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Oh sweetie!
#215948 - 09/26/05 12:23 PM
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RachelT
Reged: 07/01/04
Posts: 2350
Loc: Minnesota
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I have to say I agree with Bev 100%!! Your happiness comes first! You need to take care of you! Put the fertility issue up on the shelf, just for a while at least. Love & hugs hon!!!!
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~ Rachel (IBS-C)
If life hands you lemons, make lemonade!!
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Hi Michele,
I am so sorry that this is happening to you. You sound like you would be a wonderful mother but remember that being a mother doesn't always mean giving birth to a child.
My Grandparents have 5 children. My Grandma gave birth to two of her children and adopted her other three. My Grandma was very sick during both of her pregnancies and her doctor told her that she was not able to have any more babies. Her and my Grandpa desperately wanted a large family and so they chose adoption (1 girl and 2 boys). My Aunt was also unable to become pregnant and she adopted a baby from Guatemala.
There are a lot of babies and children without parents so if adoption is something you've thought about before maybe it's worth investigating?
Jenn
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Michele
#215954 - 09/26/05 12:48 PM
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BL
Reged: 06/01/03
Posts: 3522
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I know this must be exhausting for you---and it is difficult on a marriage. (I remember all too well!) Personally, I think it's time for you to back off and take a break. I'm not saying you should never try again, but for now, honey, you need to not be trying so hard. You are physically and mentally drained, and I don't think it's worth it for you to feel like you don't want to go on.
I know you probably don't want to hear this, but maybe you should look into adoption. That's not saying you have to give up trying to get pregnant. You may end up with babies both ways, like a good friend of mine did. She tried for years to get pregnant, couldn't, adopted two beautiful children----and then ended up getting pregnant twice. Now she has 4 precious children and she couldn't be happier!
I think right now you are so caught up with trying to "make a baby" that you forget that your ultimate goal is to be a mother. Whether you carry that baby in your tummy or get it from someone else who cannot parent a child, there is no difference. In the end, you will have a family! You will be the one to care and love that child, tuck it into bed at night, help them with their homework, and (hopefully, see them off to college!)
My heart hurts for you because I know what you're going through. It is devastating month after month to try so hard and not be able to do what every other woman in the world seems to do so naturally. I don't know why some women have to suffer like this.
But I think it's time for you to take a break. Regroup.....go on that vacation. Do all those things with your husband that you will not be able to do once a baby comes into your life. Laugh again, enjoy your husband and the relationship you two have, and see where life takes you.
Life is too short for you to be so upset about this all the time. I'm confident that things will work up for you (one way or the other) in the long run, but right now, you need to get yourself over this hump.
We've all followed you through this journey, and we'll be here for you, no matter what. You're gonna make it! Hang in there.
((((Big hug))))
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I've been thinking for a while that the RE isn't helping you. Correct me if I'm wrong but you had no problem getting pg before you saw her but you have not gotten pg since you have seen her.
Personally, if it was me I think I would stop with the RE and everything that goes with that and enjoy some time with my husband. Remember Kerrie (KinOZ)? She went through several rounds of IVF for a year and even though she did get pg one time with twins from IVF, she miscarried them. She ended up deciding she had had enough and even started looking into adoption. Now she has a 5 month old little boy without any medical help. Maybe a little break, as hard as that is, would be good for both of you. Don't you have a trip coming up with your husband's family? You were worried about flying maybe that would be enough of a break for the two of you? Just thinking out loud. Just don't give up all together. ((((hugs)))
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awww michele honey! I feel so terrible that you have to go through this day in and day out.
I agree with what Bev has said as well. I also think you should sit down with your doctor and ask them realistically what the chances are without sugarcoating it. Maybe that will help you decide whether or not to keep trying, or to start saving for adoption.
Good luck honey. we love you.
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Thanks Ashley. I did talk to the Re and will post a full update. I just wish no one had to go through this kind of heartache.
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Taking it one day at a time.....
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Hi Torbetta! Yeah, I remember Kerrie and I was so happy when I heard she finally had a baby!!
The problem is, with my hormonal imbalance, if I did get pregnant without any "drugs" or assistance, my chances of miscarring are great. I got pregnant the first time the 2nd month. Miscarried and got pregnant again right away and miscarried again. We took a month off last August and didn't get pregnant until December, it was five months of trying that time only to miscarry once again.
They are trying to stimulate the follicular growth and balance things out. For some reason, my body is now spitting out the eggs before they are mature, which is very rare with the drugs I'm already on. I'll post a full update below.
I am scheduled to go to Lake Tahoe for a week between x-mas and New years. We did take a little get-a-away weekend back in July but could definitely use a little more time away.
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Taking it one day at a time.....
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Re: Thanks BL
#215976 - 09/26/05 02:17 PM
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michele
Reged: 06/02/03
Posts: 6886
Loc: southeastern michigan
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I would love to adpot a baby but we just can't afford it unless we adopt an older child that has been in the "system" for a while. With so many needy babies and childern out there, I don't know why they have to make it so expensive!
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Taking it one day at a time.....
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