frustrated, sad, stupid weight ugh!
#213789 - 09/16/05 05:25 AM
|
|
|
|
|
caths
Reged: 07/14/05
Posts: 54
Loc: TX and MA
|
|
|
as i have said before, last year i think went through a minor case of anorexia or some kind of eating disorder. i've recently gained a ton of weight back...it began with getting on heather's diet and really kicked in when i started birth control. i'm kinda freaking out about it because i've gained well over 10 pounds in the matter of 2 months. i started exercising and eating better last week but fell back into my bad routine of overeating. i know it's not unusual for people recovering from eating disorders to tend to overeat as a form of compensation but it really sucks and i'm trying really hard to get over it. i can't fit into any of my clothes anymore and i'd hate to buy a new wardrobe. and it's so hard hard thinking about/seeing pics from when i was so petite and then seeing myself now. i know i'm not fat but i'm afraid of how long this overeating will continue. i'm also thinking that it's a subconscious emotional thing...i'm in australia right now studying, very far from my bf in houston, i've read that overeating can be a way to fill a void...maybe i'm trying to fill that void. i don't really know, but it sucks and i hate this behavior but i can't seem to stop! i told myself that it's okay and i'll lose it eventually but for now i should be happy that i'm not in this awful cycle of obsessing over what i eat and how little/healthy i should eat because when i think about it, that was a miserable way to live life. but now i'm in australia and in a swimsuit all the time (even a wetsuit last weekend  ) so i just wish i could be as confident in my body as i was at the beginning of the summer! ack! i don't know what i'm looking for, but it just feels better to write things down. thanks for listenin 
--------------------
.:IBS.:.C:...:pain.bloating.gas:.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
Caths
#213808 - 09/16/05 07:25 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
First....congratulations on beating the anorexia. I dealt with it off and on for over 20 years! I too put on weight with Heathers Diet and I think it is because I have always been a healthy eater...low fat and the like. Integrating the "white bread" (I ate very little bread before) and more sugar helped me to pack on the pounds...I was an "Equal" fanatic for years not realizing it was torturing my gut.
I have found that using Xylitol and Stevia helped me to reduce my refined sugar intake and I have yet to solve the IF/SF balancing without gaining a few pounds but am continuing to work on it.
I say all of this to say that you are not alone...I am happy that you are healthy and come here to vent anytime.
Hugs,
--------------------
Have a blessed day!...Rachel
stable and sooooooo thankful!
I have IBS but it doesn't have me!
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
I've never been on the anorexic side, but have been qwuite small before. I OBSESS like mad about my weight, and don't really overeat, but don't really exercise and don't really try to make anything better.
And I obsess about that too. it's hard to shut your brain up once it gets going.
Is there anything you can do to keep yourself busy? Like swimmin in the ocean every day? I don't know...it's all about not worrying about it, right? Like I can give advice!
but I'm there with you. I haven't lost anything in the last 4 months, but haven't gained either. i've been 185 lbs for a year now. Bleah. 
--------------------
Keep on keepin' on...
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
Re: Caths
#213988 - 09/17/05 01:35 AM
|
|
|
|
|
caths
Reged: 07/14/05
Posts: 54
Loc: TX and MA
|
|
|
thanks for the support gals  i dont know if i'd consider myself healthy now...i did beat my anorexia but i'm still struggling with the emotional affects of weight gain and i'm eating very badly! i'm on chinese herbal medicine that controls my IBS to a miraculous degree so i kind of went crazy with the unsafe foods when i realized i could. bad idea because it's back! not bad, but still back. i was even eating candy bars and peanut butter to the max! but of course that leads to me gaining even more weight and my ibs symptoms coming back. anyways, i've been good so far today, but it's the nights that really get me. here's hopin... just gotta break the cycle right? thanks again :-)
--------------------
.:IBS.:.C:...:pain.bloating.gas:.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
Posts
