Need to tell you
#71764 - 05/19/04 06:58 PM
|
|
|
|
tarabara04
Reged: 04/06/04
Posts: 442
Loc: Bay Area, California, USA
|
|
|
Hey all! Okay. So I really just need to tell you all this so you'll know what's going on right now. I don't want you to get mad that I haven't been responding to many posts. I love to make long responses. And I really like talking with you guys. I just haven't felt right lately. I've given a brief explanation but here's a whole one. Okay:
So, my headaches had been getting a lot better. My neurologist had added a second medicine to try to prevent them (b/c i get headaches every day plus i get migraines). So my pain was finally starting to be like only a 4 (1-10 pain scale) most days of the week, which was WONDERFUL!! It was like Heaven. I am still thankful for that. Then, I got a sinus infection that i'm almost done w/antibiotics for. But like since the middle of that, i started getting my wonderful old headaches again 6-9 pain EVERY DAY. And it's not just pain from my sinuses. Plus, I"m nauseous and SO tired it's not even funny. Well..actually, maybe it is  Anyhow, I guess I'm just frustrated right now perhaps cause I was finally like feeling significantly better and then BAM..i've really backtracked. Like...maybe it's cause I haven't had a day w/o a headache since August '03 and before then I've had headaches most days of the week since 8th grade. everything just got worse this past august! Anyhow, it's better to have a taste of relief and then agony again than having no relief at all it's just frustrating. Plus, I SO wanted to be able to show my neurologist progress cause she's SO nice and caring and understanding. And I don't want her to feel badly.  I wish I could just lie and say i was better..but then she wouldn't be able to help me. Plus, last time when i said i was okay when i wasn't feeling well, she was like "okay?" Anyhow...I mean, she told me it's a roller coaster and there are good days and bad days...I just wish I could have better news to bring (my appt is on tues.) Cause right now...i feel awful..headache, nauseous, tired, it's just frustrating. I was looking forward to being able to going to Senior Picnic and now I feel like I did a while back when I was pretty bad. I'm sorry for complaining guys, I just wanted to give you background info, kinda. And I hope this doesn't sound too negative or anything. Like right now there's a really pretty flower outside and I was thinking, if I could be a flower petal (or pollen, as allyou allergic people know), I could travel around the world. That'd be cool!  Anyhow, just had to let you guys know! Any advice on what to do at my appointment/how i should tell my dr. w/o making her feel bad ( i mean..i know she wouldn't show it but..) but to get me feeling better? Any other advice?! Thanks guys! Guess what?! my parents have been gardening in our front and back yards and it all looks so pretty and awesome!!!!! Hooray!
--------------------
If you live life to love, you'll love to live life.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Hey there, pretty lady!
You're very sweet to be concerned about your doctor. But trust me here, you're not doing yourself any favors by "sparing her feelings." She's there to do a job, and that's to try to help you. The best thing you can do for you -- and HER -- is to BE HONEST. If you're not better, TELL HER! And describe your pain as thoroughly as you possibly can. One of the things I admire so much about Jen and LS is that they can "narrow in" on the exact pain, where it comes from, where it goes, how long it lasts, etc. That helps the doctor immensely. And that's how YOU can help YOUR doctor.
The sooner you're honest about everything, the sooner the success -- and the sooner both of you will be happy.
Bev
--------------------
<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
.... you should admire me!
hee hee.... just kidding. anyway, you know how i feel about it. i still say you need to write out the laundry list and give it to her and throw yourself on her mercy. a) you're paying her, if you want me to be crude about it, so it's her job to take care of this stuff to the best of her ability; b) she seems like a great doctor from what you've told me, so i firmly believe she would want you to tell her everything. it's the only way she's going to have all the puzzle pieces to put together a cohesive pictures for you; c) you know when you're a doctor (and you will be!) you're going to want all the symptoms so you can help. that's why you're becoming a doctor, right!? RIGHT. so give your doctor some credit and treat her as you will want to be treated when you have patients!
i know you feel like you don't want to "trouble" her, or "act dramatic" or anything, but i think you'll be better served by getting a grip on the whole picture. as i've told you, i think there's more going on here and most of your stuff is all related. i don't have to get into that again with you, you know where i stand. here's the thing: prejudice against various illnesses often starts with the patient. make sure you're not falling into the "i don't want to be a burden, i don't want to complain, maybe i'm just being dramatic and hysterical and wimpy!" trap, please!
listen.... think about it this way. you know we love you and we know you love us.... and i know you are aware of the stuff that we all go through. what would you tell me if i were only planning to tell the doctor some of my symptoms, or worse--- shade the truth on some of them!? you'd yell at me, that's what you'd do! you'd do it nicely, 'cause that's your way, but i think you'd tell me "Jen, you are a great person and you are going through too much. you ought to tell this all to your doctor so that she can help you. you don't deserve to go through all this and your doctor can help you or help you find someone who can! you're great and totally worth taking some attention from that doctor. don't feel bad about it, you deserve to be as healthy as possible!" that's what you'd say to me.... or to Bevrs... or LS.....or Kandee.... or any of your other kajillion friends online. so that's what i say to you: "Tara, my dear, you are a great person and you are going through too much. you ought to tell this all to your doctor so that she can help you. you don't deserve to go through all this and your doctor can help you or help you find someone who can! you're great and totally worth taking some attention from that doctor. don't feel bad about it, you deserve to be as healthy as possible! " and i'd add: "you don't have to be in pain or not get sleep or suffer any of these things you are suffering through, sweets! so.... tell your doctor the whole shebang. suck it up and tell her. you may be amazed at the results!" oh yeah, and: "SMOOCHES!"
--------------------
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
You've just gotta tell her everything. Good luck honey!
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
Re: Honey Tara
#71852 - 05/20/04 07:35 AM
|
|
|
|
|
gigi
Reged: 03/21/04
Posts: 1442
Loc: South Texas
|
|
|
 Hi Sweet Tara!
You have been given the best advice. Be honest with your doc, she needs it to get you better! I want your headaches to leave!!! My nephew suffered with migraines, he had one for over a year, he was 9 at the time. One thing he was taught by his doc, dont keep anythin tucked away inside!! Tell it all, get it out, and honey he did. We can't tell him any secrets, because he is afraid he will get the migraines back, so HE TELLS ALL!!  Something you should do too, keeping things in will only hurt you more. Get with your best confidant, spill it, spew it, get rid of it!!
I am praying for you!
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Tara, you're just like me when I was younger, thinking about other people's feelings to the neglect of my own. I have two life lessons to share with you:
1. Take care of yourself first. That means make sure your own physical, mental and spiritual needs are met first, before worrying about others. It's like they say on airplanes, put your own oxygen mask on before assisting others. Because if you pass out, you can't help anyone!
2. What other people think of us is none of our business. Now, this may seem a little harsh, but for those of us who have a highly developed sense of empathy and who want everyone to think well of us -- we have a tendency to go overboard trying to make a good impression and make sure people like us. But other people can actually sense when we're doing this and unconsciously they can tell they're kinda being manipulated by us to get them to like us. And unconsciously that makes them annoyed. So we end up with the opposite effect. We're trying to please them and instead we're p---ing them off! The only cure for this downward cycle is to make worrying about what other people think of us strictly off limits, the same way trigger foods are strictly off limits for IBS.
So say what you MEAN, MEAN what you say, just don't say it MEAN, and you'll be fine!
--------------------
Laura
Keep it simple!
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Okay..yes, it will only hurt matters if I don't spill all the details about the pain, etc. And who needs more hurt (pain..lol)? I will tell her exactly what's going on. Funny thing is, she'd kinda be able to tell anyway. But I won't leave it to that! Thanks for the talk.
--------------------
If you live life to love, you'll love to live life.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
Thanks Jen
#71907 - 05/20/04 09:24 AM
|
|
|
|
|
tarabara04
Reged: 04/06/04
Posts: 442
Loc: Bay Area, California, USA
|
|
|
Yes..and you know you are admired..haha!
Quote:
i still say you need to write out the laundry list and give it to her and throw yourself on her mercy. a) you're paying her, if you want me to be crude about it, so it's her job to take care of this stuff to the best of her ability
This had me laughing. Thanks so much! You really know how to explain things!
Quote:
b) she seems like a great doctor from what you've told me, so i firmly believe she would want you to tell her everything. it's the only way she's going to have all the puzzle pieces to put together a cohesive pictures for you
See..i guess i was thinking it would get more confusing if I told her everything b/c then it's like not starting from scratch but, a setback, let's put it that way. But now that you put it that way, she NEEDS everything. And of course I would want EVERYTHING a patient had to say when i'm a dr. Maybe i'll tell them that when they come in (when i'm a dr.).
Quote:
"i don't want to be a burden, i don't want to complain, maybe i'm just being dramatic and hysterical and wimpy!" trap, please!
boy is this familiar.
Quote:
"Jen, you are a great person and you are going through too much. you ought to tell this all to your doctor so that she can help you. you don't deserve to go through all this and your doctor can help you or help you find someone who can! you're great and totally worth taking some attention from that doctor. don't feel bad about it, you deserve to be as healthy as possible!" that's what you'd say to me.
You BET I would
Thanks so much Jen. I'm still working up the guts kind of but I'm going to make a complete list, okay? And then I'll just hand it to her. Last time I did that just for a couple things and she answered everything.
Ok..thank you! YOu rock!
thanks for the smooches!
here are some fluffy hugs so they don't hurt you!
--------------------
If you live life to love, you'll love to live life.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Quote:
1. Take care of yourself first
Always have had trouble with this. I still don't know if i'd do that on an airplane before i'd put it on my kids or somethin(when i'm older and have kids). Well..I would i guess if they say that then you'd be able to help more people.
Quote:
What other people think of us is none of our business
Yeah, I suppose I just don't want people to think i'm whimpy or a pain. But like you said, it's none of our business. Plus, if they do, they just haven't gone through this.
Thanks LS, you're awesome! HOpe you're feeling better!
--------------------
If you live life to love, you'll love to live life.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Thanks Gigi! I"m sorry for your nephew! Well, I will tell her everything. I guess not doing so can only make things worse. Thanks for the advice. Yes, I don't hold things in...I have written all of this down many times, but I suppose the only way to completely get better is to show the full list.
~Thanks so much! I hope you are doing well!
--------------------
If you live life to love, you'll love to live life.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
Posts
