We still don't know what causes it, do we?
#201466 - 08/01/05 02:13 PM
|
|
|
|
Anthem
Reged: 10/01/04
Posts: 76
Loc: Phoenix, AZ
|
|
|
Hi, everyone. I have been so optimistic because I have been taking Lorazepam and paxil, both of which keep my natural anxiety at a very low key. I hoped that this would in turn keep anxiety caused IBS symptoms down to nil. In a sense, that is true, but IBS is so dang complicated. Today (after a respite of about 4 weeks) suddenly I have "D" again.
I am sure that I speak for many of us when I grab a teddy bear and ask God "WHY? WHAT CAUSES THIS?"
I follow Heather's diet impeccably, I take fiber each day, I exercise, I have a healthy mental outlook, and yet FOR NO KNOWN REASON suddenly my pattern of good days ends, and I am back on Immodium. THIS is when the lack of any sense of control kicks in and I just do not know what to do.
Heather seems to think that with proper diet we can lick this thing, but I have not seen this. THere are the proud few who claim "1900 days without a 'D' attack!!" and I want to be one of them. Yet, even with mind mellowing drugs to supplement the soluble fiber diet, and the peppermint caps, and the fiber pills, and a daily Quiet Time praying with God, etc., it is still there when I least plan on it.
Sometimes I feel we are just in the dark ages, like people in the 14th century trying to treat diabetes on our own with just food and faith, while the underlying cause requires much more than their knowledge could provide.
Come on, people! I am usually the happy guy who jokes around. Can I get a few strokes and sympathy? You know how us men are, we get a hangnail and it is a catastrophe. (smile).
Love, Anthem
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Yeah this a bigger problem with ALL the men I think. 
It takes time. You've been doing great but you haven't been doing this for very long yet.
And yes, it's not understood and that's crap. And that does mean that the best we can hope for is control, not a cure. Having the odd bad day when you've been doing everything right is bloody annoying, but it's a hell of alot better than a lifetime of completely out of control and debilitating IBS. And remember as well that there are so many triggers OUT of our control like the weather. 
Hang in there. The bad days get fewer and fewer. Just remember how much better you've been doing recently! 
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Linz, as always, is right on. There are so many factors, and so many of them that are out of our control. Weather is a huge one. Not getting the perfect amount of sleep is another. And personally, no matter what I do, I can NEVER control all the stress in my life. (And hey, look on the bright side... at least you're a guy... us women have PMS to throw into the mix.)
There are a very few of us who have been able to lick this completely, but I'm not one of them. I consider myself stable now, but I still have what I would call minor attacks once or twice a month, where I have to go for my handy dandy bottle of imodium. I also just went through a particularly bad spell where I had D for a month straight. No rhyme or reason to it, it just happened, despite the diet, etc, and anti-anxiety meds. Imodium did me no good. Annoying? Aggravating? A little depressing? Hell yes. But it really DOES make you feel better in the long run if you can remember that (1) you're better than you were, and (2) you were feeling better and you WILL feel better again.
Hang in there... it really DOES get better.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
It is upsetting, discourging, depressing, and enraging so consider yourself given all the sympathy you can imagine. However, as both Linz and AtomicRose have said, better a few bad days than a few good ones. And, hey, at least no one is trying to cup us, leech us, or exorcise us.
PS - Aren't you supposed to be off at a clinic for two weeks about now?
--------------------
[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
I'm replying to the kind folks who responded. Thanks! We all need a hug from time to time. One thing I have to do is stop "Catastrophizing". I tend to do this (I see an invisible chorus of friends all nodding their heads).
I keep a diary of my daily food/meds, symptoms (hopefully none) and emotional overall daily status. Well, I color coded these for the doctor (although he has no interest in it and just says FIBER FIBER FIBER). Anyway, Green is a great deal, yellow is fair/cautionary, and in keeping with the traffic light system, red is a really bad bad day.
Now, I automatically made any day with "D" a Red day, but today, for example, I realized that except for the bout in the bathroom and my emotional feeling about it, today is FINE! I went to the Fitness CLub to work out, I did some projects around the house, and I feel pretty good!
So, maybe I need to stop considering any bout of "D" a Red day, and change my classification system to allow myself to have more GOOD days even when in the middle of a "D" situation. I always saw "D" as a failure on my part, that no matter what I do, I have failed. And there are times when "D" is definitely a Red day, oh....yeah! But other times it is like my friend said naively but truly "What difference does it make? It comes out, some days fast, some days slow, some days perfect, you carry on with your day instead of making up hymns about it all."
Thanks again and I do console with you all who have problems in this area, and seemingly cope without needing to be cuddled very 5 minutes. Guys can be so self centered at times, but isn't that what makes us so adorable? I better stop now.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Quote:
It is upsetting, discourging, depressing, and enraging so consider yourself given all the sympathy you can imagine. However, as both Linz and AtomicRose have said, better a few bad days than a few good ones. And, hey, at least no one is trying to cup us, leech us, or exorcise us.
PS - Aren't you supposed to be off at a clinic for two weeks about now?
Thanks for remembering. I cancelled this after learning some alarming information about this clinic. For $7000 I really could not bring myself to go there, especially after repeated calls asking for what program they have specifically for IBS and what their past results are got no response. This place probably does help some people, but it seen more as a "last resource" for people who have cancer and other incurable problems. I talked to a woman who took her daughter there, and although her daughter was helped, she was wary of me going there for IBS.
The first thing they would do to me is make me fast for a week, which I am not sure is very good for an IBS person that is accustomed to getting soluble fiber and trying to maintain a stable process. Then they stick a hose up the anus and force out anything inside, which I was warned can cause severe cramping and even lead to infection if the equipment is not clean. Then they give you lots of chemicals to induce "the runs" (if you havent already got them) to clear you out some more, stick you with pins, and caress your aura while dropping hot oils on your body. I just was not sure at this point that my IBS could handle this.
NOTE: I CANNOT VERIFY ANY ASSERTIONS MADE ABOUT THIS CLINIC. I AM ONLY RESPONDING TO PUBLIC INFORMATION POSTED ON THE INTERNET. IF ANYONE WOULD LIKE TO SEE IT, HERE IS A LINK.
http://www.quackwatch.org/11Ind/young.html
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
No, we don't, which is very frustrating for me, because I am a Chemical Engineer and my nature and my chemistry classes have made always look for a reason for something.
I hate the way I have to eat, to keep this thing under control. I think back to college when I was a healthy eater (fresh fruit, raw veggies, whole wheat bread), whereas most of my friends lived on alcohol, cigarettes, hamburgers and pizza. They are all fine, and I am screwed up. It is so not fair.
If my IBS did not stop me from doing things I want to do. I would go back to school and become a gastroenterologist so I could figure this thing out for all of us. But I can't imagine having to sit through class with the way my tummy feels most days.
Okay that is the end of my whining.......I am doing better than ever, and consider this website a blessing, but it is still very frustrating.
Good luck. Like someone else said.....the good days do really out number the bad. 
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Casey is so right when she says that women are worse off because they have PMS to deal with as well. That definitely enhances IBS with more gas and bloating. Anyways, if you stop and think "Thank God" that we all found Heather and her diet. I can't imagine trying to deal with IBS without her. At least we all have her diet guidelines to follow and people we can talk to on these message boards. Cheer up and as everyone here has already said, having more good days is way better than just a few bad.
It sounds like you're doing well for the most part.
Carol
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Thank you so much...there are so many factors. Who knows? Maybe it was the scary violent movie that I watched last night with friends and found rather horrible (certainly my subconscious wasn't pleased). But as a guy, I like to feel in control, and this ailment has led me so often to feeling out of control. I sat quietly a few moments ago and asked the universe if I could see IBS differently. What I got in my mind was "You are terrified, so very scared of IBS". I guess that may seem obvious, but I really had not seen it that way. I have been so very frightened. Then I got the feeling that I need to give that fear away to the deity of my choice, at least a little bit, day by day, and to make IBS more benign. For example, I have such stern rules. If I have "D", then it is a BAD day. Why? I can have "D" and still feel fine otherwise, so what makes it a bad day except a value judgment on my part? Yes, I have days where I am not really able to function socially, but I often can.
So, I am trying to redefine my relationship with this thing, this IBS, this so-called syndrome in a way that brings me more peace. The manly way of controlling it has not worked to my satisfaction so far (my partner in life says I remind him of John Crichton, trying to manage the entire Universe in Farscape).
IBS has been with me many years, so I am not new to it, but it is a newly humbling experience and (yes) it scares me. God forgive my silliness. As one old saying goes "Her complaints bespeak her privilege" (as she complains about her dusty diamonds, the peasants starve). I know I complain about IBS, whereas others routinely deal with much more life threatening ailments. But when we are each alone, it is still scary, and I can see why the ancients personified illness as demons. Wish Jesus was here to send this IBS into a herd of pigs (but where would I find a herd of pigs in this neighborhood? The Home Owners Association wouldn't allow them. Come to think of it, not sure what their policy on Jesus is either! There is a strict dress code to use the Golf Club Snack Bar).
You all are so helpful to me. Thank you again.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Your "D" is clearing all the toxins out of your body for free! Hurrah! I'd try the IBS self-hypnosis tapes before spending any money on a clinic that wants to roto-route you up the wazoo.
Keep in mind that some psychiatric meds cause the squirts. One that actually helps IBS symptoms is Elavyl, which helps with pain, insomnia, and "D." I loved it when I was on it, but because of heart palpitations (which may or may not have been caused by the med), I was taken off. Sigh. Gone are the days of sound sleep.
Anthem, I think it all boils down to being cursed with being sensitive. We just have sensitive tummies.
Hey, aren't you the one who was willing to swing a chicken around and howl if it would stop the IBS? I tired it, it doesn't work.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
As I was sitting on the can today, I asked myself if I'd give up my life savings of about $100,000 to get rid of IBS. And I decided I would. Who penned that saying "When you've got your health, you've got everything."
I tried Elavil and it was awful for me. I was in a daze all the time, lost all libido and was totally impotent. I had to consider which is the worse problem, and decided THAT was much worse than the IBS. It is an eirie thing to have the most erotic hot nasty pictures to test the libido and finding yourself as limp as a wet cigarette in a mud puddle. Forget it, I'm not old enough to throw in the towel on a sex life, so I had to stop taking it. My partner was thrilled: we smashed them together. Now I am on Lorazepam and Paxil and do not have these problems. Paxil delays an orgasm but once you have it, you are grateful you worked at it.
Are there other ailments like this where what works for one does not help another at all? Or is this the norm in modern medicine?
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
It's not the only ailment...look at anxiety. Paxil has been great for you and your libido, but for another, it's Mr. Rogers in the bedroom.
I hear you. What's worse, the disease or the cure? And then there's the meds that increase your symptoms (Prozac gave me panic attacks). It's great that you found meds that work for you.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Well, if the needle sticking part is accupunture that may actually help, but the rest of it sounds horrendous. I skimmed the link you provided - I wouldn't go either.
Your "coloring" approach to IBS made me smile, When I was color-coding my days, I had red and orange "D days" to distinguish ones that were a total loss and ones that were just D. As for your new approach, someone suggested something similar to me a while back: wake up, figure out what you feel well enough to do that day, and do it. Don't wait until you feel totally fine to do something.
And I don't think men need to be cuddled any more than women - I just think women tend to feel like they shouldn't ask for it.
Take care. I wish you nothing but green days on your calendar.
--------------------
[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Quote:
Your "D" is clearing all the toxins out of your body for free! Hurrah! I'd try the IBS self-hypnosis tapes before spending any money on a clinic that wants to roto-route you up the wazoo.
Talk about a positive attitude. And I love your "roto-route you up the wazoo" - ROTFLUTS - what a great image!
--------------------
[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Hi, Sand et al. hit it right on the nose! One D-day after 4
weeks without symptoms seems great to me. In fact, I had
a D attack(well actually, I don't know if it was an 'attack'),
and I was elated. I had been soooo C that I thought I was
totally losing the ability to deficate. As a last ditch
effort, I decided to try drinking ample prune juice, and
either it worked or the Paxil is kicking in and causing
it. In any case, to have an empty bowel after weeks of
bad C feels wonderful. I haven't felt this good since
after my last colonoscopy when I was still full of Demerol.
Anyway, there are lots of people a lot worse off than you,
you should be pretty happy. -Bob
--------------------
<img src="http://www.math.mtu.edu/~rwkolkka/BritPicA.jpg">
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Hi Anthem
it's funny, I've just spent the last two weeks freaking out at the return of my IBS-D and feeling anxious, not wanting to go out, scared, blah blah. It's like you say: WHY is a day with D a 'BAD day'? It's not as if my head has dropped off? Plus, since I'm emetophobic, it's definitely the lesser of two evils!!
It was also cool to hear you mention God: as an Orthodox Christian I get huge comfort from my faith, as well as giving mysel a hard time (WHY are you ill? Is your faith not enough? etc.etc.). Anyway, I was reading an awesome book which discussed modern spiritual elders in Greece and Elder Joseph (1898-1959) said this (which made me cry, but I'm a girl)
"Don't fear sicknesses, even when you suffer up to the edge of death. As God is constantly present, why do you worry? 'In Him we live and move'. Our struggle is in His embrace. We breathe God, we are surrounded by God, we touch God, we mystically eat God. Wherever we turn, wherever we look, God is everywhere: in Heaven, on earth, in the abyss, in wood, in rocks, in your mind, in your heart. So doesn't He see what you bear? That you suffer? Tell Him your complaints ad you will see... healing in your soul and your body."
HTH - it certainly helped me to breathe a little easier this morning.
Katherine
p.s. I routinely avoid scary movies etc. cos even if my 'conscious' mind is ok with it, I know that it will affect my nervous system without my permission...
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Hi Anthem,
I can completely relate to your catastrophying the situation. When I am stable, I can be so strong mentally and view my IBS as an inconvenience, but not something that I want to run my life. I think about how (and this is only my opinion) IBS is a part of my life because God wants to teach me something, or wants to bring out a part of my person that needs to be exposed, or wants me to gain strength etc... I can be so clear and calm about this disease UNTIL......................
I have the dreaded attack.
then all of the above goes out the window, and I visit the ugly world of "why me". I have gotten a bit better about it though. I have a few mantras that I repeat to myself. The main one being "this will pass as it always does and I will feel better soon". It is just so hard to feel positive when your body is so out of control and nothing you do seems to help. It's really scarey. Just keep telling yourself that it will get better. Your diet is better so your attacks will be few and far between. Also, know that sometimes we have attacks out of the blue, despite our best efforts at diet, etc... Unfortunately, it just happens.
Just know that you will get better and that you have friends here that you can come to anytime for hugs and encouraging words.
Hang in there!!!
--------------------
Dana
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Quote:
Hi Anthem
it's funny, I've just spent the last two weeks freaking out at the return of my IBS-D and feeling anxious, not wanting to go out, scared, blah blah. It's like you say: WHY is a day with D a 'BAD day'? It's not as if my head has dropped off? Plus, since I'm emetophobic, it's definitely the lesser of two evils!!
It was also cool to hear you mention God: as an Orthodox Christian I get huge comfort from my faith, as well as giving mysel a hard time (WHY are you ill? Is your faith not enough? etc.etc.). Anyway, I was reading an awesome book which discussed modern spiritual elders in Greece and Elder Joseph (1898-1959) said this (which made me cry, but I'm a girl)
"Don't fear sicknesses, even when you suffer up to the edge of death. As God is constantly present, why do you worry? 'In Him we live and move'. Our struggle is in His embrace. We breathe God, we are surrounded by God, we touch God, we mystically eat God. Wherever we turn, wherever we look, God is everywhere: in Heaven, on earth, in the abyss, in wood, in rocks, in your mind, in your heart. So doesn't He see what you bear? That you suffer? Tell Him your complaints ad you will see... healing in your soul and your body."
HTH - it certainly helped me to breathe a little easier this morning.
Katherine
p.s. I routinely avoid scary movies etc. cos even if my 'conscious' mind is ok with it, I know that it will affect my nervous system without my permission...
I appreciate every single comment everyone offers, although I only respond to a few of them.
Thanks for the words above. I belong to the Unity Church but also study the Course of Miracles, which seems to believe that the entire universe was sort of a mistake, and that if we were awake, it would be like leaving the movie MATRIX, except instead of finding yourself in a horrible world we'd find ourselves ONE with God. We are each then on a path (for 1 life or millions) to awaken. It takes time to become timeless.
I say to myself "I am the body of Christ" and "Thank you God for my health, wealth, spiritual wisdom, peace and strength". My church, the Unity church, suggests that prayers be affirmations rather than pleading requests, so instead of affirming "I am scared, God help me" I tend to depersonalize it and say something like "my mind and body are feeling fear and tension, and the love of God is soothing me now."
Of course, as my minister said recently, God works through us. So if there is a medication that helps, take it! Who knows what inspiration and guidance helped produce that medication for all of us still inside this "dream"?
Today I did volunteer work for the church. I never told the senior minister about IBS. He stopped by and asked how I was doing. Usually I give him the routine "Fine" response but today I told him. He came around to the back of my chair and put his hands on my shoulders and said a long silent prayer and hugged me, which touched my heart (because he is not a touchy feely kind of guy).
Bless all of you who are suffering yet take time to respond to me. My medication, Lorazepam and Paxil seem to have married each other and relieved anxiety attacks that usually accompanied "D". However, in their wake I have a lot of drowsiness, so I go through the day like a teenager who was out carousing half the night or like an old geezer who needs an afternoon nap. I guess it is a mild trade off to panic and hyperventilating.
Today was a miracle. Yesterday I had a "D" flareup - took immodium right away. I assumed this would shut down the system for a day or more....instead this morning I had a bowel movement and the stool was a perfectly formed large smooth torpedo, as good as it gets. For an IBS person, that's a miracle!
I think if we can emotionally get a handle on this, that is at least HALF the challenge. I also ask what I am supposed to learn from this, where is God in this pain, how can I reduce the symptoms? Who would I be without this IBS? Will there be a post-IBS me (in terms of being more mature about it and having a life without or inspite of it?). It is definitely a deepending experience for me, and since I intend to begin chaplain training in the fall, it has increased my empathy for the physical pain of others.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
I'd just like to chime in and say that I know exactly what you mean. As a C, I strongly feel that I will never have any long number of days without an "attack." For me, an attack is when I get mega bloated for no reason and feel awful. And really, most times it comes out of nowhere. I follow the diet to a T, exercise, do EVERYTHING that is suggested and still am not "stable" - honestly, I don't think I ever will be.
Want to know something interesting? My IBS is much worse since I started this diet. It got better for a bit in the beginning, but since then, it has been downhill.
Well, done with my rant. Good luck to you, because from what I've read, D's have at least a better chance at controlling the attacks, so know that it is possible. 
--------------------
Elizabeth
all those years it wasn't IBS - it was celiac!
send me an email: liz@dopple.net
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Elizabeth, how do you deal with this emotionally? How do we come to the acceptance that this will probably be our life from now on? How do you not get totally depressed, frustrated, and tired of trying to feel better and not making any progress?
I am so very tired...and the thought of life with this pain and constipation is just too much most days. 
--------------------
~ Beth
Constipation, pain prodominent,cramps, spasms and bloat!
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Do I remember correctly that you were going to see some super-duper specialist(s) this Summer? Has that already happened? If so, what did they say?
--------------------
[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
I know, Anthem, I sooo know!
I shouldn't be 'not sore anymore, " because I've been sooo sore. I went thorough about 3 weeks of HUGE C, and today I'm D. I've fallen off the wagon as far as being committed to it all so it's partly my fault. All I can say is BIG HUGS...it's NOT fun when you think you have it under control.
And you're right, we know nothing of this disorder right now!! Some day!! 
--------------------
Keep on keepin' on...
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
Posts
