what to do with dating
#276537 - 07/31/06 10:37 PM
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I have been single for about 8 months now and have only gone out on one date. I get so nervous to meet new people having IBS because I don't know if your going to have to suddenly run to the restroom. And some people just don't understand or when to really tell someone that you do have IBS. I would be so much easier if you dated someone with the same thing. So any advise on the dating factor of have IBS and trying to go on on dates?
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Try meeting people in places where you feel comfortable or online so you can explain your ibs first. When you meet the right person you will know it and your ibs won`t be important. They will accept you for you, (even if they don`t understand ibs = speaking from my experience)> Sorry I haven`t really got any more advice but you aren`t alone in feeling like that. Good Luck. Hugs.
Jo xx
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http://www.myspace.com/jo_elsmere
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Thank you so much for the advice. Thats what I thought I should do. If they can't except that I have IBS then they are not for me.
Celeste
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Don't know if it's of any interest, but I know an IBS sufferer got sick of struggling with the same worries and actually set up an agency or something specialising in introducing you to others with IBS. From memory it's called www.irritatedbeingsingle.com, but if that's not spot on Google it.
HTH! Jo's advice is spot on 
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http://ibsblondie13.blogspot.com/
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I know for myself, that if I try to keep my IBS a "secret" the anxiety and worry about having to pass myself off as "normal" grates on my nerves. Like, what will he think when I ask the watier about every little ingredient? what will happen if I get pain and have to grin and bear my way through it? How will he react(god forbid)if I have an attack?
So, to just bypass all my "what ifs" from the beginning I just tell my date, "Look, I have some digestive issues that require me to eat a certain way, other wise I get sick." Leave it at that and expand on it later. Most people, if they think of IBS as a disease, are very understanding, even if they don't quite get it.
I have never had a guy get grossed out by my descriptions of symptoms, never had a guy turn me down or have a miserable time on a date because of my eating requirements and never had a guy freak out because I had symptoms or an attack. Remember, they're out with you because they LIKE you and they'll be willing to help you through whatever ails you. And if they don't, well c'est la vie!
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