I CAN'T BELIEVE WHATS JUST HAPPENED...
#262512 - 05/09/06 11:25 AM
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Natalie1985
Reged: 08/09/04
Posts: 1329
Loc: UK - Leeds for uni, Merseyside for home!
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as if all this defering uni business hasnt been stressful enough...now my flatmate who is pregnant has just walked through the door blind drunk having downed a whole bottle of wine. Considering she has the worst morning sickness(not even morning....throughout the whole day) and hasnt drank in weeks and weeks....she has suddenly decided she needs to have fun....thats what she said....I AM SO MAD AND SCARED AND I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO...she has an abortion booked for a week today....and I just sed to her what the **** dya think ur doin its not funny ur pregnant for gods sake and she sed well its dead anyways or its gona be dead in a week....I just burst out crying Ive just had to come to my room...Id started to get angry and my other flatmate said just leave it let her sober up. Shes in the kitchen nearly chopping off her fingers trying to cut potatoes to make some food....she can hardly stand straight. Im so upset....I dont know what to do??? Why is she doing this???...I just told her stop trying to pretend things arent happening...and she said well its gona be dead soon and she wants to have fun. Shes gone crazy....Im so scared...I cant believe shes being like this...this is aweful...Im shaking like mad I cant even type properly...she needs to speak to someone professional...this boyfriend situation has messed her up so much...what am I meant to do? what she said has just upset me so much....how could she say that????
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 Natalie
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All I have to say is that she's obviously not heandling this well. Getting drunk while she's pregnant (abostion or not) is a DUMB thing to do.
Maybe she's really afraid of having the abortion and got to drunk to deal with it??? 
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shes just admitted that to my friend now...Im still in my room I cant see her like this Im crying my eyes out right now...I just cant watch her do this....its too much for me to cope with right now. My other flatmate just came in and said shes had a word with her shes dealing with her better than I can right now...Im staying away until she sobers up. We're gona have to take her to a counsellor tomorrow at uni she really needs to speak to someone. Please send me some hugs...I really need them right now.
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Natalie
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I'm sorry you are put in this situation Natalie. You are trying to be a good friend and I know you care about her but maybe its time you separate yourself from the situation a bit. You can't let her bad decisions and messed up life ruin yours. If she isn't going to take responsibility for her actions, you shouldn't either. I hope I don't sound too harsh. I know its tough when a friend is suffering but this girl isn't even trying to help herself. I won't even comment on the getting drunk or abortion. Big hugs to you though!!
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Taking it one day at a time.....
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I know I have to separate myself...its just hard to do when you live together and its so intense....we've all been through so much together over the past 3 years and we care about each other like sisters. It just upset me the way she came in....it was such a shock...and what she said...well I dont even want to talk about that....she knows she wrong she knows shes not done the right thing...shes just looking for a way out. Im glad Im not about to finish my uni work now otherwise I think I would have had a breakdown....Im calming myself down now....it was just so sudden and a shock to the system....I know my main priority at the minute is me.
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Natalie
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This young lady is having a very difficult time coping with the decisions she has made. I tend to be like you, I'd have a tough time dealing with it that closely. However, you are a gem to be concerned. If she is this upset now, next week might bring on some pretty desperate behaviour. Getting her to talk to someone might prevent other more harmful actions in the future.
Please know I'm sending love and prayers for all of you. This is really an awful thing to have to cope with on such a personal level.
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God is Faithful!
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I'm sorry you're caught in the middle of this. It is her problem and life though, one that she has to make the decisions about. It might help you to just mentally divorce yourself from the situation.
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UPDATE...
#262543 - 05/09/06 03:38 PM
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Natalie1985
Reged: 08/09/04
Posts: 1329
Loc: UK - Leeds for uni, Merseyside for home!
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Im really sorry if anyone was upset by what I posted about what my flatmate said when she was drunk about the pregnancy etc...when I read it back before I felt so ashamed that she'd said that I felt embarrassed cos its the most aweful thing you could say....especially when I know how desperately some people are trying to get pregnant and it just makes it seem all the more unfair when people liek my friend talk about their situation like its nothing, when so many others would give anything to be pregnant like her right now. It really really upset me...shes one of my best friends and to hear her say like that and behave like that was horrible for me to watch and I just couldnt take it. I couldn't help but break down. Shes apologised to me cos she knew I was upset...I said there was no need to and Im just worried about her state of mind etc...we're gona go to see the uni counsellor with her tomorrow. I have an appointment anyways about defering so we're all going to go. I think we all maybe need to talk to someone about the whole situtation and how its affecting us all too. We all need to come to terms with the abortion next week...she has no one here and so all 4 of us are going with her...she has asked us to come if we are able...and I couldnt not be there for her...Id have gone anyways. Its going to be a tough week so please keep us in your thoughts. Im waiting for my tutors to contact me tomorrow too about my uni situation so hopefully I can sort that all out properly too. Its one of my flatmates 21st 2moro too which is so horrible for her cos we cant even celebrate it properly. We're going to go the cinema and for a meal i think tomorrow cos no one is up for any heavy partying right now, not with all the stress....we'll make it up to her in the summer....poor things got to go see the counsellor on her 21st....talk about a birthday she'll never forget. 
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Natalie
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sometimes pot lucks are fun too... don't know if you have time to organize something like that before her bday though. everyone bring their favorite food (and you make sure you make something you can eat!) and no one has to spend too long cooking for everyone. there is bright side to everything!
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At least I've learned a lot about my
body...
IBS-A and still figuring things out
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You really need a break from all this don`t you? I feel so sorry for you huni....I don`t know what to say to make you happier but at least it will be over for this year soon and you`ve got rid of some of the stress by deferring. Just think you have an extra summer to be a student!!!! I LOVE THE SUMMER! Keep smiling huni and hope u have a lovely time celebrating ur friend`s 21st...just try to enjoy and forget even if its just for that night.
BIG HUGS, thinking of you and your flat mates
mwah
Jo x
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http://www.myspace.com/jo_elsmere
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