Does anyone else get jealous?
#193559 - 07/09/05 06:08 AM
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BL
Reged: 06/01/03
Posts: 3522
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I ate lunch at a deli yesterday, and I sat and watched all the people around me piling up things at the salad bar. I couldn't help but STARE at the woman sitting next to me who had a plate piled with:
raw spinach, mushrooms, broccoli, red onions, potato salad, pasta salad, cole slaw, bacon, cheese---all topped with a creamy Ranch dressing.
It looks so heavy and full of IBS triggers that my stomach was hurting just looking at it!
I felt so out of place. There must have been 20 customers around me, all eating like this---and I thought to myself, "Why can't I eat like this?"
I used to---and just took it for granted.
I wanted to shake this people and scream, "Do you know how lucky you are? You can eat whatever you want, it goes through your colon and out the other end---with no commotion or any thought on your part."
Gosh, if my teenage son had known what I was thinking, he would've been embarrassed!
(By the way, I ordered a turkey sandwich on French bread, and had Baked Lays chips---and I was so nervous that I might not survive the shopping trip with my son. Urgent D did hit me later, but thank goodness, it was after I had dropped my son off at a friend's house ---and I made it to a Burger King where I found a restroom in time.)
I get so mad that everyone else can eat what I would like to---and they don't have a problem.
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Just keep telling yourself- it'll go straight to their hips, butt, stomach!!! At least with us it comes out!!! I love that ad- whose-ever it is with the honey buns on her buns- great!!
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I know I do at times too! I'm a college student, which means people eating pizza and yummy smelling lunch truck food all around me. I have meetings for clubs I'm in where they buy pizza for everyone, and I have to make sure I bring my own food, and it sucks and really gets to me at times! I just have to remember the consequences that would happen if I ate that stuff, and think about how much healthier my diet is than theirs!
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Melissa
Friendship is thicker than blood. ~Rent
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you probably eat a lot healthier than people around you. Honestly, even if I was 100% better, that lunch you described would make me sick just to think of it!! You probably eat less fattening, rich foods than "normal" people, which is better for you regardless. Eating with Heather's diet guidelines in mind has made me a LOT more aware of what I put into my mouth, what the consequences are (IBS and otherwise), and it's really altered my perception of food and it's purpose. Not that I don't still love eating!! I just love it in a healthier way now! (I've learned to live without ranch dressing and don't even miss it!)
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Yep, I do. Last night when I was at the gym my stomach got completely swollen. It was painful, but I ended up making myself work out for the hour anyway. It would be cool if that didn't randomly happen to me. Ah well, perhaps they have a huge life problem we can't see that we wouldn't want! Plus, ranch dressing is gross. 
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I used to... but now the thought of aioli (which I used to love) or custard, or cream makes me feel kinda ill. Knowing what that stuff does to me puts me off wanting to eat it - it's actually less tasty because of it.
I am definitely jealous of people who can just, like, eat gummi worms for dinner with ice cream for dessert (I know a girl who does stuff like that often, she's a bit useless in the looking-after-herself department).
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*Emma*
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Hi BL,
I don't guess I really get jealous but it would just be nice not to always be on "ALERT" when picking out food and have to read labels all the time.
Thankfully, I have been able to eat a little pizza & a small amount of ice cream once in a while but what bugs me is that I can't eat the healthy foods. Things like veggies & fruits. I would just love to eat a whole banana or take a bite out of a juicy apple but I wouldn't dare. I've had oatmeal every morning for years and people are amazed that I'm not tired of it. Well, it's good for me and agrees with my tummy so I'll stick with it.
We eat out a lot but usually at restaurants that I know have something that I can eat. Chinese: steamed rice and terayaki chicken, Italian: pasta with plain sauce, Mexican: chicken fajita strips wrapped in flour tortilla.(hubby fills his with salsa, guacomale, sour cream & cheese,plus eats a whole bowl of chips & hot sauce,ugh) I always freak out when our friends want to go to a restaurant that I've never been to before. I always go online to see what they serve and see if there is something I can eat. It's just such a pain.
My hubby has a stomach of steel. He can eat anything and sometimes that bothers me because I wish I could be like that. Fruits, veggies, spinach, beans, spicy stuff, etc. If I ate any kind of beans I would be on the potty for days.
In spite of this, I am willing to be on " FOOD ALERT" if it makes my tummy feel good.
Any day that my tummy feels good is a great day and I'll do what it takes.
Barbie
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yes, at times...
#193574 - 07/09/05 08:09 AM
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Alyson McG
Reged: 05/20/05
Posts: 317
Loc: Vancouver Washington (IBS-A, but D prominant)
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I am still adjusting and sometimes have a hard time missing some of my favorites. Plus I have so many triggers, I find it hard to find anything to eat most of the time that wont hurt, so when I do see someone just grab something and eat it, I do get a little pang on envy..:(
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Everything in life happens for a reason, patience will eventually tell us what that is......
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Barbie...
#193577 - 07/09/05 08:15 AM
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Alyson McG
Reged: 05/20/05
Posts: 317
Loc: Vancouver Washington (IBS-A, but D prominant)
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You have problems with fruits and veggies too? I thought it was just me. Bananas have always been my favorite, but now they just tear my stomach apart, so much for them being a safe food. And it seems like many fruits and veggies don't agree with me too. I feel so guilty all of the time for not eating more of them, but know I really can't handle them. I do have a peach everyday in my morning oatmeal, whichh BTW is really the only thing I have found that I can eat on a regular basis that doesn't cause an attack...how could we get tired of something that doesn't hurt us?
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Everything in life happens for a reason, patience will eventually tell us what that is......
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I am not as noble as the others who have written!  I get extemely jealous of others as they eat their pizza, burgers, fries, turtle sundeas, homemade lasagna with gooey cheese, chili cheese fries, and the healthier foods too....like a yummy salad with all the fixins and that heavenly ranch dressing! I used to love huge salads with tons of tomotoes, raw brocolli, cauliflower, cucumbers, all tossed with a low fat creamy Ranch dressing! I used to top my baked potato (with the yummy skin) with cheese and brocolli and Ranch dressing,
Sorry, I'm not making you feel better, but yes, I get horribly jealous when I see others freely eating all these foods while laughing and celebrating and enjoying the taste of the food. Like you said, they don't have a clue how lucky they are just to be able to partake in this delicious treat life offers. Food is meant to be savored, enjoyed, shared with friends. Not measured, watched, feared, inspected, analyzed, restricted.
We had a party at work for all the student workers and guess what they ordered? Pizza, while I sat there with my Gluten Free Turkey Sandwhich, plain! And my coworkers are big on going out for lunch on Fridays...and I watch them eat the salads, Thai, and heavenly foods while I once again eat my stupid plain Gluten Free Turkey sandwhich. Who wouldn't be jealous!
These people have no clue how lucky they are not to have to think twice about the food, except for maybe gaining a pound if they overdue it. But I miss the healthy foods too that I can no longer eat...like the raw veggie salads, the low fat yogurt, etc. It's not just the more "unhealthy" foods I miss. In fact, the majority of the foods I do miss are the healthy ones!
And being GF makes it even more restrictive. I was very healthy before going on an IBS diet, so it's not that I am any healthier eating this way...if anything, I am eating less healthy since I cannot eat many veggies, fruits, and the Natural Ovens heavenly blueberry low fat muffins, dinner rolls and bagels! (they all have too much whole wheat and fiber). I am finding I eat more sugary cereals, and limited veggies, fruits, etc...and that cannot be good. Gone are the days of just taking an lovely, huge Golden Delicious Apple out of the fridge and biting into it whole! Or enjoying a piece of fresh corn on the cob and watermelon at a summer picnic.
I could go on forever. I guess I'm just having a "sorry for myself" day, and your post was like I could have written it myself, BL!
I admit, I'm green with envy! I think if I were feeling any relief from my restrictive diet, I might have a better attitude about missing out on all the food. In fact, I know I would. But to cut out so many foods (and I need to cut out more than most as I am unable to tolerate a great amount that is even considered safe for most IBS ers, like soy substitues) and still feel so much pain, gas, bloat, and constipation...that just is NOT FAIR.
Okay, pity party is over for today. Sorry to be such a bummer...I'm in one of my moods! Short answer to your question is yes, I do get jealous!
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~ Beth
Constipation, pain prodominent,cramps, spasms and bloat!
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Hi Alyson,
Yes, there are several on the boards that have problems with veggies & fruits. Some have tried fruits in smoothies, but I haven't done that, yet. I'm a little scared to try anything that could bother my tummy.
I have tried about a tablespoon of banana in my oatmeal and that seems to be OK. Good idea with the peaches in your oatmeal. I have some diced peaches in my pantry and have thought I might try them in my oatmeal but just haven't gotten the courage, yet.
I am taking vitamins so hopefully they take up some of the slack of no veggies & fruits.
As you can tell I'm a little scared to try anything new. AND, I agree, how could you get tired of something that doesn't hurt you.
Barbie
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Me too
#193584 - 07/09/05 08:38 AM
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Augie
Reged: 10/27/04
Posts: 5807
Loc: Illinois
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Bananas, potatoes, mushrooms are all considered safe...but I think they cause me more problems. I'm not sure yet, as I have a hard time pinpointing my triggers since I am not stable and all food is suspect!
Do you peel and/or cook your peach first? Or do you do canned?
It's summer fruit season now, and I miss all the lovely fruits!
what fruits and veggies can you eat?
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~ Beth
Constipation, pain prodominent,cramps, spasms and bloat!
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Re: Me too
#193587 - 07/09/05 08:52 AM
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Alyson McG
Reged: 05/20/05
Posts: 317
Loc: Vancouver Washington (IBS-A, but D prominant)
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Hi Beth, I just peel and cut it up and throw it in while the oatmeal is cooking. It's actually the recipe in Heather's "the First year" book. I just love it! As for other fruits and veggies, I seem to be able to sometimes tolerate mango, peaches and berries in a smoothie, though not always. I have yet to find any veggies that don't hurt me. I too am still trying to figure out the triggers. It seems that what bothers me today, may not tomorrow, but then the next day it will  I just don't get it. Fun, isn't it???
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Everything in life happens for a reason, patience will eventually tell us what that is......
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One day it bothers me, the next maybe not. No pattern or consistency. That's why I'm not really sure if bananas, mushrooms, and potatoes are really a problem or not. I think they are... But can't say for sure.
Oh, yeah, it's fun alright. 
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~ Beth
Constipation, pain prodominent,cramps, spasms and bloat!
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yes!
#193591 - 07/09/05 09:22 AM
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jen1013
Reged: 05/06/05
Posts: 1322
Loc: the wabe
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I sometimes get resentful of my husband, who has no qualms about eating whatever he wants in front of me. So I stock the kitchen with stuff that I know that he likes but that I've never cared for anyway. A sneaky way of being self-serving while pretending to be nice.
I've been on Heather's diet for a year and there isn't a whole lot I still really, really miss. I've always been very miserly so even when I could eat whatever I wanted I still stuck mainly to really cheap and easy staples like peanut butter crackers, sandwiches, and raw carrots. At any given time I'd kill for a Cherry Coke, though.
P.S. Speaking of raw carrots, is there ANYONE who can digest these? Even if I eat like three of them after a huge plate of soluble fiber and chew really really well, they still come out the other end completely unscathed by the digestive process.
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jen
"It's one of the most serious things that can possibly happen to one in a battle -- to get one's head cut off." -- LC
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It's hard to see others sipping that lovely morning coffee or popping open a refreshing can of sodie while we drink our herbal tea and water!(I know these are healthier,but....
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~ Beth
Constipation, pain prodominent,cramps, spasms and bloat!
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Me too!
#193658 - 07/09/05 01:40 PM
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Janey
Reged: 10/25/03
Posts: 1716
Loc: Maryland
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I find myself feeling very envious when I see people walking down the street eating ice cream or chips or drinking a soda. I do cheat at times with some of these things but I have to make sure I am going to be home near a bathroom just in case.
What I am more jealous of is that people without IBS can go on a road trip, bus tour, to the beach, out to eat or to a friends house and even something as simple as taking a walk right after eating without a thought about a bathroom and where the closest one is. I wouldn't care what kind of food I ate if I could do things without thinking about a bathroom where ever I go. I stress out so much about this I find I don't want to ride in the car with anyone other than my family for fear that I will have an attack. I hate this part of having IBS. Even when I am stable which I am most of the time now I worry.
There are so many things that I do not do because of IBS. Just can't take the stress of worrying about the possibility of needing a bathroom.
The last time I was home visiting my sister wanted to go to NC (about a 40 min. drive) to eat dinner at an oyster bar. I told her flat out that there was no way I would drive that far to eat a meal.
Hubby always teases me that I know every bathroom in town. It is true, every path I take in the car I scope out the bathrooms in case I ever have to stop.
It is crazy and I feel like I am obsessive sometimes about it. It can't be helped though as I have been caught too many times having to do "D" and there is no bathroom around.
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Janey
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I feel so much better now that I have no desire to eat trigger foods. I do eat trigger foods once and awhile, but pay for it later.
I was never a junk food person, so for me there isn't much to miss.
But I do admit to missing cake loaded with buttercream frosting!!!! YUM
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Heck, yeah, I get jealous!  To be honest, I really don't miss drinking pop or eating red meat all that much, but I do miss coffees, most dairy products (especially cheese & milk shakes), salads, just about anything with tomato sauce and PIZZA!
And I'm sooooo glad that I can usually tolerate chocolate. Life without chocolate...man, I don't want to think about that!
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Janey
#193688 - 07/09/05 04:57 PM
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BL
Reged: 06/01/03
Posts: 3522
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I am having a hard time with 2 things you mentioned: doing activities right after eating and riding in the car with others afterwards.
My husband and sons don't understand. When we are traveling, I beg them to just wait 5-10 minutes (at least!) until we get back in the car and on the road. They just roll their eyes and each time, they ask me why. Why do I have to explain in detail my bowel movements every time? I don't know when they will ever understand that I will not get in the car unless I know my tummy's stable.
Also, I would love to go to walk, to the outdoor symphony, to a fireworks show, but I would never.....because I might have to GO and there might not be a bathroom available.
Also, a lot of time friends get together at a restaurant and they all want to carpool. I do go out to eat with my husband, but only at restaurants near our house and ones where I know where the bathrooms are! I can't go out to eat with a group----on the other side of town. If I did, I would be so NERVOUS wondering WHAT IF something happened to my tummy. I feel trapped, and I think the stress makes it worse.
It is nice to know that others understand this. I wish my family and friends could trade places with me for just one day so they would understand.
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I don't really get jealous, but I have to agree with Barbie, that it would be nice not to have to think about it all the time, and to check labels and such ... it's soooo time consuming (though I guess not as time consuming as being in the bathroom)! I want to just open the fridge or run to the store and pick something out when I'm hungry!
I did get kind of upset the other day though when our a/c was out at work. My boss asked if I could eat ice cream and I said no, so he goes and gets ice cream bars for himself and the other girls at work, and nothing for me! He could have asked me if I wanted something cool to drink .. Such is life, I guess!
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~*Amber*~
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I get jealous in my own house! DH is TOTALLY unsuportive of my GF safe diet and will happily penny pinch out of my wallet to feed his face with KFC, Mc Donald's, pizza, pancakes you name it he's eating it! Sitting at the food court while he eats and looking at all these salad's, chips, chicken, ooh chicken kebabs with creamy garlic sauce, YUM! And NO ONE knows what they're eating and certainly don't enjoy it half as much as I would. I miss the healthy stuff too. I can't remember the last whole piece of fruit I ate (the thought alone of eating a mango has me cramping and ready for a toilet visit). I MISS fruit the most I think and as Beth said my whole life seems to now be sugary, wheat free junk food. What I'd give for a massive plate of nothing but fresh fruit and steamed veges with zero consequences (sorry I'm getting on my soap box and playing my own violin now, will quiely hop off and back down  ). Yes I get insanely jealous.
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Amy
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Re: BL
#193730 - 07/09/05 09:04 PM
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Janey
Reged: 10/25/03
Posts: 1716
Loc: Maryland
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I have often thought the same thing, if only my family could live my life with IBS for one day. They would certainly understand more that is for sure.
Just the thought of riding in the car with someone else is enough to make my stomach start cramping up.
You are definiately not alone.
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Janey
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I just remind myself of how many of those people are going to end up with health problems later in life from eating all that crap. No thank you! I'm almost GLAD I developed IBS and gallstones, because they were the wake-up calls I needed to make positive changes to my health before I did even MORE damage to myself than I already have.
The only thing I ever really miss is ice cream... and usually taking a spoonful of someone else's is enough, because it doesn't even taste GOOD to me anymore: it tastes like frozen lard.
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I certainly have my moments. LIke last weekend when we were at the lake and there is this spread of dips and cakes and cookies that everyone brought and none of it I can eat!  There was one little thing I brought to hold me over. I just get so tired sometimes of watching everything I eat. It can be depressing. But I do try to take comfort in the fact that I have slimmed down quite a bit and get a lot of compliments from that. But oh to go to a restaurant and not have to worry if there is something I can eat!!!
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Lard
#193858 - 07/10/05 12:37 PM
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jen1013
Reged: 05/06/05
Posts: 1322
Loc: the wabe
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A couple months ago we dug our wedding cake out of the freezer for our one-year wedding annivesary. I LOVED that cake at the wedding -- I ate two pieces of it -- and now that cake tasted to me like the grossest thing ever. It was like a sugary sponge topped with an inch of lard.
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jen
"It's one of the most serious things that can possibly happen to one in a battle -- to get one's head cut off." -- LC
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... I get even and cheat  Well, lately anyways, so I need to stop that ASAP. Part of it is that I am too lazy to cook lately, and too tired of the same easy to make or just buy staples.
I tried to be kinda safe today, and got bean tacos from Taco Bell, but they screwed up my gordita and put sourcream on it. i still ate it
In all seriousness, Itend not to get jealous of the types of foods that others can eat, since I am very happy with the stuff that we are allowed to... I get more jealous that they can pull up to a drivethru anywhere and instantly have a meal, where I have to hunt something down and seriously modify it (and hope whoever assembled it made it right).
There is not many quick foods we can just grab like that it seems. I know alot of my problem though is self imposed by being vegetarian, so I can't really complain.
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-Sheri
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I was at an Italian restraunt and was watching this girl eat a salad and some other stuff. I kept thinking to myself, geez I hope this slice of Pizza and 1 pierogie stay in me for the rest of the day and this girl was eating whatever. I wondered if she thought the same thing about her meal I HIGHLY doubt it though!
It's frustrating. I also hate how I have to base the rest of my evening on what I eat. If I eat out am I gonna be able to quick run to the store afterwards to pick up a few things or will I have to go home? Dinner and movie????What the heck is that????? IT's usually dinner then a rented movie from Blockbuster in the privacy of my own home 
I miss ice cream the most!!! Mint chocolate chip. That was my favorite. I've been able to substitute that craving though with mint cookies or mint choc chip water ice from Rita's. It's never gonna be the same but it'll do!!!
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~~~Lisa~~~
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.... there are people better off than me, and there are people worse off than me. I know, I know... some days I don't see it that way at all and have a pity party. But at the end of the day all we can do is control how we respond to the situation we're given, our own attitude. When I can, I try to be grateful rather than jealous... but I have a lot of days like yours here, too.
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Take care,
Michelle
...the greatest of these is LOVE. (I Cor 13)
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Re: Yup.
#193907 - 07/10/05 06:11 PM
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Wind
Reged: 04/02/05
Posts: 3178
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I just look at an apple and get jealous of all the people that can eat it as is, peel and all. Everytime I see one of those big,green apples, I get very very jealous.
Whenever I walk past the crudite at my local grocery salad bar, I get very jealous. I see a box of mache (lamb's lettuce) and I'm very jealous.
Otherwise, I've adapted. I just miss noshing an apple, WITH THE SKIN and eating peaches and cherries off the trees and grapes all afternoon.
I miss eating raw celery, too. And eating a pound of raw greens for dinner.
Oh well, there's no point in being jealous...I've adapted.
C'est la vie.
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I wish I could think like that ALL the time. I do a lot of the time, but sometimes I still get jealous and sad about things everyone else can eat.
I'm going to keep reminding myself of what you said!
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~Cara~
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I sure do. I wish I could eat more of the things I crave. I wish I could drink coffee and drink more than one alcoholic beverage.
OH YES!
** I should add that I cheat sometimes and pay for it. Like today. I had cream cheese on my bagel. DUH!!!! Someone slap me!
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I don't really get jealous per say! I do have small bouts of wishfulness (if that's even a word LOL) But it passes quickly when I can smell it and my tummy starts to rumble.
I don't know, maybe I just consider myself lucky enough to have found these boards with the recipe exchange, because I really don't feel like I'm missing out on anything when I browse these boards.
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Lana_Marie
Proud Mommy to Bentley Taylor
Born May 12, 2004 9lbs, 3oz
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