It is my 13th Anniversary today.
#86649 - 07/06/04 05:24 AM
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BarbaraS
Reged: 02/12/03
Posts: 1939
Loc: Wisconsin
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I know it should be an exciting day, but we are going through a rough peroid right now.
We also have company today - my husband's sister and her family. It is not a bad thing they are coming today, because they will keep the tension down.
Please remind me the good things about marriage, so I can cheer up today. 
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Happy Anniversary!! I will be going on 14 years in September.You arent alone, things arent so great on my end either.Makes me wonder how all these long lasting marriages survive? Hope you cheer up and he does something nice for you today!! ~~~~Tanya
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Happy Anniversary Barbara.
Ok here it goes:
Carry heavy stuff
take out the trash
walk the dog
fix the car
cook on the grill
fix stuff around the house
play with the kids
do most of the driving on trips
keep ya warm on a cold night
set up the stero, vcr, computer, etc.
can find a bathroom anywhere quickly
take all the family photos and videos
These are some of the things that I try to remember when I am feeling frustrated with my hubby.
Hope you have a good day.
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Janey
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To Barbara
#86670 - 07/06/04 06:45 AM
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barbie
Reged: 04/22/04
Posts: 2435
Loc: Texas
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Hey Barbara,
I am so sorry that you are having a rough time, especially on your anniversary.  Happy Anniversary, anyway. Have you just recently been having problems?
We have been married 37 yrs and there were some rough spots along the way, too. Especially when you are trying to raise children....that just adds to the tension sometimes. And then there's the "mid life crisis" trauma. I think most good marriages go through rough patches at some time or another.
It always helped me to write down how I felt and then get all my ideas together and then we would talk and try to work it out....with some give and take on both our parts.
Anyway, I am so glad I stuck it out because I am happier now than ever....But I still get mad at him like yesterday when we were pressure washing the driveway and it was hot and I was ready to be through and he kept pushing.....let's do a little bit more<<<WAH>>>I got through it, though, and then he took me out for Italian food afterwards and I was better than ever!!! 
Do you have a friend you can talk to? I know I worked with a girl that had lots of husband problems and after she talked it out with me she always felt better. It's not good to keep it all inside.
Good Luck
Barbie
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ok, i'm single so frankly i have no idea what the good parts of marriage are....
i'm sorry you're having troubles. still, 13 is a milestone, no!?
ok. let's see if i can give you some good things...
- you know who to blame when the toilet seat is up
- sometimes, there's someone else to take out the trash, even if you have to mention it a few times before it gets done
- in-house bug-killer
- when married, there's someone else who is responsible for going to stare at the open-hooded malfunctioning car incomprehensively. saves you the time!
- husbands are handy jar openers
- there is ALWAYS someone else to blame when you're married
- no one asks you "so... when are you getting married?" (remember how irritating that was!?)
hmmm... that's my starter list. i'll add more later!
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Hey Girlfriend!
I can tell you why you should remain married. One word: Ferrari! 
(Sorry.) Just can't get my mind off that beauty.....
Okay, here's my pitch, for what it's worth.
Don and I will be celebrating our 37th next week. I think we're lucky; we have a good marriage. More than anything, we're best friends; we have great respect for each other. We've been married to each other longer than we were single; neither of us could imagine life without the other.
It wasn't always that way. We had tough times; we came very close to separating on our 6th anniversary. It was the Women's Movement that caused such a change in our relationship. It was a good thing, believe me, but it was a difficult time, and we almost didn't make it. Thankfully, Don saw the error of his ways!
It really comes down to this: do you love him? Do you want to spend the rest of your life with him? Do you respect each other? Is he your best friend? Can you talk to each other and work things out between you, no matter what's happened? Can you forgive him?
I'm not the same person I was when he married me. But then, neither is he. We were such opposites that none of our friends thought we'd last. While it's been a bumpy road, it's also been an exciting one. Nothing boring about our married life! Well, maybe now -- but not back then!
Damn, am I rambling again?
Honey, if you love the guy, and if you're sure he loves you, whatever the problem, work it out.
Don't forget the Ferrari!
Bev
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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..... I can see that my friend Wacky WIW will make an excellent wife!
Well, with one exception: she doesn't realize that the toilet seat is NEVER left up. No, no, no. Bad chee. Number one Fung Sui rule: all your fortune goes right down unless you keep that lid closed!
I look forward to taking on the "more later" .....
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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There are things that you know you can't do together. Power washing the driveway. Hanging wallpaper. (Worse fight we ever had was while hanging that damn wallpaper -- the stuff ended up one panel right side up, the next right side down, all around the room! And that's how we left it -- believe it or not! Actually sold the house that way!)
Pick your fights. Is it really that important if he uses your best towel to dry off his car? Let him have the damn towel; go out and buy a better one! Does it really matter that he told the neighbor it was okay to cut down that tree that you loved so much on your property line? Go out and buy a fabulous-looking Japanese maple and plant it there.
Bottom line: would that bed be warmer without him lying next to you?
Smooches.
Bevvy
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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toilet seats
#86703 - 07/06/04 08:00 AM
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jenX
Reged: 08/11/03
Posts: 3252
Loc: Richmond, VA
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lemme tell ya, in my home the seat better not ever be left up! in fact, the whole thing needs to be closed (so males and females do the same amount of work, so what's the biggie!?) my ex and i used to fight about that when we first started living together. then he realized why i am such a stickler. the first time he sat down in the puddles on the seat from my rambunctious cat who loved to "fish" in the potty, well, he got the point! the seat was never up again!
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tell me about the Fung Sui rule for the toilet seat. Teach me that trick, sis, please will ya, huh???? Got up in the middle of the night once in a semi-sleep state to go pee and ...fell in.....WOAH, WOKE ME RIGHT UP!!!! There was a lot of chatter about it the next day and I think he got the message. Hope so....I'm too old for that kind of excitement.
I think Jen has a pretty good idea about marriage. I especially like the in-house bug killer. We have these especially large water bugs (also known as roaches) and sometimes they escape into the house. After I scream..EEEEK.. and run around like a crazy person I called to my hubby...my hero....and he killed it and picked it up and threw it away. Whew!! Maybe I should cut him some slack on the toilet thing....whadda ya think???
Barbie
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Happy Anniversary! Keep your chin up and remember to breathe. Whenever the stress kicks in for me I just say 'breathe'. I know that is not the solution but it helps me to think in order to solve the problem. We fall in love and out of love and back in again many times during married life. Learn to laugh and rent some comedies. Married many, many years here.
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together, three married, so I don't think I have the longevity to offer much advice. Sometimes, though, when he really makes me angry I imagine him dying in an accident, and then I get really upset and I realize I still want him around. But I'm sorry you're having a rough day and a rough patch and I'll be thinking of you.
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Cut No Slack --
#86724 - 07/06/04 08:41 AM
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Bevvy
Reged: 11/04/03
Posts: 5918
Loc: Northwest Washington State
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-- on the toilet lid issue. Maybe it's just me, but I don't think so. No one wants to walk into your home and have to look into your toilet. It's disgusting. I don't care how clean it is!
I watch a lot of the Home & Garden TV shows about home sales: "Sell This House," "House Hunters," and others. I'm amazed at the number of homes people go into to view for a possible sale in which the toilet seat was left up and the prospective buyers walk into the bathroom and are given a lovely view of the inside of the toilet. What were the sellers thinking?! It's disgusting. Sometimes the water is yellow! EW.
It's gross.
Okay, even if you don't believe in Fung Sui, the question is: why not put the lid down? How difficult is it? If you leave the lid up, you're inviting all kinds of things to fall down there. What do you have hanging on the wall above the toilet? How many times have those items fallen in?
And don't get me started on leaving the lid up and going away for any period of time. My friend owned a ranch in the country -- a second residence -- and her parents always warned her to never leave the lid up. She discovered why when we went to visit one time, and had to open up the property after an extensive absence. We walked into the bathroom, the toilet lid was up, and there was a gigantic dead and decomposing rat wrapped around the inside of the toilet, floating in the water!
Now, if that doesn't convince everyone to keep the lid closed, I don't know what else would.
Bev
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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After 29 years, I can tell you that making it through the rough times is worth it.
I can't tell you how many of our Anniversary's, there were dissagreements, arguments, and down right burn the dish towel fights! One year, we were going out the door to a very nice restaurant, over an hours drive away. I was all dolled up and looking gorgeous ,hehe. Went out to turn on the ac in the truck to get it all cooled down, when he comes out and asked me if I picked up his jeans at the cleaner ????    Uhhh, I don't think so......know this, Cowboy doesnt go anywhere without his nicely fresh starched Wrangler jeans...Ahem..., needless to say, he was a very unhappy camper. He said thats it, and I said, fine with me! We stayed at home and he had a sandwich.....I had no appetite after that. Now, I see to it that he has PLENTY OF STARCHED SHIRTS, JEANS AND SLACKS!!!!!!!! MAKE NO MISTAKE.
I look back on it now, I really don't laugh, but, we go on and make the best of every new day. One thing we have learned is to overlook the small stuff, and there is plenty of that. We even let each other vent and roll our eyes as they walk away, feeling as if the other has unloaded a 10 ton boulder from our shoulders. That is a good thing we do for each other.
Our Anniversary is on Sunday the 11th, we will probably be working cows that day and I will be in the kitchen cooking big food to feed the hungry cowboys and girl.
We are planning a nice trip very soon, it makes it a little easier to stand in the hot kitchen. This work has to be done, and sometimes you can't stop and celebrate at the moment. We will kiss, hug, and make sure the other knows exactly how much they are loved before starting the day.
listen to me, ramble on. I just want the younger girls to know that if you really love each other, it may take a little work or a lot of work to get through this one. But if you can, it is soooo worth it when the kids leave home, and you are back to having just each other , I promise !!! Hope it gets better so you can enjoy each other before the day is done!
Edited by gigi (07/06/04 09:00 AM)
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Yeah our 7th anniversary was horrible too. I figure for me it was partly PMS. Things have been better since then, although I was excited to see him go to work today. Too much time together lately is just too much when we are stuck at home and it's raining. I'm tired of tv and computers. Let's throw everything out, that is how I feel right now. The girls are going to lose a lot of toys soon. Good thing for them that we have to go to the dr. in an hour or they would be saying goodbye to most of them now.
I realize I am not giving you good things about marriage but let's face it, my husband is there when I need him. He left everything and came rushing to the dr. 5 weeks ago when we had the scare. He takes care of the girls when I need a break. He did dishes last night and ran to the store to get bread since the one I bought was moldy (made me throw up). I sometimes need to remember why I love him too. Thanks for making me think about the good things and not dwell on things that drive me crazy.
Happy Anniversary!! 13 years is a good thing. Look at the good.
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more...
#86732 - 07/06/04 08:52 AM
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jenX
Reged: 08/11/03
Posts: 3252
Loc: Richmond, VA
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- call screener: when you don't want to pick up the phone, delegate!
- on the best of days, decision-maker: men are occasionally good at picking movies and/or restaurants when you just don't wanna do it yourself. (they think it's empowering. hee hee. fools!)
- often they are good at reaching the high stuff
- in a related line, they are often good at lifting the heavy stuff
- what would we talk about without them in our lives!?
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ew. -nt-
#86734 - 07/06/04 08:53 AM
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jenX
Reged: 08/11/03
Posts: 3252
Loc: Richmond, VA
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Oh, Barbara, I'm sorry to hear that. I haven't read the other posts yet (I will, they look funny!), but I just wanted to share something with you.
Andy and I have been married 20 years now and have been together 23 years. Ten years ago, I almost left him (he doesn't know). We were going through a VERY rough patch. I was so furious with him that I barely spoke to him for a whole year (he never even noticed!! One of my nicknames for him is Sir Laurence Oblivier!!)
While I was trying to decide what to do, I gave myself an "emotional divorce" from him. I thought of him as my difficult roommate rather than my husband. This allowed me to gain enough distance, enough perspective that I could see all the reasons it would petrify me to actually leave him!! Then gradually, while I was fretting and stewing over what to do, something shifted. Both in me and my attitudes and in him. Things got more tolerable and eventually they got wonderful again.
Now, ten years later, we are more deeply in love than ever, highly compatible in our interests and activities, supportive of each other in times of trouble, and best friends. He's my soul mate.
I'm sure we'll have rough patches again. We're both human after all. But THANK GOD I didn't leave him. THANK GOD I didn't say the unforgiveable things that would have damaged our marriage forever. THANK GOD I was guided by Someone who knew better than me what was best for me. Because I sure would have messed up my life otherwise.
So give yourself an emotional divorce for a while! You'll come back to your marriage further down the road with new enthusiasm and appreciation for the good things about sharing your life for better or worse with another flawed but forgivable human being.
Hope things get better soon. If they don't here's one more good thing about staying married. Statistics show that after a divorce, a man's standard of living goes up on average and the woman's standard of living goes down!! Don't you DARE give him that satisfaction!!
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Laura
Keep it simple!
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Quote:
Sometimes, though, when he really makes me angry I imagine him dying in an accident, and then I get really upset and I realize I still want him around.
Chinagirl!! Great technique, I'll have to remember that one!!
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Laura
Keep it simple!
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Oh, yeah and then there's the saying I heard once:
"MEN!! Can't live with em, can't kill em!!"
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Laura
Keep it simple!
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Re: Laura Sue
#86761 - 07/06/04 09:25 AM
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gigi
Reged: 03/21/04
Posts: 1442
Loc: South Texas
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I've heard that saying, its a good one.
I have a friend who says, "I'm gonna kill him and tell God he died". 
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I'm a newly wed...6 mos. on the 9th. (we've been together for 7 years though) I don't really have any advice. But I would like to say, I hope things get better for you. 
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~ Rachel (IBS-C)
If life hands you lemons, make lemonade!!
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Happy 13th too! We just celebrated out 13th too on May 18. However, we dated 9 years before we got married so technically........we've been together 22 years. More than 1/2 our lives......All been good though.
I saw by your pics that you have three handsome boys....I have two. Ages 6 & 9. I think a third boy would have done me in though & I wasn't one of those women that "wanted to try for that girl". I bet you hear the same thing I do that boys are much easier?!
I am thankful for my boys. I just know how I was as a teenage girl and I don't know if I could handle another me!
Enjoy your day and just think of all the people who haven't even made it to 13 years. These days couples get divorced at the drop of a hat.
Hey, and just think, if you hadn't gotten married you wouldn't have your three wonderful boys! 
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~~~Lisa~~~
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Barbara,
My husband and I have been married nearly 19 years and they haven't all been easy. He almost left in 1996...changed his mind...almost left in 1999...changed his mind...I invited him the leave in 2000 and he wouldn't go (not his undying love for me but his ego) . He gave his life to Christ in 2001 and things have been uphill ever since.
In my husband I have my best friend...confidant...love of my life and every good thing in between. I love to hear his key turn the lock when he comes home.
Marriage is tough to say the least but boy am I ever glad I stuck it out...I love my husband more than ever.
I am sorry you're sad...prayer is great and so is counseling!
Hugs, Rachel
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Sis, you like SELL THIS HOUSE, too. I love that show. Also like MAKEOVER MAMA'S.
Slack not being cut....
Barbie
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AND --
#86834 - 07/06/04 11:43 AM
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Bevvy
Reged: 11/04/03
Posts: 5918
Loc: Northwest Washington State
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-- "Double Agents."
I like "Sell This House" because they tell you what the property values are in the area. "House Hunters" never does; they show you the buyers making an offer, but you don't know what the offer is. You also don't know what area they're looking in. "Double Agents" is terrific, but they don't give you values, and you watch for a solid hour in anticipation -- which house will the buyers choose!? -- only to have it end with the buyers changing their minds and staying where they were. I mean, it's like an hour's time totally wasted!
Except, of course, I do get a lot of decorating tips. For one thing, no wallpaper! For some reason, no one likes wallpaper anymore. I realize it's a personal thing, but isn't paint the same? I recall one episode of "Sell This House" in which they removed some great-looking striped wallpaper that I thought greatly improved the looks of the place. I guess a solid-colored wall is less personal than stripes, but far less charming too.
The thing that I fail to understand in all these programs is the total lack of creativity in all the buyers. When I'm house-shopping and walk into a prospective new home, the only thing I'm focusing on is live-ability. How many rooms are there? How big are they? Is the bedroom an ensuite? How far do I have to go from the bed to the toilet? How does the "flow" work to suit me (not from the toilet! Sheesh!).
Why, oh WHY, do people walk into a new home and focus solely on the wall colors or carpet colors? WHO CARES? That's the first thing I'm gonna change anyway! That's a given! I've never moved into a used home without ripping up the carpeting (I mean, do you really want to lie down on something a cat or dog has peed on?) and painting the walls (get real about those bright red walls, PUH-LEEZE!).
Hey, am I ranting, or WHAT!?
Sis
P.S.: Can't STAND "Makeover Mamas." No slack here!
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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20 years
#86848 - 07/06/04 12:19 PM
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Janey
Reged: 10/25/03
Posts: 1716
Loc: Maryland
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This Oct. will be 20 years for us. I love my guy more than anything. Honestly though, there are times when I don't know how I do it and then other times when I look at him and don't how I would live life without him. Our anniversaries are usually just another day for us. Sometimes we go out to dinner but most of the time we just spend it with our kids. Marriage definitely has its ups and down but the bottom line is, like Bev said, if you love them then you work it out.
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Janey
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Sis, it's true. I really don't understand on Sell This House why people are so interested in what kind of couch a person has or even wallpaper ( I like wallpaper, too). I do enjoy watching it for the decorating and updating tips for older homes. If I was buying a house I would be looking for the size of the rooms...how many bathrooms...if the kitchen is bright, etc. Don't care what kind of bedroom suit they have. After all, I would be bringing my own stuff, wouldn't I? BTW, how does that cute gal always look so good after stripping wallpaper or painting. Do you know what I look like after I paint?? You don't want to know.
Haven't seen "House Hunters" or "Double Agents"???
Sorry you don't like Makeover Mamas.....I get a kick out of it.
Barbie
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some of my favorite things about being married (in no particular order):
1. Having someone to spoon every night
2. Being able to ask for exactly what I need (like a hug, or even in the bedroom, hee hee) and know I'm going to get it
3. Having someone else to worry about car problems or household issues
4. Knowing he will share the duties around the house
5. Having someone I know will love me no matter what
6. Knowing he will be a great dad someday
7. Knowing he will pretty much do whatever I ask him because he trusts me and loves me
8. Knowing I make him as happy as he makes me
9. When he rolls over at night and murmurs that he loves me
10. Two words: physical labor
There are plenty more, but that's a start.
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Christine
Those who can do; those who want it done better teach.
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It comes down to the art of living on [color/red]
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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I am young, not married so am in no position to give advice!!! However, I know that it is not uncommon for couples to experience a few blips along the way. Just from your profession (a nurse I believe) and the way you seem to care for your 3 boys, who are adorable and sweet, yet at times may be a bit of a handful to deal with all by yourself, I can tell you're a person who puts others first.
This is a great quality but maybe you are not taking care of yourself enough. You need to make time for yourself and for you and your hubby to spend together. Could someone watch the kids while you have a date night? The movies? Dinner? Is there anyway you could get away for a weekend?
Sounds too me like any problems you may be experiencing now are completely normal. Stress can be a HUGE factor that effects all aspects of your mind/body/life as we here can ALL attest to. You seem like a wonderful woman and amazing mother, Barb. I wish you 13, another 13, another 13 and another couple 13's after that, more years of happy marriage.
Happy Anniversary, Barbara.
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It comes down to the art of living on [color/red]
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some made me laugh and cry. During my doctor's appt. my husband bought fresh flowers and was arranging them in the flower vase when I got home.
A couple of hours later my husband's family came and stayed until 7:30 last night. He played with the boys while I cleaned the kitchen, I put the boys to bed and he fell asleep.
I'm going to try to get a babysitter tonight, so we can at least go out to dinner than to Barnes and Noble to read. BTW that is a typical date for us.
I met with a couselor already about work a related issue, so that is my agenda today to call her again. Hopefully my husband will come at some point, but he isn't willing to get couseling. Our problems are not recent - it goes back a few years and he isn't willing to make any changes to make it better. My husband believes I am the one who comes from an abusive past, so therefore I need to deal with it and stop punishing him.
It is also time to make my hour and half drive to Milwaukee and spend a few days with my close friends who know what is going on.
Thanks for letting me vent. I do believe in marraige and feel too many people leave their marriages. We share three boys who need their mom and dad and I don't want them to experience a broken home.
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Hi Barbara,
Sounds like the flowers were a nice touch. Did you like them?
Hope your date to dinner and Barnes & Noble ( I love that place) is fun.
Maybe spending time with your friends will be helpful to you.
Have fun
Barbie
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Quote:
My husband believes I am the one who comes from an abusive past, so therefore I need to deal with it and stop punishing him.
Barbara, me too... {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
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Laura
Keep it simple!
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Hi Barb,
At first I didn't think that tehre was anything I could add to your post (not being married and all), but then I thought about it; My parents got divorced after 13 years of marriage. I can't say if it was for the best or not. I never saw them fight and I have no clue how they'd be together now. But boy, there were many many times that I wished they weren't divorced. Obviously it's not good to stay in a bad relationship just for the kids sake, but I was really glad to read that you are thinking of them and knowing how much of a difference it can make in their lives to have a Mom and Dad who are together, happy.
Good Luck and Happy Anniversary!
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Barb,
Hubby and I will be at the 16 year mark this Sept, and the last 5 years have really been a trial. He has had serious health problems that have kept him from working and I have been the sole income for 4 of those years. That role reversal has been a HUGE burden for us both, and resentment has threatened to split things wide open many times. Bottom line, if love is truly there, and I'd say after 13 years it is, then whatever it is at the root of the problem is worth sticking it out for in the long run. Children are precious, and the broken home will be something they have to battle the rest of their lives.
I am glad you have friends to talk with and a counselor who will help you. We all have room to grow and change. I think one of the key things to remember, is even though we do change, it is never our place to try to force the one we love to "fit" a mold of our own design. Love for a lifetime is tough. But I think, with God's mercy and grace, it is so very worth it all.
Hubby and I are still in an uphill battle sometimes. He has started back to school - me still working. And family opinion of him is at low ebb to say the least. That makes it really tough on me sometimes. But I love the man with all my heart and cannot imagine my world without him. Our boys always pray to grow up to be big and strong and smart like daddy. That makes it all worthwhile.
I hope you and your family thrive together. Hang in there! My prayers go with each of you as you go through this tough time.
Kim
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God is Faithful!
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Barbara, I disagree with Jamie. My parents, who (from the very beginning) obviously no longer loved each other, stayed together -- for us kids. As a result, it was not a happy time for any of us. I can honestly say that I came from a VERY dysfunctional family! All they ever did was argue, my mother constantly complaining about how miserable us kids made her life, blaming my father for wanting us as he did. She made his life a living hell, and us kids accepted the blame. She had some feelings for her eldest son (because "he was the first") and some for her youngest (because he was fathered by someone else), but she totally disliked me, and I'm sure it's because my father adored me.
My parents should have divorced when my younger brother was born and my father discovered he wasn't the father. I was 4 at the time. He had all right to kick her a** out of the house, but he didn't, unfortunately, and as a result we all went through hell while my mother drank herself into a drunken stupor every night.
While it would have been difficult at first going through a divorce, looking back on it now I think it would have been best for all of us kids. My younger brother grew up spoiled rotten, completely unable to make his way through life, not even knowing how to balance a checkbook. My older brother is an incredible success professionally but has no idea how to show love to his family. And, as you have all seen on the Boards, I'm a total mess.
We would all have fared much better had they separated and we went to live with my father who loved us all (thank God!).
Barbara, it's admirable to consider the children. I wish my parents had.
Bev
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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Barbara, I know you love those boys and you love your husband. I also understand the abusive past thing, and this is what I have to say on that....all you can do is the best you can do. I think so much of you for putting your kids first,they need to grow up with thier mom and dad.
Have a good date with him, and get on over to Milwaukee and get your soul and heart cleansed with your friends. I did the same last weekend and am ready for it again !!!
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Bev, I had a feeling there was some alcohol abuse in your family background. The devastation of families due to the disease of alcoholism is horrible. I know. There's a lot of it in my family too. One of my cousins is in the final stage of drinking himself to death. I had such a crush on him growing up and it just breaks my heart. That's just one of many stories.
My heart goes out to you sweetie. I KNEW there was a reason I liked you from the get go. We've got way more than IBS in common, girlfriend.
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
PS. Barbara, sorry to highjack your thread.
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Laura
Keep it simple!
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Hey Bev,
I tried to state in my post that staying in a bad relationship only for the kids was a bad idea, but giving it extra effort because of the kids is a good idea.
You're experience is a tough one, but you've proved that people can be put throuh hell and still conme out awesome (not that I'm recommending it
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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"We fall in love and out of love and back in again many times during married life. Learn to laugh and rent some comedies. Married many, many years here." Is this true?,because i wonder if im still in love with him,or im just going thru a phase right now? Sometimes i think i married too young or that maybe i married the wrong man? Marriage sure isnt the fairytale you think it will be.
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