OK, it's time to admit that I need help and I don't know what to do....
#252912 - 03/18/06 11:32 AM
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Alyson McG
Reged: 05/20/05
Posts: 317
Loc: Vancouver Washington (IBS-A, but D prominant)
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I am beginning to realize that I have a very serious problem with food. Actually, I've always known but it's extended into something more. I have been bulimic (not admitted easily) for almost 22yrs, right after the birth of my oldest daughter. It's been better since my IBS started, ironic isn't it? I've spent the past 18 months getting the IBS under control but now I can't stop thinking about food! I wake up thinking about what I'll eat that day, not just my first meal, but the whole day. Sometimes I even start thinking about the next day's meals. I constantly want to eat. I have gained 20 pounds in the past 18 months, which puts me at 145(I'm 5'5) not terribly bad, but I'm afraid of it getting worse. Obviously, my weight has always been a struggle and fear for me. Does anyone else go through anything like this? Do you know of anything (web sites, books, support groups etc..) that can help with something like this? I'm at a cross roads about my weight. At times I can accept a few extra pounds, but then I start to worry about what if I can't stop gaining?? I would really like to learn to accept me at whatever weight I am at, but also don't want to be unhealthy. That's the main reason I want to get it under control. I'm 41 and know I need to stay healthy.  I'm beginning to feel insane about it. I would just like to stop thinking about food every, and I do mean EVERY, minute of the day! Arggghhhhhh....... Any input is greatly appreciated, more than you guys will every know.
Alyson
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Everything in life happens for a reason, patience will eventually tell us what that is......
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I can't offer advice because I'm in that same position. ihave TRIED to be bulimic but can't make myself throw up. But it's on my mind all the time, and with SAD, I pack on ten pounds every winter, and usually lose five in the summer. but all I want to do all winter is eat and sleep.
I'd love to hear everyone's take on this. I am currently not on the IBS diet much at all, and my IBS is fine... but it's time to get something started...
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I know it's worse in the winter for me too.  Thanks at least for understanding. It would help to know I'm not the only one and not just absolutely crazy.
Alyson
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Everything in life happens for a reason, patience will eventually tell us what that is......
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http://www.myspace.com/jo_elsmere
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Have you considered Weight Watchers? Hold on -- hold on -- before you say no, let me argue my case.
I'm 5'6". When I turned 40, I wanted to lose 25 pounds. At the time, I weighed 145. Like you said, "not bad," but I wanted to look GOOOOOOD, ya know?
I lost the weight and got down to a size 6. It was fun while it lasted. Needless to say, as soon as I quit WW, I gained it all back -- and more.
In your neck of the woods down there, I'd suspect there is a real good WW Center. (There isn't up here.) If you get a good lecturer, someone who takes an interest in all the folks who come to her "classes," she can be of INCREDIBLE help and support. Back in the 80's, when I first joined, that's what I had -- a fabulous lecturer who helped me every step of the way.
It's not about losing the weight for you, it's really about losing the obsession with food. I'm on WW now, and the thing I like best about it is that I no longer feel guilt every time I eat something. I keep a food journal, so I know everything I put in my mouth, and it keeps me on track without making me obsess. And I'm losing.
WW groups also provide fantastic support. You meet folks who have the same issues as you do -- problems with food -- and that kind of support is imperative.
Check it out; go to WeightWatchers.com and see about classes in your area.
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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and you're right. My first thought was WW? I've done so many diets, which I think has only increased my obsession. I did Herbalife 4 years ago and got down to a comfortable 125, then lost 10 more when my ex cheated and walked out. I was pretty thin but felt great! Especially since I had done it W/O binge and purge. Then when my current hubby and I started dating I put on 10 pounds, which was still fine. He can eat anything and snacks all the time, making it twice as bad for me because all I have to do is look at food and it's instantly on my a.. It's all just spun out of control and worse yet, my hubby has no idea. He just hates seeing me worry about my weight all the time and tells me it doesn't matter to him. That's been helpful to some degree, but still i keep thinking about it. Sorry I'm rambling... Thanks for the suggestion, I'll check out the website right now.
Alyson
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Everything in life happens for a reason, patience will eventually tell us what that is......
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you are DEFINITTELY not alone. My sister is in the same boat too, and just got diagnosed with IBS...and there are a ton of us out there.
Plus, has your winter not been bizarre this year? I find the west coast and this western part of the world, lol...is just OFF KILTER!! My winter had been utterly brown, dry and drab and depressing until Feb. 28.Now we have so much snow we can't function, all in the matter of 18 days!It's made me feel sort of lost!
]Hugs. I bet when the sun really starts to shine again(aka, spring on the Coast) we will feel better.
Sniff...I miss my Vancouver. i haven't been back in a while. My nana lives in vancouver BC....so pretty!!
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ah,it's a struggle.
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Keep on keepin' on...
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although it might be slightly different for me...cos Im on a healthy eating streak at the moment...I havent had sugar now for 52 days and thats a record for me! Im still eating ALOT of food though which is why I am not losing anymore weight....I really need to portion control but when I try doing that all I think about is food.....before I gave up sugar all I could think about was chocolate and when was I gona next eat and that...infact all of us in this house(thats my 2 flat mates included) have had OBSESSIONS with food...it was becoming VERY unhealthy and was all we'd think about....it was like we were living to eat!! I have to say...giving up the sugar has banned all my cravings for anything bad...I only eat healthy food now....I just need to increase my exercise and portion control a little and the weight should come off. Ive done this VERY gradually...I knew that if I went on some major diet it'd only end in disaster. My change of eating is a lifestyle change for me.....Ive had to accept that getting off the extra 20lbs Id like is gone take time and so Im tryng to do things gradually. Since Ive eaten healthy I really dont want to eat crap anymore...so to me thats a huge step!
I know you will do it....and whatever way you choose we'll be here to support you.... 
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 Natalie
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How did you ever find a way to get away from sugar???? I love it sooooo much and I know if I can get away from it, I won't want it as much, but I just can't find a way to do it this time...
Alyson
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