Telling People
#126775 - 12/01/04 04:40 PM
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I haven't told my friends about my IBS because I'm worried that they might not be too mature about it. Even if I did tell them, I'd only feel comfortable telling the two that I hang out with the most (for now). Is this something I can/should keep from my friends? I feel like I should tell them, but I don't want them to make jokes. (Not to underestimate the maturity levels of some young people) These friends are 20 years old, so they're pretty young (older than me, but I find that people who don't have IBS or aren't living with someone with IBS don't seem to be as understanding about the condition) and I don't want them to joke about it because I'm really embarrassed about it.
Another thing I've been wondering is if I should tell my teachers (all or just a few) about my problem. They have a vague note that explains that all the times I'm late are excused and they shouldn't hassle me about being late. They haven't given me any trouble about being late so far, and I don't want to tell them unless I think it would help. I'm afraid that if I tell a teacher about this, they'll mention it to their classes (either on purpose or unintentionally).
Maybe I'm not giving my friends and teachers enough credit. If any high school or college students are reading this, did you tell your teachers that you have IBS and did that help at all? Also, how mature have your friends reacted to you telling them about your IBS?
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I made a post about this here
Actually, I just sent my boyfriend the link to this site, over messenger.
His response thus far:
Andrew says:
Ah.
Andrew says:
That's....
I feel better though...minus the fact that I'm cramping. *goes to get water bottle*
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I am not too young anymore (26 actually), but when i tell people I describe it as food senstivities and allergies, and I tell them I have to be careful about what I eat. I don't use the words "Irritable Bowel Syndrome" because most people don't understand it.
Only my family ever hears me say Irritable Bowel.....otherwise I just say stomach sensitivities. I even have a best friend of 3 1/2 years, who has no idea, she just knows I won't eat out at restaurants with her becaue I have food allergies and can't trust the restaurants. I just don't think everyone needs to know my personal business.
On the other hand, many people on this site, say they have felt relieved after telling people. I wish I was as brave as some of them.
Your really close friends should understand.
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keep us updated.. I don't know that I would have done that.. but who knows.. I have tummy issues and have always said that.. as well as explained to some people I eat with regularly (at work and part of groups) that I have food sensititivities and certain things I can't have... one jokes with me that instead of asking if I want X (a mint, or anything else she might be offering) she asks if I can eat it... because half the times she's offered me thigns I've turned her down because I can't.. on the other hand she knows I'll bring her yummy treats if she asks! and we did thanksgiving together and she made all the dairy based things DH loves and I can't have for him!
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Dietetics Student (anticipating RD exam in Aug 2010)
IBS - A
Dairy Allergic
Fructose and MSG intollerant
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I am not embarrassed at all about telling people. I think of it like this, what we have a good deal of the time is something EVERYONE has once in awhile- after a bad burger or just whenever. If people make jokes then join in with them if you want; there are a lot of jokes that can be made about IBS and I usually have a few of my own. Also remember that supermodels take laxatives all the time to lose weight and so even sexy gorgeous people spend a lot of time in the bathroom! 
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IBS-A for 20 years with terrible bloating and gas. On the diet since April 2004. Remember this from Heather's information pages:
"You absolutely must eat insoluble fiber foods, and as much as safely possible, but within the IBS dietary guidelines. Treat insoluble fiber foods with suitable caution, and you'll be able to enjoy a wide variety of them, in very healthy quantities, without problem." Please eat IF foods!
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All my friends know about my "crazy diet" and they are very understanding. At first I was also nervous about telling other people about IBS, but I found that talking to my close friends about it helped me emotionaly and as a side benefit a few of htme said "oh wow.. I think that might be my problem too" at least two of my friends have started to consider Heather's diet.
Just tell your firends that you have IBS. If they ask what that is tell them. If they want to know more you can add details or just explain to them about how it effects your life and diet. Once you start to open up it gets easier to continue.
As far as your teachers are concerned you don't have to tel them if you have that Dr. note. If you decide to tell them just ask them to keep it confidential and they will.
Good luck. 
Chany
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Hi there,
I have found telling the people close to me very helpful. I am a bit like the others and people who I Im not that close to I tend to just tell them I have a sensitive stomach or something along them lines, just makes things a little easier than having to explain the ins and outs!!
My family, BF and flatmate I have explained all about it too and they seem to understand but the BF still gets a little confused now and again(doesnt take much,  !) We even have a joke or two about it and have even given my episodes the name of 'bumisms'!
It certainly helps to me able to laugh about it sometimes otherwise I think I would lose the plot!!
Good luck.
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Once we started to tell people that my husband had IBS it was astounding how many people said "me too" or yeah my sisters all have that etc.
I know your younger so it is a little different. Just go slow kids sometimes don't know what to do with that information. They don't know what is the right way to respond. So en essence, your right, they might not be mature enough.
Good Luck and I am sorry you even have to deal with this.
Lefty
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I would just tell them something vagues to the effect that you have a very sensitive stomach, can't you eat a lot of "normal" foods and that sometimes your stomach gets upset and you need to use the washroom a bit more than most.
If they're your friends, they should be supportive and concerned with your well being. I've told all my friends and they've all been super great!
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I am 30yrs old. When I was your age I really didn't know what was wrong with me. I didn't tell my professers in college. I really didn't need to if I needed to leave that was ok in College. Now a days I don't care who knows. We joke all the time at work and at home about it. I get my kids dressed in the morning while I am on the big T. My kids call me the pooper. It doesn't bother me one bit if people know. Yes alot of people don't understand IBS. I feel like it could be good to get the word out so more people will understand this horrible syndrome we suffer from. Well Good luck. I hope you become more comfortable with IBS. Unfortunatley it is not like a bad haircut that will grow back.
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