i'm bored
#147329 - 02/06/05 08:54 PM
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Betharoo
Reged: 01/28/05
Posts: 815
Loc: Ontario, Canada
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Am I the only one who doesn't watch sports???
lol sorry I am bored tonight. I did make chocolate applesauce cake and banana bread though hope they'll be yummy
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Microscopic Colitis, IBS-A, GERD, Hiatal Hernia
Bethany, Ontario, Canada
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Me too
#147511 - 02/07/05 11:28 AM
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Nelly
Reged: 08/06/04
Posts: 4381
Loc: Within stray mortar fire of DC
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They previewed all the good commercials before the game, so I didn't watch at all this year. Usually I Tivo it and ff through the game and only watch the ads plus the last 2 minutes of the game. But I didn't even do that this year.
So instead I watched DBF play video games, occasionally coaxing him into a makeout session.  He was complaining that his lips were chapped by the end of the night, but I told him to suck it up. 
Tee heee!! Better than TV!
~nelly~
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Nelly, it sounds like the two of you can never get enough of each other!  
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Re: Me too
#147581 - 02/07/05 03:56 PM
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Nelly
Reged: 08/06/04
Posts: 4381
Loc: Within stray mortar fire of DC
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We're still hopelessly in love. It's sick. We hold hands in public. Our friends always complain.
~nelly~
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Thats not sick! Thats great to have that feeling. It should never end even if you're together for 50 years! Sorry, I am a hopeless romantic. Know what I am sayin?
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Re: Me too
#147622 - 02/07/05 06:49 PM
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Nelly
Reged: 08/06/04
Posts: 4381
Loc: Within stray mortar fire of DC
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I hear ya, Tommy!! That's the way it SHOULD be!!!!
~nelly~
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Re: Me too
#147641 - 02/07/05 08:34 PM
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Sheri01
Reged: 04/19/04
Posts: 1731
Loc: New Jersey
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I wish I still had that. *sigh* Chris and I were the perfect couple, then ever last bit of romanticism has been sucked out of him (not like he had much to begin with  ) We are still in the 'best friends' phase, and I am still hopelessy waiting for things to pick up again, but I am ready to give up on him. 
I want what you two have! I am just afraid I'll never find it, so I oughta just stay with someone that is good for me. but heck, I am young enough that I have time! I need some passion. We can go a whole weekend now with no sex and barely any smooching... that is just not right! 
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-Sheri
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I am sure my boyfriend (who also doesn't watch sports) would have preffered your alternative to the game than my sitting her and typing that I am bored and reading posts lol.
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Microscopic Colitis, IBS-A, GERD, Hiatal Hernia
Bethany, Ontario, Canada
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Re: Me too
#147792 - 02/08/05 12:11 PM
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Nelly
Reged: 08/06/04
Posts: 4381
Loc: Within stray mortar fire of DC
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You've got a long life ahead of you with many boyfriends in your future! Make the best of what you have, and if it's not enough, look him in the eye and ask him if he has any cute friends who are more into messin' around.
My BF is my 8th serious boyfriend, and I've traded up on every model! So he's at the end of a long line of great guys, each one better than the last. The important thing is that he realizes it's his job to satisfy me, and it's my job to satisfy him. We treat it like a contest, who can give the most pleasure to whom! A healthy contest it is!
But being able to make out and steam up the windows of the car is important to me! I wouldn't stick around if I didn't feel that with someone. Everyone's gotta have priorities!!
~nelly~ You can't make someone happy, but you can make them forget they're unhappy for a while!
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~nelly~
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My boyfriend and I have been together 3 1/2 years (we were together 3 years, broke up for a year and then got back together 6 months ago)....ANYWAY...we still have lots of chemistry and sparks so I can't complain (he is super cute though and really sweet so that helps). We still hold hands constantly (even when we're just watching tv!! Gag I know!!) ...it's great!!
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How long have you guys been together?
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Wow, Nelly, that's great.
My friend's BF once had a chart above her bed and she got to check off each time she.... you know what!
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Re: Me too
#147835 - 02/08/05 01:19 PM
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Nelly
Reged: 08/06/04
Posts: 4381
Loc: Within stray mortar fire of DC
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*choke!* 9 years. We're 5 years apart in age and that keeps things spicy too. He's the younger one. Tee heee!
~nelly~
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Re: Me too
#147836 - 02/08/05 01:21 PM
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Nelly
Reged: 08/06/04
Posts: 4381
Loc: Within stray mortar fire of DC
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LOL! A chart! Now that's hot! I've heard of notches on the bedpost too, but that just destroys the furniture. There are better ways to break a bed.
~nelly~ Did I say that?
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Yes, a chart! I think it was a birthday gift from him and had 10 boxes to check off before the weekend was up!
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WOW!
#147841 - 02/08/05 01:25 PM
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9 years and you're still that passionate about each other? Wow! What's your secret Nelly?
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Re: WOW!
#147875 - 02/08/05 03:03 PM
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Nelly
Reged: 08/06/04
Posts: 4381
Loc: Within stray mortar fire of DC
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Trust is key. Never raise your voice at your sig other. Never call each other names. Never insult each other. Never tell each other they smell funny. Always compliment them in front of their friends. Bring them food when they ask-- don't let them ask twice and never sigh and complain.
Don't touch when they don't want to be touched. Be polite. Never be rude. Respect each other's space. Respect each other's property. Respect each other's SLEEP. Include each other in special activities. Don't make couples plans for each other.
Give "come hither" looks. Mean them. Be a generous lover. Take showers together. Give and receive massages and don't make a ceremony out of them. Include as many sexual activities during the day as allowed by natural and physical law. Make eye contact. Be equal and reciprocating always.
I guess that's about it! Do all of that (especially no name calling or yelling) and your sex life will always be great. As long as the 2 of you are on the same page, there's no worries!
~nelly~ Hey! Who the heck is nelly? What does she know??
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Thanks Nelly. I will keep your post as a reference! I'm totally serious too! I agree with everything you wrote.
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Hi Nelly - what a great post!
Several of my freinds say that Will and I exemplify the best marriage they have ever seen and they see us as the perfect couple and all, but I worry when I get sick and don't want to have sex for sometimes a week or more - really, I just don't feel up to it and I feel bad because he'll try to...well...start things up...and I just wriggle away because my tummy hurts or I'm exhausted and I feel sad about it and like I'm not being a good wife to him.
We do better with the never fighting thing...we almost never argue, and the few times we have we appolagize and work things out. He's good at helping me work out my feelings when they get bottled up inside my head - if he didn't help me it would be LOTS worse. I know you've gone through times of being really sick before too, do you think it's normal for a couple's sex life to suffer a bit when you're sick? He says he understands and he never gets upset with me about it or anything (we've actually gotten pretty good at talking about it) but I still feel bad when that happens. Just guilty stuff I guess.
Still, good post on important things to remember! Go home tonight and make hubby happy! 
He thanks you!
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Thanks, it's from the heart! Of course after I wrote it, BF was kissing my neck so we went and made out for a while. Tee hee heee! *japanese schoolgirl giggle with hand over mouth*
~nelly~
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Hey Min!
#147907 - 02/08/05 04:20 PM
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Nelly
Reged: 08/06/04
Posts: 4381
Loc: Within stray mortar fire of DC
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I really agree with you about the tummy problems interfering with sex. BF doesn't push me since he's witnessed an attack and knows it's no walk in the park. Sometimes he doesn't feel like sex either, so we just look at each other and say, "I really don't feel like sex right now" and then we respect each other's boundries when we make out.
But you're right, after about a week it's hard to negotiate your feelings around your tummy when you still don't feel 100%. When this happens to me I always try and remember, "don't start anything you can't finish." There's no reason to torture your mate when you can't close the deal, and communication is so key.
It helps that (brace yourself) I don't share a bed with DBF. We have seperate rooms and keep seperate sleep schedules.
Before you decide this is weird, let me point out that we don't have arguments in the morning when one person wakes the other one up, or one's snoring bothers the other person, or when one steals the sheets in the night, or kicks the other person awake, sleeps with the TV on waking the other, etc. Since we've kept this arangement for the last 5 years or so we've gotten along so much better, avoiding the common problems of the trappings of close cohabitation.
It's so much easier meeting up in the kitchen, kissing each other and giving a hug and asking how the other one slept.
It's amazing how many confrontational situations can be avoided with geography!! Just my 2 cents!
~nelly~
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My gosh, you guys never stop!
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I was shocked to read what you wrote about not sharing a bedroom!
We also have seperate bedrooms! I NEVER thought that anyone else actually did this besides us! WOW!!! We are a very non-traditional couple though. We've been living together for 5 years and we knew before we even moved in together that we couldn't share a bed and bedroom. No way! I have insomnia and he works a lot of nights and shift work. Besides he thinks that it's ok for him to take up 99% of the bed and leave me with a tiny little bit. I don't think so! Plus he likes the bedroom super cold and I like it room temperature. But the main reason is that he hates to cuddle! I like to but he doesn't. It's more his doing than mine.
Here let me prove it with pictures!
Here's my bedroom:
http://tinypic.com/1oofty
And here's his:
http://tinypic.com/1oofsx
Our friends think we're nuts and of course always ask which room is the sex room! Anyone want to guess?
NELLY!!! This is too funny! I agree that it's the way to go!
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First I was reading Nelly's advice post and was thinking of how cool it was and how close it sounded to my boyfriend and I, then... I read about seperate bedrooms, etc and ME TOO. My bf and I will be together 4 years and have lived together for 3 and never shared a room/bed. I never tell anyone because they make assumptions and say how weird it is. We work different schedules, I looove my sleep, falling asleep watching tv and he gets up early all the time whether working or not. We have a 2 bedroom aparment so we could have our own beds. If you really love someone and are truly meant to be together then you realize that you don't need to spend every "sleeping/ waking" moment with them.
Alot of people think it hurts the intimacy in a relationship but just by reading Nelly's posts you can see that is not the case.
Anyway, too cool that we have this in common, hard to talk about with many people...... you guys are great and I am so glad to have found this website!!!!
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Microscopic Colitis, IBS-A, GERD, Hiatal Hernia
Bethany, Ontario, Canada
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Wow, isn't this cool? Two people that I have this in common with! We have rented a 2 bedroom ever since we started living together. We could never share a bed. He would steal all my blankets and take up too much room.
Yes, my friends all assume that we must have some serious issues and that we're from another planet.
How fun is this!
But to be honest, I do wonder if that is a sign of something? Shouldn't a couple sleep together to maintain a close connection and certain level of intimacy? I know that Nelly doesn't seem to have any problems with that.
I will have to admit that my BF is not AT ALL a touchy guy and I wish he were. Anyhow, I'm saying all this because I was just talking about it with someone. Enough said...
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Interesting!!!
#147969 - 02/08/05 06:56 PM
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Kimm
Reged: 03/10/04
Posts: 1171
Loc: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
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This is the first time I've ever heard of happy couples sleeping in seperate rooms. It's very interesting!! I didn't know people actually did this...
I personally couldn't live with my boyfriend and not sleep with him in the same bed...it's just something we both love, falling asleep together, waking up in the middle of the night with his arms around me....when he rolls over in the morning and snuggles me....it's something I just couldn't live without. Just me though....
I think it's pretty cool that you guys can have seperate bedrooms and still maintain such great intimacy....good for you!!!
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That's sweet Kim. I miss that. My last BF and I loved staying in bed together and just cuddling.
Maybe it's time for me to find someone new? And I am serious...
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--------------------
-Sheri
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OK!
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We started to sleep separately last year due to work schedules. My wife gets up shortly after I go to bed, so she sleeps in the 2nd bedroom. Its perfect since I like to watch tv, surf the web, eat, etc. and she can sleep undisturbed. On the weekends we sleep together which is nice. We need a bigger bed though, what once was "cozy" seems cramped after sleeping alone during the week. If the subject ever comes up, I always feel like I have to explain that NO we're not having marital problems it just works out better for us.
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to be honest at first I wasn't sure. I wanted to sleep in the same bed because I just felt closer. I am also more of a touchy person than he is so I guess that is why I had a harder time with it. But now I see his side of it and how we both need our sleep (the little that I am able to get). I guess we are a little selfish. I would not want to wake up to an alarm at 4am when I don't have to get up until 8. Just like he wouldn't want to have me toss around when he is going to bed and I stay up late. I don't feel like it has affected us at all outside of sleeping. We get along great and spend plenty of awake time together. Plus I get ym own closet and can decorate however I want to.
Nobody is perfect but you have to find what works for both of you, for some it doesn't.
Hope you find the answer you need about your relationship sara-sage, we cannot help you with that only help you as you find it yourself. You probably know in your heart what you want, just afraid of what it brings.
Take Care
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Microscopic Colitis, IBS-A, GERD, Hiatal Hernia
Bethany, Ontario, Canada
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Ya, people always assume it means a divorce or breakup is imminent!
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Yes, I love being able to decorate my own room. One of the perks...
I do know what I want to do but it's a scary thing.
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I just had my best friend go through this. People can give you advice and tell you what they think you should do but until you are ready, it won't make a difference. You have to come to the point where you just can't stand it and need to do something for yourself. I don't know you, what you are going through or what your situation is but whatever it is you will come to it on your own time. I can just tell from your reply that you are unsure and nobody likes to feel that way. I just wish you peace of mind and hapiness and courage to do what you need to feel that things are right.
I hope I am not intruding, to think all this from a simple I am bored post on my part lol.
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Microscopic Colitis, IBS-A, GERD, Hiatal Hernia
Bethany, Ontario, Canada
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Thank you so much Bethany! That means a lot to me. I will do something when I am ready.
Thanks.
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SS
#148120 - 02/09/05 08:58 AM
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Kimm
Reged: 03/10/04
Posts: 1171
Loc: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
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Yah like I said...I couldn't live without it!!
How is everything with you and your boyfriend lately? Not trying to be nosy or anything but I remember you guys went through a really rough patch a little while ago.
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No WAY!
#148158 - 02/09/05 10:32 AM
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Nelly
Reged: 08/06/04
Posts: 4381
Loc: Within stray mortar fire of DC
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LOL! Isn't that weird that we've both come to the same conclusion?? My night attacks are virtually nonexistant since I've gotten my own room! Both your rooms look soo tidy, BTW!!! As for sex and geography, every place is great for sex!! Our friends think we're super nuts too, but I had one friend, recently divorced, who looked at me incredously when I told him, and said "Seperate bedrooms!! GENIUS!!"
Always knew you were a smart chick!! I picked my room because it had the attacked bathroom! No brainer!!
~nelly~
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I'm telling you, the women on this board are the most intelligent I've ever met!!!!!!! I always wonder why everyone doesn't do this???
Oh, and I just remember something else-- no arguments about leaving clothes on the floor, hogging the closet, etc!!
~nelly~
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Isn't that funny that people just automatically jump to comclusions!! You've hit onto something smart there, mister!
~nelly~
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...but my BF is not as much! All the more reason to make it count when we do get together and snuggle! I've gone out with guys who just want to mess with me all night long, and it gets irritating to me! I mean, jeesh, him poking me in the back to get me awake is NOT going to put me in the mood, you know! Nothing like having a cranky Nellymonster growling at you first thing in the morning because you stabbed her awake to ruin 2 people's mornings!
~nelly~
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We've been really frisky this weekend. Tee heee.
~nelly~
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...he said, "Well, it's not like I don't know where to FIND you!" ROTFLMBO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~nelly~
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