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I'm on an emotional roller coaster. I feel like I should just break up with him. If after this long and all we've been through he's not sure if he wants a future with me then I just don't see what the point is. I've lost all faith, trust and security in our relationship because he just can't seem to make up his mind about us.
In my opinion - you answered your own vent!!! Your heart knows what's best - follow it!!
((BIG HUGSSS)))
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Lana_Marie
Proud Mommy to Bentley Taylor
Born May 12, 2004 9lbs, 3oz
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Kimm, I know this hurts to think about, but what if you marry him, and he decides later that he doesn't want to be married?
To me....that would be worse than anything.
Although there are no guarantees with any marriage, you at least want to marry someone who tells you up front that they are madly in love with you---and know for sure that they want to spend the rest of their life with you. If he's doubting that now, my question is how will he feel later? Marriage is a huge commitment.
You're the only one who can decide if this relationship is worth taking that chance, but if it were me, I'd RUN, not walk, away from it.
You think it's hard now walking away, think how difficult it would be after investing YEARS in a marriage (and possibly having kids.)
I've known too many people who said they had a feeling what they were doing was not right, but they went ahead with a marriage anyway, and they always regretted that decision. (I think Barbara S. and others made this same statement recently.)
You don't want any doubts. Good luck, sweetie! I know this is probably not what you wanted to hear, but I certainly don't want you miserable later. You deserve to be happy!
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I'm 25 and he's 24 .... what doesn't make sense to me is how all of a sudden he's so hot and cold. This is not like him at all....soooo out of character for him.
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I HATE to ask, but do you think he's intersted in someone else? Any strange behaviour?
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Thanks guys....I know you're all right about everything and I appreciate your advice more than you know.
I spoke to him on the phone about 2 hours ago and said that I wanted to talk about this with him further because I can't just leave it like this.
He acted like there was nothing wrong at all. He said, "I've already made plans tonight but how about tomorrow....oh and don't forget the family dinner at my place on thursday night". WHAT??!!!
And then I said that I feel like I've lost all faith, trust and security in our relationship and he said, "I can understand why you would feel that way but if I wanted to break up with you then I would have done it already".
I don't understand.....
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Honestly, I think you should dump him. Something is definitely up. More than likely he is scared of making such a LT commitment at a young age. Guys think like that at 24, 25. I was a much different person at 24 than I am now. I was not sure what I wanted back then. Now, I am older, a little wiser and I do know what I want and who I want it with.
good luck in whatever you decide to do. I know it is a rough time for you.
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well for the last 2-3 weeks he's seemed a little different and I've felt like there was something weird between us but I don't think he's seeing someone else. It's not in his character at all to cheat and I'm pretty sure if he wanted to be with someone else he would come out and tell me. It's not in his nature to stay in a situation he doesn't want to be in.
But I guess you never really know.....
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I was also thinking what Tina said.
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Seems like I'm always playing devil's advocate, but my husband and I got together when he was 20 and I was 19. We decided to get married then (though we waited 3 years to actually do it). I don't know if it's an age thing- maybe it's a right person thing? When you meet the right person it's not this difficult to decide to stay together? I'm not an expert on relationships (trust me) but it seems like it shouldn't be so hard.
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Maybe he thinks that he might 'want' to date other people and is scared to settle down.
Hard to speculate...
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