I feel like such a loser...
#147406 - 02/07/05 07:50 AM
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atomic rose
Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)
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Yesterday Adam was home sick with a migraine. He ended up sleeping all day. I was doubly worried - first about him, and then second because he calls in A LOT, and I have to worry about him losing his job because he's sick too often.
Then today he wakes up throwing up, and says he feels like he has the flu.  For those of you who don't know, I'm EXTREMELY emetophobic, so I'm holed up in my office, shaking like a leaf, completely freaking out because I think I'm going to get it... or that I'm already in the process of getting it, since I woke up this morning crampy and now I have D.
I'm only admitting this because I know there's other emetophobes on here who can sympathize... I otherwise feel like a real jerk for freaking out like this. I'm trying to reason with myself and calm myself down, but of course it really isn't working.
Sigh. 
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Casey-
First of all you are not a loser! So don't even think that for a second. You are one of the nicest kindest people I have ever met! As far as what you are going through I don't personally know from experience what it's like but as with anything I am sure it is hell. Try to calm down and breath!  You are already exposed so if you going to get sick you will no matter if you stress about it or not. I am big believer in the fact that you can make yourself catch something by obsessing about it. If I can make it in a classroom of 21 GERMY fifth graders then you can too! Take it easy today and rememeber YOU ARE NOT A LOSER!
*Hugs*
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When hubby gets sick I always want to sleep on the floor so I don't get what he has. I am always catching stuff. I had to quit teaching cause I caught what the kids had so much. And I wonder how much of this is psychological!? I always feel guilty when hubby gets sick for not wanting to kiss him or hug him... I don't think I have it as bad as you do...but I'm def. not normal about this stuff.
As far as worrying about Adam...is he ok? I would be worried too! Have you been able to talk to him about it?
Sorry, I'm fuzzy right now. This might not make much sense.
Anyway, Casey, you're a fantastic person! Please don't feel guilty for being YOU, ok? *hugs*
Love ya...
Keep us posted on how Adam...and you...are doing!
Love,
Ruchie
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Formerly known as Ruchie
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Casey
#147432 - 02/07/05 08:48 AM
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BL
Reged: 06/01/03
Posts: 3522
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Please don't call yourself a loser! You are not a loser just because you have this phobia. I can relate, because I used to have a phobia about catching a cold. This happened after I had my nasal surgery and was having a hard time breathing. I would literally have a panic attack if I came in contact with someone who had a cold.
One of my neighbors brought me a pie she had just baked right after my surgery. Well, she made the mistake of telling me she had a cold---and I refused to take a bite of the pie! And a friend came by with her grandson who had a cold. The baby dropped his pacifer right by my foot. She asked me to pick it up---and I thought I was going to die. I refused to touch the thing! So I can understand your fear!!!
For some reason, this doesn't bother me anymore, but it did for several years.
You have got to get your mind off of this so that you don't make yourself sick thinking about it! Can you leave the house and get away from Adam for awhile? Get you some Lysol spray and wipes and wipe down the house!
You'll be just fine. Chances are, you won't get what he has. My son recently had a horrible stomach virus---and no one else in the family got it. So think positive!!!!
I'll say a prayer for you! ((((Hugs))))
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Don't feel like a loser!! I have exactly the same phobia. Whenever someone says they feel like throwing up or that they have thrown up recently I want to stay as far away as possible.
I also start to panic and start thinking I'm catching it. I start to feel symptoms that aren't even there!!
Unfortunately I have no solutions for this problem...but I can relate to what you're going through. *HUGS*
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Whenever I'm at a speaker and the person next to me starts coughing or sneezing I just want to get up and sit somewhere else. I never d cause I'm too afriad to hurt that person. But I always worry I will get what they have.
I'm glad you brought htis up Casey. I never knew there were other people like this too...
But I must say neither one of us is a loser. We just don't like being sick. Having IBS (and fibro for me), who can blame us?
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Formerly known as Ruchie
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That's what I take to ward off the leurgys...they make my Fibro so much worse.
I liked the anti-bac wipes and spray idea! Those things are great.
Good luck. And get better soon Adam! 
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--------------------
Formerly known as Ruchie
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...the unseen ENEMY! Leurgys is one of my Mum's sayings from my childhood! 
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Oh, sweetie, I wish I could come be with you in your little office and hug you until you stop shaking! I'm so sorry you are so upset.
The D you are starting to have may be psychological. I believe we can make ourselves sick just by our minds reaction to our fear. Just consider the placebo effect of drugs and the powerful effect they have on our minds.
You may not get sick, but if you do, you will be okay and will deal with it and get over it. That's the worst that can happen, so please try and settle down and know that even if the worst does happen, you will get through it!
Please don't think you are a loser, sweetie! You are one of the most considerate, giving, heartfelt person I have ever met. We all have our phobias. I know that everytime I read anything on the boards about GI problems, I think I have that! Including Pelvic floor dyssingeria sp?, fibro, insulin sensitivity, etc. Remember how freaked out I was when I read about hiccups and I got so upset because I thought it was a sign of stomach cancer like the articles suggested? I am obsessed with figuring out my "problem" and treatments. Would you call me a loser? NO! Even though I feel like it. We need each other to get a reality check! You are human and this phobia is part of you, and we all love you, the whole package!
If this is an ongoing fear of yours, have you ever thought about going to the drugstore and buying those masks that you can put over your nose and mouth? The nurses wear them in the isolation rooms. You might feel silly, but it may help you to feel more protected and who the heck is going to see you besides Adam. Or, make Adam wear one! You could have these on hand for the future so you can get one on before you are even exposed.
How is poor Adam feeling? I hope his bosses are okay with his being sick. This is another fear of his jeapordizing his job that may be contributing to your emotional state and also to your tummy not feeling well. Poor thing. BTW, I don't think he would be jeapordizing his job. He can't help that he is sick. This time of year is the time for these bugs to be going around. So try not to jump to this conclusion. Try not to go to that place in your mind! I know, easier said than done.
Try to breath and no that no matter what, this will pass, it won't kill you, and that you have come through worse things before. You will get through this and things will return to normal again.
Keep us updated on both you and Adam.
Love and HUGS to you sweetie.
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~ Beth
Constipation, pain prodominent,cramps, spasms and bloat!
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