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its all a bit a confusing really...NO she definately DID NOT want to get pregnant...she was just stupid and lied about it before to scare her boyfriend, who was acting like an a*** at the time....I think it was a very stupid and aweful thing to do and something Id never think of doing no matter how much of an a*** my boyfriend was....but her mind works in mysterious ways sometimes and she has often lied over things in the past for very pointless reasons...I think thats issues within herself that she needs to deal with. Shes had a hard upbringing...I shouldnt really be talking about it but her dad beat her mother badly when she was a child and then her mum basically drank herself to death and so when she was 9 her sister who was 10 years older adopted her. I think everything thats happened to her has never been openly discussed(shes mentioned it to us as her friends bt not in the greatest detail of how its affected her) and I know deep down shes bottling a lot of stuff up and thats the reason she deals so badly with relationships...she gets very jealous and behaves irratically. She becomes very dependant on people and she is very insecure. The thing is you can only tell people to go and get help....them actually doing it is another thing. I took her to a counsellor a couple of months back but she would have had to wait a few hours for an appointment and she ended up saying we'd go the day after and then she did a runner for 3 weeks. Very confusing the whole saga I know. Thing is...thats another thing Im worried about...if she does decide to keep it...I think she needs to resolve her issues before....otherwise it could impact upon how she deals with the baby. I dont know whats for the best really. She's still 50/50 as to what to do....its just aweful that theres a timer ticking away for 10 days until she has to make a final decision 
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 Natalie
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I am REALLY REALLY worried about my friend right now...she doesnt seem to know what shes doing or thinking for that matter. She is behaving very irrational and dealing with things in a very bizarre way....we all just dont know what to say to her. Shes really only thinking about herself in the matter...I dont even think shes considered the baby...not really....it always comes down to how painful the termination might be or the birth for that matter or money and things like that...and I suppose yea....obviously shes gona think about these things....but when she thinks about the fact of keeping it...she seems to be treating it more like an object we feel....we are worried that shes gona make her decision based upon the wrong reasons.
Today was aweful...cos she aparently woke up and had decided she wanted to keep the baby and try and make things work with her boyfriend....now after the way hes treated her and based upon what we know...he doesnt want her...and theres NO WAY he wants a baby....though she seems to think that some how she can CONVINCE him to sort thing out..FOR THE BABYS SAKE  Like thats gona be the most sensible thing to do when its quite obvious that the relationship has been dying a slow death and she is clingin on to hope that they will get back together. I think this time it is final but she wont accept that.
Yesterday she wanted nothing to do with him...now she is begging him back. She borrowed my flatmates phone to ring him and then I heard her crying and screaming and begging for him to come back and saying Im sorry and Ill change and all this. She even lied saying her sister would buy them a house and they could work things out and a load of other crap and pointless arguments. Its like we keep telling her...this is not about him and her anymore....its about the fact that theyve created a baby and they need to decide what to do about it. She even tried to get another friend to ring him and convince him to get back with her. Its just getting ridiculous now....like shes going to keep the baby to try and trap him or something....but she really upset my other flatmate by some of things shes was saying on the phone to him....we could hear everything through the walls...my flatmate just feels so aweful for the baby...cos she feels like theyre not even considering it as a baby...its like it an object thats being played and manipulated with. And if she decides on keeping it then its aweful that theyre treating it like this. What kind of a child would want to be born into so much hate?
Whats made it worse is that there was a programme on tv last night all about pregnancy and abortion and birth and all the related topics...and everything just hit home more. The last thing we heard was her begging and crying and then he put the phone down. Then my other flatmate was just returning back after easter with her dad and so we had to conceal everything from him and while we were in the kitchen she replaced my flatmates phone in her room and left the house. We havent seen her since. We are convinced shes gone to see him but I am scared for her....cos we have bad feelings that he will force her into having an abortion and say if she does they can get back together and then dump her afterwards. It wouldnt surprise me the way he is. Either that or he'll treat her even worse than he already has and she'll slit her wrists or something(cos she has in the past) or worse do something terrible.
She hasnt come back yet....its getting late and her only other girlfriend hasnt heard from her either. If shes not back tomorrow I will be terrified...I am praying so hard that she doesnt do something stupid. Please keep her in your thoughts....this is so hard for me right now having to see her go through it....I just dont know what else we can do....
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Natalie
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Is she back yet? Hope everything's ok.
From what you've said, both on here and email, it's pretty obvious she has some problems going back a while, and, unfortunately, pregnancy tends to compound all that - even without problems it can do funny things to your mind!
I think she needs to see a counseller, and asap?
C x
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http://ibsblondie13.blogspot.com/
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Her boyfriend has told her he doesnt love her and that he hates her now after the way shes dealing with this situation!! I mean can u believe it...the way shes dealing with it?? Just dont get me started on him!! Anyways...we had more talks this morning and it looks like she is going to have to face the harsh reality that their relationship is well and truly over....and about time if you asked any of us...been heading that way since day1!! So as for the pregnancy situation...I think its more likely that she will have an abortion...though shes still not entirely sure...will keep you posted...I just feel aweful the way this is getting discussed...it makes me so sad....Ive spoken to her about the choice of adoption...but she doesnt seem to be giving that a second thought...I think its sad really...cos its like its the option thats least discussed in these situations...and there are so many people out there who would love a baby and cant. I keep thinking of you michele....and how much you desperately want to be a mother...it breaks my heart....I wish things didnt work out the way that they do....lifes just so unfair.
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Natalie
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Thanks Natalie. I hope your friend finds peace in whatever decision she makes. It definitely sounds like she has some under laying problems and issues she needs to get sorted out. You can only do so much for her and weather she realizes it or not, your a great friend! 
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Taking it one day at a time.....
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Aw Nat, I wish there was something i could do huni, hope ur ok. And I know what you mean about life being unfair...Michelle u r so understanding even after everything you`ve been through.What a star. Nat if you want a chat to share the burden just email/txt me. Wish I could do more.
BIG HUGS to both of you 
Jo xx
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http://www.myspace.com/jo_elsmere
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I dont know whats changed inside of her to make up her mind...she went and saw her boyfriend the other day and that is well and truly over now and he wants nothing to do with her....im not even going to get started on him again...but anyways...she told us this morning that she has decided to go though with the termination and she will not be keeping the baby. I have to say...as much as I'll support her Ive said that all the way and I do believe in pro-choice....but still a small part of me feels like Im already grieving for her baby....I know it might sound weird...but we all feel like that in the flat. Its kind of strange cos this last week I think we've maybe got strangely used to her being pregnant...shes been having weird cravings and we've been getting her some different foods to what she usually has and she's lost weight too...cos of all the morning sickness....when she told me this morning she actually looked better than Ive seen her in a long time. So shes booked in for May 16th....what will be the worst day ever for all of us.....I'll keep u all updated...gosh this has been such a drama
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Natalie
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Good luck Nat, if you or she has any more questions or just want to stress out you know where I am. It IS a sad time - even when you (and she) think it's the right decision, there will be a period of grieving. It might not hit her til afterwards, or maybe even quite a bit in the future (as it did me), but it will happen.
All you can do is be there for her and hold her hand. Is someone (you / her sister / other friend) going with her? Definitely easier than going alone.
Thinking bout you all, and big hugs x
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http://ibsblondie13.blogspot.com/
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Well, I'm glad she has made a decision. I can't imagine having to wait almost 4 weeks though after having made a decision like that. I hope things start to calm down and everything goes well! Hugs and Love
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Taking it one day at a time.....
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Oh no, that's so sad. 
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