DEPRESSED......I NEED TO GAIN WEIGHT.
#311691 - 07/20/07 08:07 PM
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I know I'm not the only person with IBS that has this problem. I just recently got stable with my IBS, but I had already lost so much weight before I knew what was going on. I had gotten afraid to eat because it seemed like whatever I put in my mouth would put me in writhing stomach and intestinal pain. I'm eating a good diet now, but I'm continuing to lose weight. I was 118 and am now 102, and I'm 5'6". My size 0 clothes are falling off of me. It is really hard to whine about this to normal people, because they think I'm being ridiculous, but I feel ugly. My skin looks like it is hanging off my bones and I'm afraid to exercise too much for fear I will just lose more weight. My friends and family look at me like I must be a druggy or have an eating disorder. I'm just getting really depressed. 
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Hi
i'm completely unqualified to give suggestions or advice about weight gain since I am forever struggling with the opposite, but if you are feeling strong enough to handle exercise, perhaps yoga would help your body function better, and assimilate nutrition better, and some weight bearing exercise would give you some muscle tone and weight. It really helps with depression and self-image as well. I hope you have some good quality vitamins.
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Hi on another thread I posted about weight gain. I had to gain a huge amount and felt often very sick and in pain but had to do it. Food is medicine and can really help with depression,pain,sickness. Its so hard in the short run but in the long run can give you a better life. I really think a nutritionist because I would of never been able to eat the amount I needed and they can help establish a taylored plan and also with the mental. Take care.
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Ok, my tip is that you try to eat frequently. Try to get some protein with every meal and snack if you can. One thing that is good to add some energy to your diet is to try to drink good energy containing beverages instead of water, like soy or oat milk for example.
If you want to exercise then take it easy, maybe combine walking with some weight training. Of course this means you must get some extra energy from your diet since increased muscle weight means that you burn off more energy too.
I can relate to how you feel. I have not been as much underweight as you are. I was down to 107 pounds last Xmas and am 5'5. But since then I have been able to gain about 2 pounds. Though I have to admit I haven't been very strict with my diet lately - what I mean by that is that when I decided I needed to do something to put on weight I was really careful to not eat things like a sandwich lunch but rather leftovers from the previous night's dinner. Now I've eaten less cooked food again, so maybe that's why I haven't put more weight on.
A good way to get energy is to drink smoothies. This is also a safe way to incorporate fruit and berries and nuts for example. Your imagination is really the limit here.  Try mixing a banana and some berries or other type of fruit, with some rice-, oat-, or soymilk, some honey if you can tolerate it, a few nuts of your choice (make sure they are finely chopped in the mixer) and maybe even some soy protein powder for example. Really delicious and nutritious!
/Ulrika, IBS-D
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Thanks everyone so much. I do eat frequently and I always have snacks at work and at home, but I am thinking I need to find ways to add some calories to what I'm eating as well. A nutritionist sounds like a great idea to help there. I do yoga and pilates, but not as frequently as I should. I have a full time job, 2 dogs, a house, and I'm single, so all that and cooking meals can get to be a little time consuming. And I'm running out of energy. I'm hoping by really concentrating on gaining weight I'll get more energy and then not feel so overwhelmed. Thanks for everyone's support.
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Hi Laura,
I was looking through older posts for info on gaining weight. I too have lost alot of weight and am looking for tips on putting it back on safely. I have to be careful not to consume too much bread/carbs etc or I get stopped up....have you had any luck gaining? If so, what did you do?
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I wish I had some good news. I also wish some of the advice I got from others helped, but nothing has. I still weigh somewhere between 98 and 101 pounds. I've never been heavy, but always used to weight around 120. I'm 5'6" and a 20 lb loss is pretty significant for me. The thing I think that keeps me from losing more weight is that when I'm hungry, I eat. Period. I no longer worry if it is between meals, at meal time, or even 11:00 pm. I know in my heart it is the lack of fat in my diet. I ocassionally eat a hamburger (96% lean), and I have been eating some goat cheese (seems to be a lot easier to digest), and every morning I have oatmeal with Acacia fiber (helps to keep me from getting stopped up).
Anyway, good luck. If you do find anything that works, let me know. I'm still struggling.
Laura
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I've been where you are! I'm also 5'6" and a year and a half ago I was down to 104 pounds and felt like I was dying. I felt horrible and gross and weak. Now I'm 120 pounds and I've been at that weight for six months now -- and I'm really happy body-wise. I get extra calories in by eating the safe quick breads and smoothies listed on the site. Luna Bars have also been a great snack for me -- easy on my gut and an extra 180 calories. I've been able to maintain a healthy weight without having to eat things that aggravate my IBS (no dairy, no red meat, no high fat foods). Fortunately, I've never been anemic or malnourished.
However, I should point out that in addition to IBS, I found out that I had lupus and being in a flare was causing me to lose weight. If you feel that you're eating well and getting enough calories in but still losing weight, you should see a doctor -- just to make sure everything is okay.
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Hi Laura,
I dont know how much help I will be but I will give it a shot. I have always been tiny and super athletic, working out around 6 times a week. I am 5' 1 but was always consitant around 98 lbs. I dropped to about 90 without even knowing it and it kind of freaked me out. I could see my bones and it was honestly gross, or at least in my eyes it was. In the begining of october I decided that i was going to try to put on weight healthly. I am happy to say that I have put on about 5 lbs. I am consitently putting on almost 1 lb a week. What I have been doing is this. Working out 6 days a week...3 days only about 15 minutes cardio and more weight lifting (builds muscle, and weighs more) and then 3 days a week longer cardio but still light lifting. I eat 5-6 times a day and have increased my portions. I eat 2-3 snacks plus 3 meals a day. I am IBS C, but by eating a little more it is helping me to go to the bathroom more consistenly and fully. My IBS is becoming more and more stable which is making it easier for me to eat a little more and add more of a variety to my diet. I am even begining to eat out a little, where I went about 6 months without eating out at all. I think not stressing about it is key. I know what needs to be done and I am doing it, not worrying helps. I am not sure if this helps you at all, but I want you to know that it is possible to gain the weight. If you want to talk more or go over daily food I would be more than happy to.
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Abby-IBS-C, Lactose Intolerant, fructose sensitive
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Thanks for responding, I'll let you know if I have any luck. The burger sounds good but I'm too afraid to try it...I do eat oatmeal everyday and snack alot in between meals but snacks of pretzels and carrots don't do much for weight gain. I also know it is because of the lack of fat in my diet as well!
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Would you mind giving me an idea of what you eat? If it helps, I'm IBS-D. Thank you!
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Interesting...I have had my version of this weight loss...not as pronounced but not good either. What I did that helped me is walking, bicycling and weights. I also found that my tolerance for problem foods improved and my appetite increased.
Another thing... Just take it easy and worrying about it only makes it worse.
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Breakfast: Oatmeal plus 2 pieces of toast with either Toffuti, or Peanut Butter (i use better n' peanut butter, its low in fat and sodium. You can buy it at the health food store) Or I eat Cereal with Almond Milk, Bagels with Toffuti, Egg whites, home made bread
Lunch: Turkey/chicken sandwich, soup and rice, tuna sandwich, wraps, crackers with rice cheese or peanut butter. Pretzels, home made bread/muffins, cinnamon pita chips, Polenta.
Always an afternoon snack
Dinner: Chicken, Turkey, Potato, Rice, Pasta, Veggies (mushrooms, spinach, olives, tomoato, carrots, green beans) I can eat baked beans on occasion, Sushi, bread, Fish, toffu dishes. For dinner I make many of the dishes off of the site: Meatloaf, turkey burgers, the amazing macaroni and cheese!!! I make my own pizza using rice cheese, turkey peperoni and veggies. Supper yummy!
If you go to a health food store they carry lots of products that are dairy free and are healthy for IBS. They have serveral brownie or cookie mixes that you can add eggs of almond milk to it.
By eating food that are safe for my stomach it is helping me to eat a little more and also fully go to the bathroom.
Do you live close to a health food or organic store?
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Abby-IBS-C, Lactose Intolerant, fructose sensitive
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Thank you for your help. My diet is similar to yours (but I can't do tofu). We have a Whole Foods Co-Op nearby and they carry alot of safe alternative's to dairy there. With the exception of using Rice Dream in my oatmeal - I haven't had the nerve to try rice or soy cheese yet, is it really good? Cheese is one of the things I miss the most! I guess I'll have to break down and give it a try. I also have taken alot of recipes off the the boards, those really are a life-saver!!
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Actually I love rice cheese. I buy the shredded mottzarella and use it ALL the time. I make mac and cheese and lasagna for my friends and family and they have no idea its made from rice!!! I make my own pizza and it tastes great! I also buy american and mottz sliced rice cheese to put on sandwiches, bagels or make cheese crakers. I can eat tofu but not too much soy, so I stay away from the soy milk, but I really enjoy the origninal almond milk. I also eat 1/2 of a luna bar each morning when I wake up. They have a lot of great flavors. I hope I have been somewhat helpful. Are you more stable with your IBS? Have you been able to put on any weight? I have to say that I just feel so much better and healthier putting on a little weight.
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Abby-IBS-C, Lactose Intolerant, fructose sensitive
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I'm starting to stablize...haven't had a D attack in almost 3 weeks! Just bloating and occassional C but I'll take it! I haven't weighed myself lately but I can tell by the way my clothes are fitting that I still haven't gained any. I will try your suggestion on the rice cheese, thanks a million Abby you've been so much help
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Anytime..if you ever want to talk or compare notes, i'm here. You can always email me at abby_finestine@yahoo.com
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Abby-IBS-C, Lactose Intolerant, fructose sensitive
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I am 5'7 and 105 pounds. I gave up trying to gain weight. Right now I just worry about a pain free lifestyle and if that means being skinny-so be it! Whenever I try to eat starchy/high calorie foods-I get C. The h*ll with everyone who says I'm too skinny, that I should put some meat on my bones and etc. It insults me! It is just as offensive as if someone was telling me that I am too fat and need to eat less!
I share your pain.
Tatyana.
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IBS-C since 2006. No signs of IBS now, it's been 4 yrs. Only dairy allergy now.
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I have heard the exercise and lifting advice a couple of times. I used to be afraid that if I exercised, I'd burn more calories, lose more weight, and feel even worse. I think I have flawed thinking. I'm going to join a gym and get serious. At a minimum, I think it will increase my appetite, help me to sleep better, and just feel better in general. Even if I am too skinny 
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THANK YOU!! I could not agree more. Someone at work asked me the other day if I knew "crack" Nancy. She is this gal that is very thin and muscular. I looked at the person and said, "HEY! I resemble that comment." They of course then felt bad, but I hardly want people to think I'm doing drugs. I have told people before that it is hurtful when they ask me why I'm so thin. Like they would ask someone why they are so fat. I just don't think people really get it. Anyway, thank you. You made my day. I too want a pain free life
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At work from people who don't know what's going on I've had the following said (comments in red are from me):
"Hey what's up?"
"Same ole, same ole"
"It can't be the same ole if you're losing weight the way you are!"
"You could stand to lose a few, wanna know my secret?"
That person has not since asked me again. Mission accomplished!
"Oh my God you're so skinny!"
"Yeah."
"Whattaya sick or somethin'?"
"Yeah, I'm dying. (I then walked away)
Never get asked questions from that person again! Mission accomplished!
"Wendy, why are you so skinny?"
"Whattaya writing a book?"
No more questions from that person. Mission accomplished!
People are just ignorant and stupid and don't know that if you have nothing smart to say, then don't say nothing at all.
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Wendy IBS A thru Z 
Taking it one day at a time...
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Haha I love it! I have to try some of those!
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Kat
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I cannot agree more - I feel this emense pressure from all of my family and friends to put on weight, which just makes me panic even more - if you put weight on quickly its bad for your health, I wish people who supposedly cared would just shut up and let me get on with it...xx There!!
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BendeeWendee,
Gotta love you! I must try these. I've been getting these stupid comments for the last 10 years and am always so frustrated! I always wish I could strangle these idiots! I definitely will work on my confidence to try some of your lines! I can't stop laughing!
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I love them all! Thanks, Bendee
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IBS-C since 2006. No signs of IBS now, it's been 4 yrs. Only dairy allergy now.
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Yeah, I can't help myself. Now for the bigwigs at work, they're a tad smarter than your regular Joe Shmoe and they ask "wow, what are you doing to lose weight?" to which I answer, "i just reassessed everything in my fridge and I workout"--and that's the truth! They don't have to know why. Only my guys know why and that's what matters. Ah the office life. There's always an assortment of a$$holes.
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Wendy IBS A thru Z
Taking it one day at a time...
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Re:Laura
#318679 - 11/14/07 07:25 PM
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abby6126
Reged: 04/09/07
Posts: 219
Loc: Towson MD
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Hi Laura,
Coming from someone who has always been very athletic, working out helps more than you know. If you are doing a combination of both cardio and weights not only are you burning calories but you are gaining muscle. When I decided to gain weight I started decreasing my cardio slightly and incorporating more weights. I used to focus mostly on my shoulders, arms and back but have since then incorporated legs and butt and I have to say I feel so much better and am gaining more muscle and definition. The better I feel allows me to eat more and also helps me to go to the bathroom completely. So it all helps one another and so far the outcome has been me gaining 5 pounds and I am going to keep going because for the first time in a long time, I feel great! HOpe this helps and please keep me posted on your progress!
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Abby-IBS-C, Lactose Intolerant, fructose sensitive
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Oh yes, my "wonderful" mother-in-law who doesn't understand IBS & won't take the time to understand it thinks I have an eating disorder....fun times... 
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My mother thinks that I dieted myself so much that I got IBS. I never dieted! I started getting sick from fatty foods a while back and whenever I avoided them, she thought I was on a diet. It's amazing how some people always find a way to blame you for every sickness you get. My religious people say that I get sick because of my sins. It makes me angry. My sister gets mad when I mention lactose intollerance over the table. She gets irritated and tells me not to mention it because people will think I am weird. And she is 30 years old! I hate it when people get offended when I tell them I can't eat their dish. They don't believe my reason and take it personally, thinking that I am a snob. Agh!
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IBS-C since 2006. No signs of IBS now, it's been 4 yrs. Only dairy allergy now.
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I am so sorry. I know how that feels. My best friend, who's mom has IBS, still gets upset if she invites me to do something where I know I can't eat a single thing, if I decline. It really hurts me to think that people think I'm making this up. If my family invites me to go out to eat and they always insist on picking the restaurant, and I say no they have nothing there I can eat, they always say, Oh Laura, come on, can't you just go and sit with us? Surely there is something there you can eat? Like I want to sit and watch everyone else eat, or try to get the waiter at the Pancake House to make me an egg white omlette cooked in Pam or Olive Oil. HA! Thanks to everyone for expressing EXCACTLY how I've been feeling.
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Re: Laura
#318768 - 11/15/07 04:00 PM
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TATYANA
Reged: 07/22/07
Posts: 370
Loc: Washington, Seattle
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Oh, I just hate it when people say: you can still sit with us even if you can't eat. Like it's that easy to watch everyone gouble down chocolate cake and barbecue! Just because I can't eat it doesn't mean that I don't want to eat it. It still makes my stomach "talk" and my mouth water. I get angry and jealous when I watch them eat. No, I don't want to be in that invironment.
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IBS-C since 2006. No signs of IBS now, it's been 4 yrs. Only dairy allergy now.
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Thank you. I could not agree more. The more I watch them eat yummy stuff, the more I think I can have just one bite. Then one bite later, I'm starving and eat more bites, and pretty soon I feel horrible and then they are upset I don't want to do all their other planned activities for the day. Ridiculous.
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What?
#318788 - 11/15/07 08:17 PM
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People still think a person pays physically for sins? I thought that was cleared up in the Gospels!
If you tell people what happens to you when you eat certain foods they will not think you are a snob. No one I know feels that way about why I don't eat. You have to be blunt and not embarrassed about it. Why should anyone be embarrassed about not eating things unsafe for IBS? For instance tonight I said, "Brie is my favorite cheese but the last time I ate it I got really sick. I thought I could get away with it but my body said no." Be friendly and open about it. Anyone who truly cares will make efforts to give you non-offensive foods. The people I know who do not put effort/care into having foods I can eat (whole in law family) don't really care for me.
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IBS-A for 20 years with terrible bloating and gas. On the diet since April 2004. Remember this from Heather's information pages:
"You absolutely must eat insoluble fiber foods, and as much as safely possible, but within the IBS dietary guidelines. Treat insoluble fiber foods with suitable caution, and you'll be able to enjoy a wide variety of them, in very healthy quantities, without problem." Please eat IF foods!
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It is always prudent to bring something you can eat to anything you go to. No matter how much you explain your diet to people they just don't get it and can't cook that way without a lot of training. It is just too hard for them to figure out what would be safe for you (I mean look at the questions we get here from people trying to start the diet- it is confusing at first!). Even after much explanation usually people aren't sure. (I am presently writing a book to help people transition to dairy free and low in fat). So you have to bring a dish or two with you. Believe me no one ever minds. I sometimes bring dinner with to my friends' so they don't have to try to figure something out for me. Never expect people to empathize too much. They still have a right to eat their unsafe foods and can't help your situation. So for a Thanksgiving meal: if you bring a pumpkin cake or some muffins or something safe for your dessert and bring a side dish you should be able to eat turkey, cranberries and maybe stuffing and maybe a vegetable too and what you bring.
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IBS-A for 20 years with terrible bloating and gas. On the diet since April 2004. Remember this from Heather's information pages:
"You absolutely must eat insoluble fiber foods, and as much as safely possible, but within the IBS dietary guidelines. Treat insoluble fiber foods with suitable caution, and you'll be able to enjoy a wide variety of them, in very healthy quantities, without problem." Please eat IF foods!
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Re: What?
#318811 - 11/16/07 05:35 AM
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Zara
Reged: 06/07/06
Posts: 883
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True. However, at least for me, I don't always want to feel like I need to explain myself to everyone yet some people feel like it's appropriate for them to make comments. For example, I try to keep it simple by saying I just can't eat dairy. The response I got was "well, my friend just pops a pill before she eats ice cream and she's fine, why don't you do that"? So then I still need to go further and mention the difference between enzymes and proteins and some people just start giving me this look (almost like I'm weird). SO, I'm like, if you don't want me to get into this in the first place, don't make comments. That's what bothers me. Some people ask just because they care and I do appreciate that. But some people just want to make comments about my weight and that's not OK. I'm not too skinny, just slim/healthy (5'10" and about 145) so it bugs me that people always assume I make my dietary requirements so that I wouldn't gain weight. All those comments "oh, you can afford to eat this". Well, I can't. Really. What do they know?
Fortunately, a lot of people I know are understanding and don't say anything. The weird thing is that most of the bad comments come from complete strangers.
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IBS-C, bloating, cramps
pregnant
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How did you get yourself stable? I am losing weight like crazy!!!!! I delieved my son at 142lbs now I am down to like 105..
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I was in the same boat as you and am continuing to lose weight. You really need to follow this diet as closely as possible. I firmly believe that you cannot get stable unless you take the Acacia - are you using it? I use 1 1/2 tsp in the morning and again in the evening. I have also been increasing my carb intake for snacks/etc but am making sure that I eat enough veggies (cooked) daily so I don't get C.
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I am starting to believe that most people make "skinny" comments not out of concern, but out of jealousy. So, to all of us skinny girls out there: Cheers and be proud!
Tatyana.
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IBS-C since 2006. No signs of IBS now, it's been 4 yrs. Only dairy allergy now.
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I saw an orthopedist last week and he said to me: if you loose 5 more pounds, you'll look anorexic. I couldn't believe he said that! What a jerk! Especially when my appointment had nothing to do with my weight!
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IBS-C since 2006. No signs of IBS now, it's been 4 yrs. Only dairy allergy now.
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