognized those triggers before, so I guess I should be glad that I did, so I can avoid it in the future, but in the meantime, I haven't slept well since, because of the nightmares. Oh honey, I can totally relate to those.... email me if you ever need/want to.
And money... ugh, nevermind, I don't even want to go there.
I've never felt so isolated and alone in my life. your not alone sweetie....
I've been trying to reply to posts here and there, but I'm sorry if I've missed anything major - I read everything, and you've all been in my thoughts, whether I've replied to you specifically or not. Things are really rough here. I've just been physically and mentally miserable since 2005 started, and it's driving me nuts. Things will get better... expressing your feelings is a great step and can be very healing.... express away!!
**HUGS**
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www.facebook.com/shell.marr
www.myspace.com/shellmarr
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Aww, Casey. I'm so sorry to hear about your troubles. It's always so disappointing when we have setbacks with our ibs. It happens to us all (except LauraSue; that little smarty pants!)
It sounds like you're really on overload right now. I'm hoping that all will be well very soon. You know that this isn't going to last forever.
We have money problems ALL the time, so I can sure sympathize with you on that one. My husband is disabled and our meager income definitely doesn't keep up with our living expenses; nothing extravagant, just living day to day.
I never get tired of hearing anybody's problems on this board. Afterall, it does seem like we are all plagued with a constant off and on stream of troubles. Everybody here fully understands how you feel.
Big hugs to you,
Terri
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Oh Casey that is just awful, you had been on such a winning streak.
I know the lonely feeling, we IBSers have to be extra careful to try not to let things get on top of us or the tummy spiral begins too and we are completely miserable.
Here's to you getting better soon, look out your window and see the good things the new year has to offer, hopefully your feelings can be put down to January blues...
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S.
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Really sorry to hear you have been having such a rough time lately. You have been so much help to so many people on this board, there'll be a lot of good thoughts coming your way now. I hope you work out what you need very soon, until then take care.
Josephine
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Hey.. everybody has already said some good stuff.. BUT I'll just say I hope you feel better.
Are you doing cognitive behavioral therapy at all to help with the PTSD.. its does wonders in reprogramming negative images/events etc (haha there is my psychobabble for the day)
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I'm so sorry you're having a rough time. It always seems like a bad omen when you start the year off sick doesn't it? I can certainly sympathise. Nothing seems to be helping me and I can understand the constant tiredness and d every day. It all feels too much sometimes. Not sure what PTSD is but I know that when I'm feeling sick I have nightmares all the time which in turn makes me exhausted the next day. I really hope you start to feel stable again soon and feel free to whinge any time. We're all here and we all understand. Big hugs to you.
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Amy
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Ohhhh, Casey. I'm so sorry you're going through a difficult time. Things will get better, I promise! At least that's what I keep telling myself. 2005 has not started off good for me either. I've been having back spasms that wake me up in the middle of the night.
Sometimes when everything seems to go wrong all at once, you feel like your world is crashing in on you. I know this must be how you feel. Hang in there! We can get through this year together. You are a strong person ---and have always been so supportive and encouraging for me. I will put you on my prayer list too! (I have a long list!!!)
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Casey,
The exhausted all the time, achey all the time and sinuses sound alot like me and I have Fibro. I hope you don't but just something to think about talking to the doc about. When I become extremely tired the Fibro flares up and even if I have not changed anything in my daily habits or diet except lack of sleep the IBS comes roaring into the foreground. The lack of sleep triggers the Fibro and IBS is a symptom that comes w/ Fibro (all though not all IBSers have Fibro) and so the Fibro sets off the IBS. Or you could just be plain all tired and your body is just complaining right now.
I hope you feel better,
Christie
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Christie
~Hoping and Praying for Sleep!~
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That is terrible to hear! You take as much time to whine here as needed. I hope it is just temporary! Hugs 
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IBS-A for 20 years with terrible bloating and gas. On the diet since April 2004. Remember this from Heather's information pages:
"You absolutely must eat insoluble fiber foods, and as much as safely possible, but within the IBS dietary guidelines. Treat insoluble fiber foods with suitable caution, and you'll be able to enjoy a wide variety of them, in very healthy quantities, without problem." Please eat IF foods!
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Aww sorry to hear you're not doing so well. I too have had unexplainable bad IBS lately too. It's so weird and I'm back to eating the blandest stuff ever! I hope you start feeling better soon though. Try and just take it easy and relax and hope you're tummy will take a hint. The naseau thing is the worse because I get that too and it's just such a debilitating feeling. Maybe this will be a good time to practice those new knitting techniques. Hope you're doing better REALLY REALLY SOON! Big hugs!
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Feel better soon!!
#137096 - 01/10/05 11:27 PM
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Angie113
Reged: 12/31/04
Posts: 297
Loc: Alternate b/w Northern and Southern California
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so sorry you're not feeling well! everyone is right, you should NEVER feel guilty about whining here, that's why we're here, right?? I also know what you mean about too much complaining to the BF, I feel like I all I do is whine to mine. It's hard when you can't pinpoint a cause for feeling bad, but it happens. I hope it passes!!
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~Angela
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Just echoing everyone else's thoughts! I am sorry you feel so rotten! Don't ever worry about venting! How's the weather there? If it is cold and snowy I know that can lead to kind of a winter depression. Anyways hope you are feeling better.
Lots of Love!
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First of all, thanks for all the encouraging and sweet words and thoughts and whatnot. I'm feeling a little better today... I think you guys cheered me up pretty good. 
Tissy/Christie - It's funny that you mentioned the fibro. It's one of those things where I've been wondering for the past few months if I should ask my doctor about it, but I don't have the painful spots that are usually used as part of the diagnosis. Plus I feel really weird mentioning it in the first place, because I've had doctors yell at me before for "self-diagnosing". But it might be worth asking about. It doesn't seem to matter how much sleep I get, the fatigue and achiness is always there, and it just seems to be getting worse.
doubletrouble/Amy - PTSD is post-traumatic stress disorder, a severe anxiety sort of disorder that happens as a result of a traumatic event in a person's life. It doesn't *always* happen when a person has trauma, mind you, but I'm lucky and it happened to me. In my case, it was a severely abusive marriage. I've had it for probably 10 years now, and I was finally diagnosed last summer, but this was the first time that I ever had something visual consciously trigger a flashback. It was really disturbing.
Kimm, Sheri, and everyone else who mentioned stress as a possible trigger - I haven't had any new stress in my life lately. In fact, with the holidays over, I'd say my life is LESS stressful now than it was! I don't get it.
Cara - Sorry to hear you've been having trouble too! Sheesh, what IS it lately, anyway?! Hope you're feeling better!
Beth - What do you mean, I'm not Superwoman?!?!?! Haha. As for being alone... hmm, it's hard to explain. I guess I should start by saying that I'm really not physically alone all the time - I know a lot of people around town now, and I get out when I want to get out. And 99% of the time, I'm really very content to be by myself anyway. Going out and being around people at work every day used to drive me bananas - I love doing my own thing from home. I think I was just getting whiny because I've lost touch with a lot of friends of mine over the past year, and it's always their doing... and that hurts a little.
PS - Don't get yourself in trouble at work, ok? LOL
Tina - I could very well need a higher dose of lexapro. I will ask my doctor about that.
Everyone else, just sincere thanks. Sometimes just knowing that people understand is the biggest help!
Hope everyone's doing good today!
*hugs all around*
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Casey, I'll come to your pity party! It sounds like you could use any kind of party right now. I'm sorry to hear about everything you're going through right now. I agree, it's super frustrating when your IBS flares up without any obvious reason... even more frustrating than when you know what caused it! I just hope things calm down for you soon. I know it usually takes a while. Feel free to vent here wheneever you need to!
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"Anyone can exercise, but this kind of lethargy takes real discipline." -Garfield
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I hope you're feeling a tad better today.
I hope you don't have fibro, Casey. It sounds like it's a quite a bit of work. Please do get checked out as I hear it can get worse if untreated.
Anyhow, take good care of yourself and get Adam to give you a big hug!
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