What is "stable" for IBS-A people?
#202145 - 08/03/05 01:38 PM
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Anthem
Reged: 10/01/04
Posts: 76
Loc: Phoenix, AZ
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What is stable for IBS-A people? It is permanent normalcy of bowel movements, sort of suspended in the middle between the 2 extremes of constipation and diarrhea? Have people here really attained that? Yes, I have read boasts by a couple people across the internet saying they achieved stability, then they usually hawk some alternative medicine pill (that on study only contains fennel and ginger) or expensive juice only found in Australia.
What is stability for IBS-A?
I am working hard on re-creating my relationship to IBS, because the way it works now is that if I have a firm bowel movement, I am happy. This means I am healthy. If I don't, then I am tense and unhappy and this means I am sick.
But those criteria only are relevant for non-IBS people, who certainly would feel sick if they had "D" for a few days, but for an IBS-A person it is part of the different phases of the moon, right?
One lady said she felt she was stable, yet confessed she just spent an entire month with "D". That don't seem stable to me! Is it an individual thing? Is stability possible with IBS-A? I loath the "D" because it still signifies that I am sick, but does it? I am trying to teach myself that I am well, just going thru that particular phase again.
How do you have a relationship with IBS-A?
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Poop texture has never been a huge problem for me. I would say stable for A is not getting D and not having C. And if something happens that gives me D (like a cold or cheating) then stable to me is not having days of C to follow and if something gives me C (like traveling) then being stable means not getting D from it. I am very regular and almost perfect substance-wise if you know what I mean. (bloating has always been more an issue with me really) I feel the acacia fiber is what made me get over the stable hump. I do wish (in my relationship with A) that I could go just once a day, but that would probably require less fiber and more meat (like a carnivore vs herbivore). So poop-wise I am pretty content! 
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IBS-A for 20 years with terrible bloating and gas. On the diet since April 2004. Remember this from Heather's information pages:
"You absolutely must eat insoluble fiber foods, and as much as safely possible, but within the IBS dietary guidelines. Treat insoluble fiber foods with suitable caution, and you'll be able to enjoy a wide variety of them, in very healthy quantities, without problem." Please eat IF foods!
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not having D every morning.It is being able to leave the house at any given time and not fear having an "accident" or not having to be absolutely sure that there is a bathroom where ever I may be going. Knowing that an attack will eventually subside if I have one. The gas and bloating I think I can live with and control on a daily basis. I accept that.
I think it means something different to everyone, kind of like everyone's syptoms vary drastically. Those are the keys for me. I guess it just depends on what any one person can comfortably live with and what their way of looking at things is. My theory is that this happened to me for a reason. I don't like nor understand what has happened, but I know there is a good reason( and no, I'm NOT religious). Possibly, to have a better understanding and knowledge to help my children with similar problems. Most of my kids have varying intestinal problems, nothing terrible but we never thought twice about it, just dealt with it. Now that I know so much more about how things work, I grimace at the thought of some of the things we've done to help get through situations. Now I can help them more effectively, as well as other family and friends.
Ok, I've rambled on and on. Hope this makes sense.
Alyson
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Everything in life happens for a reason, patience will eventually tell us what that is......
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Thanks, because ultimately my boyfriend (as a reminder, I am gay) says I am obsessed with IBS, and need to make peace and accept it as part of my life instead of being at war with it all the time. He is right. "Resist not evil" and all that jazz. Not sure how to do that except to just allow that having IBS will entail periods when I have "D" and periods when I am just peachy keano! I started this thread to get some ideas from others here what their peachy keano state is, since I sincerely wondered if I am just too hard on myself. For example, in July I had about 20 good days without "D", then I had about a week when I had "D" light symptoms (mushy stuff) and was put on Lorazepam by my GP because I was so filled with anxiety about it. But my partner says that I have to learn to go with the flow (no bad pun intended - oh, gross!), since having a "D" day can make me a nervous wreck. There is still part of me that thinks it means I am sick! In reality, I am just having an IBS D day, although I sure wish I could figure them out and stop them. I try so hard (pity party in progress). I have been making my definition of "stable" be NO IBS "D" EVER AGAIN! Well, not sure that is realistic, but it sure sets me up to be a basket case a few times a month (and someone in another post told me I was lucky not to get PMS?). The worst part of this ailment has been my emotional response. If I can define "stable" in a much looser manner (again, no pun intended as in 'loose as a goose'), then I can perhaps have a better life. If I was a vain teenybopper girl, I'd cry into my pillow every night if I had a zit. This nonsense has got to stop since my partner is threatening to suffocate me with a giant loaf of soluble sourdough bread!
P.S. Yes, ladies, I was a very vain teenager, so I apologize if I insulted females in this post. I even did modeling work for Macys which helped put me through college. But now none of that matters - life is a process of renewing "who" we are, hopefully in more mature terms. Oh, my favorite modeling photo was standing around with some other really handsome guys, all of us in underwear holding footballs or football helmets. Sure, I have football helmet parties all the time, don't you? Wierd! I guess they thought it was kinky having a group of good looking guys standing around smiling at each other in their undies, but giving them sports equipment made it ok! What a society! (smile)
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I am so jealous! It is hard for me to even fathom that there are people with IBS who have regular bowel movements every day. Wow!
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The relationship part is definitely the hardest part for me. I don't know if you know this, but this all started 3 days after my wedding last October, throw on top of that Arthritis set in, at exactly the same time, in my lower back and shoulders and I turned 40 two weeks later(my little pity party)! Not exactly the way I envisioned my 1st year of marriage( I'm sure you know what IBS does to one's sex life). This has been a true test of our relationship. I feel so very fortunate that he is TOTALLY understanding. Funny thing is, I don't know why he is. Just makes him very special, I suppose. I think having someone so understanding has made this a little easier.
Anyway, you'll get there. Don't beat yourself up so much. Maybe try thinking of it as an excuse to stay around the house and do something else rather than thinking of it as bing "sick". As stupid as it sounds, when I start to stress, I just tell myself( in my head of course)"you're ok, you're ok...over and over. I know, I know but it helps me. Accept your partners love, help and understanding for what it is and maybe eventually you'll be able to look at it a little differently...
By the way, I had to laugh about the teenage thing. My 16yr old daughter has been very entertaining lately (hope I don't offend anyone by looking at these incidents with a sense of humor). Yesterday she was storming around the houses because our internet was out most of the day. She was so panicked..."mom, please call comcast, ask them when it will be fixed".... I called them twice just toget her off my back....The last weekend we went camping. This REALLY made me laugh. We made her go with us( I know I'm soooo mean for wanting family time with my teens...:)). We were in an area that has almost no cell service. OMG, this girl stomped around camp because she couldn't check her voice mail. She walked all over trying to get a signal, ranting and raving...."oh my gosh, mom, I can't get a signal grrrr" "I can't check my mesages" she went on and on, it was quite entertaining...:)
Alyson
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Everything in life happens for a reason, patience will eventually tell us what that is......
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this miracle juice found only in Australia. I'd really like some  I feel a bit the same about heaps of american products (like Beano) not to mention the wonderful alternatives to dairy over there that you can't get here! I guess what I imagine stable to be is not being scared of leaving the house in case I need the loo while I'm out. Of having a "normal" (or firm) BM. I'm a bit the same as you. Normal bm = happy me, D = sad and sick me. Good question 
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Amy
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and I was for a little while. And then the month of july came and everything went, um, down the toilet! I've been back and forth between C and D for the entire month of july and beyond. I hope my "stable" moniker didn't throw you for a loop. I thought I had things figured out, but I was wrong.
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Keep on keepin' on...
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Stable for me is having that lovely non-D regular BM or 2 at around the same time every day. For me, it's morning, although lately, something's been happening in the evening, too. (Sorry if that's TMI.) Stable is not being afraid to leave the house without the aid of anything requiring a prescription or having to stop somewhere between here and the other side of town specifically to use the facilities because of an "OMG" moment. Stable is not having D or not being C for more than a day or two. So yeah, it is sorta a "phases of the moon" thing for me. And I can count on things being a little touchy no matter what around "that time of the month." I know that's not an issue for you Anthem being a guy, but it is a thing for a lot of females.
I think in another post you mentioned your partner thinking you are obsessed with IBS. Well, I think about mine often, too. I bet my husband hears about it much more often than he really cares too. Not even the gross stuff, just the day-to-day stuff, like "I wish I could eat ice cream without fear of retribution." I don't know. I'd rather be obsessed and very careful than have an attack that could have been avoided.
Oh, and it took me a couple months of being on the diet before I didn't have D every week. Hang in there!!! 
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Was I your daughter??
that was me to a T, phone growing out of my head! HNow I hate the phone but am glued to the computer!
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Keep on keepin' on...
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