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You hit the nail on the head. I see all my friends getting married to the guys they were dating when we met, they all ahve homes, take vacations and I want all that. I think that's why I've stayed with him. I don't think I can have that without him? No true. He's VERY bad with money and we'll never get a house at this rate...
You're right! What the heck am I waiting for?????
Thanks Paula!
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-------------------- Formerly known as Ruchie
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It sounds to me like I know exactly where you're coming from. Here's what I think: I think it'll happen- you'll leave him when you're ready, and you'll know precisely when that is. Seriously, it's like you'll hear a tumbler in a lock click and you'll say to yourself, "it's time." The good news is that you'll march onward and you'll make damn sure to claim the life you want after having come so close to @#$%^ing it away before. I got the good man and the house (didn't get the kids cause we decided we didn't want them ) In my case, and maybe in yours too, this bitter ending got to be about trying to take more care of him than I was taking care of me. I really had to come to terms with the fact that there was no more that I could do for him! I couldn't fix him. But you can, and you must, do what's gonna make your life what you want it to be. All my best wishes from a "big sister" who's been there. Hope this is helpful to you.
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Tina,
I am sorry to hear that you are having such a rough time of it. You have been feeling this way for quite some time. It sounds to me like you are getting ready to move on with your life. It is a hard decision to make when you have been with someone for 10 years but I agree with Ruchie, you have to put yourself and your happiness first. You can't worry about him. It doesn't sound like he looks after you and your feelings and in fact puts you down. Not the makings of a happy relationship.
Don't think of the past 10 years as a waste. Everything we experience in life makes us the people that we become. I have had a really difficult time through the years realizing this. You can't spend your time regreting. Use your energies for positive thoughts and actions. You will feel much better.
Life is too short to spend it feeling miserable. I am sending you good thoughts, prayers and hugs.
-------------------- Janey
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Tina honey, I think you know what to do, and that you need to do it, YOU JUST NEED TO DO IT NOW! You do NOT have to put up with any of that. And quite frankly, he is hurting you, he's emotionally abusing you, and that is not right nor do you have to take. Please do something, you deserve to be happy and to not have to put up with this.
Let us know if you need ANYTHING. My email is in my profile if you need someone to talk to.
-------------------- Melissa
Friendship is thicker than blood. ~Rent
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I know he is hurting me. I have to remind myself of that!
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Paula,
I really can't fix him. Not sure what the heck all his anger is even about???
I thought I would dump him tonight but have realized that I need to find a new apt. before I do that. So I will start looking and pray that I can afford to live on my own. I was going to move in with a friend but she's allergic to cats. Darn.
I'd love to have you as a big sister!
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