Slightly Annoyed..
#187073 - 06/17/05 08:25 PM
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Hey Ya'll...
Today I was hanging out with two boys in my program (one of which I dated) and the one I used to date said that he gets so annoyed with me because i'm too on the surface and can't talk deep about anything.
I think that this is ENTIRELY untrue. Its true that I'm not as deep as him (he sits in between classes and analyzing how a run in with a squirrel on the path influenced his life) but I don't think i'm a total idiot either.
I'm kinda bothered by this, becasue i dont' want to be seen as a total idiot. I'm well educated and not only have a masters but am now going for a specialist degree at Tufts so I'm not a total idiot..but he's made me feel self conscious about talking in class now because i'm too "on the surface."
I will be honest.. I like to see humor in life, and I don't take things incredibly seriously.. so maybe these are bad characteristics to have as a student or a professional?!?! I don't think I should be judged.. just because I like to shop for cute clothes shouldn't make working hard for my degree mean any less than the people that sit around pondering it all day.
ROAR.
I'm just wondering how many of you are really passionate about things and really hardcore about everything.. because I'm not and I'm wondering if maybe this is a downfall or not allowing me to be a good well rounded person. I mean maybe he has a point?
There are things I love, but I'm not incredibly passionate and preachy about alot of things.. and I'm wondering if this is bad and maybe that I should find something to be more passionate about in life?!!?
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Honestly Ashley, this guy is probably pondering life so much that it is just passing him by. It is good to live life to the fullest, laugh and be merry. They will plenty of instances in life where you won't be happy. Make the most of the times where you can enjoy life. I am sure there are things that you are passionate about. Unfortunately people can be jealous of those who are happy because they want that happness as well. So what these people will do is try to bring you down. Don't let him get under your skin. That was his goal. Go out and have some fun tonight.
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Do you have more guy friends than girl friends?
I've found that since I don't take a lot of things too seriously, I get along better with guys. I too prefer humor over seriousness, and can't seem to get into deep issues like politics and stuff like that.
Don't even stress over what an EX says about your personality. Obviously he has a much different personality than you do, which may be a reason why he's your ex now.
In my opinion, life is too serious sometimes.
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- Jennifer
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I can be a pretty deep person. In fact, it's been said that if the world sees things in black and white, Teresa sees them in bright psychodelic colors. I am a social work major, this isn't necessarily a downfall for me.
I must admit, however, that I am not always deep. I guess when I think about school, it's like there is another dimension for me.. but I think I will owe my clients that much. When it comes to MY life, I am not deep at all. I love to have fun. I LOOOOVE to laugh. I just like to examine a lot of possibilities in life....
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hey ashley
you sound like a perfectly balanced person...don't try and change yourself. its such a gift to see the humour in life, its wonderful coping mechanism and being a heavy person myself, I often wish I could be more like that. often people like this guy get arrogant about being 'deep'...when infact they are the one dimensional ones because they are unable to be 'light' when needed. you know you are a really smart person. I've had people tell me the same thing as he has told you because I like to flirt and giggle and be silly. on another note, is he bitter about your breakup?
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Feel the fear and do it anyway!
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Its true what you said about pondering your life away.. and that is not something I'm interested in.
I like to laugh and have fun, and if necessary I can be serious... but I think life is more fun when it doesn't happen all the time
thanks for the support tommy!
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haha good point about why we aren't together now! haha..
he was too intense.. I'm just worried i'm not intense enough and come off as flighty... but whatever, I like who I am!  (but it still sucks to hear that people talk about you in negative ways.)
As for the boys and girls as friends.. I get along well with boys and tend to have more friends that are boys than girls..but I do have some girl friends.. I can't go more than a month without a little girl R&R! (ie pedicures, sex and the city and martinis with the girls. )
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Thanks.. Maybe I should try to come across more serious at school.
In my internship and in the field I do take it seriously and act seriously.. but In class I tend to joke because I feel more comfortable.. but apparently this can offend some people.
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Hi Dalia!
Thanks for the great reply! I don't think he's too bitter about the breakup.. he has a new girlfriend. Everyone that knows him says he still holds a candle for me..b ut I dont' think that it is anything serious, or enough to make him be mean just cause he's bitter.
Thanks for the reassurance about being balanced though, because what he said did make me feel kinda stupid.
I'm with you though dalia, being silly and giggling are some of my favorite things to do.
Anyways.. when we dated he was much different about six months ago but since he's transformed himself into a much different person.. hes become "deeper" and is definitly arrogant about it!! thats what makes this even more annoying.
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I tend to be pretty passionate about most things, a lot of times Eric and I argue for fun- but it doesn't mean that I would want all of my friends to be just like me. I have a lot of friends that are very laid back and easy going, I think you need all kinds of personalities around. And, I'm sure you know this, but if you throw a pencil in a grad school you'll hit a pretentious jerk.  I say just be who you are, it's the easiest way to live your life and you're the best at it!
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