*sigh*
#136361 - 01/08/05 02:15 PM
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Ravenndark
Reged: 11/28/04
Posts: 531
Loc: the internet
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I know, I'm complaining again, but you girls are the only ones who understand!
Today my friend Kyla (we were best friends before my IBS came along) posted pictures in her online journal, and started talking about how this was "her group" and "her friends", and it made me very sad, because I know if I hadn't been sick, I would have been in those pictures!
They've stopped asking me to join them at lunch, they barely talk to me anymore! They're all awesome people, and they are so worth being with, I just...can't anymore.
At lunch, I sit in the music room, in a CORNER of the music room. I don't even socialize with the other band nerds!
It's been such a bad day.
I hope everybody else's is better. This is the worst my tummy has felt all month!
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Re: *sigh*
#136373 - 01/08/05 03:19 PM
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cailin
Reged: 08/12/04
Posts: 3563
Loc: Dublin, Ireland
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Oh Isabel, that is awful, I can imagine how you are feeling, I have been there. Could you explain to some of your friends that you are sick and that is why you have become removed etc or do you think it has all gone too far? Hopefully there is some hope for the friendship, friends understand these kinds of things, I promise.
Take care and try not to be too sad
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S.
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Hey Ravendark,
Just wanted to let you know that I have been exactly where you are 4 years ago when my ibs started...I promise it wont be like that forever! Unfortunately a few months before I developed ibs a boyfriend of someone at school had got it and I dont know why it was getting spread around but some reason it was...and I knew nothing about ibs at the time...everyone was just saying that he had irritable bowels and they all couldnt help but laugh...granted they were all 14/15 at the time but I remember feeling really uncomfortable that they were mocking him. So anyhows a few months later when I was diagnosed my heart flipped 10 times and I felt sick at the thought of my friends ever finding out! This is probably why am so secretive over it now. Believe me the number of social occasions I missed out on during what should have been some of the best years of my life at school is ridiculous! Im making up for it now believe me! At that time I also didnt have the support of all of you guys so I was so depressed and alone. After having to cancel so many nights out due to my ibs flaring up my friends did exactly the same and just stopped asking me...I can kinda understand when I look back now but at the time I used to cry myself to sleep over it! Infact one time they told me that they thought I just made excuses cos I was 'afraid' to go out behind my parents back(we were obviously underage)...and I just thought god if only that was my problem Id be so bludy happy!
Anyway, I am now about to turn 20 next week, am at uni living with the best friends Ive ever made and although they dont quite know I have ibs they are very understanding about my 'stomach problems' and Ive got so much more confidence to go out and stuff now than I ever did before. Things will get better I promise...and we're all here for you whenever you need us! Id tell your friends you have a chronic disorder if they dont already know...no need to mention it being ibs exactly....and say you've found it hard to deal with. Easier said than done I know. Let us know how things go...hugs xx
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 Natalie
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Re: *sigh*
#136389 - 01/08/05 04:35 PM
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ptillen
Reged: 06/27/04
Posts: 406
Loc: Milwaukee WI
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I'm a high school teacher and a former high school student 
and this is what I say to my students who are in places similar to the one you're in-
life may suck right now, but you can't BELIEVE what an interesting and cool adult you're going to be.
Sounds like small consolation right now, I know, but I hope it might be a little helpful and encouraging to you.
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Isabel,
That's sad. Why is it that you don't hang out with them anymore? Have you been saying no to their lunch invitations? If so, why?
I hope your tummy gets better. But don't isolate yourself. You needs your friends!
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Aww sweetie - I'm sorry! I know school can be so rough sometimes. I agree with Sinead - can you try explaining to them at all what is going on?? I think they would understand. I hope it gets worked out soon for you!
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~Cara~
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My IBS wasn't really bad at high school (I didn't actually know I had it, just thought I had a sensitive tummy) so it didn't really affect my social life that much but I can sympathise with you now. Since d started instead of c I get scared to go places and I can't actually remember the last time I ate in a public place. It does make it hard in regards to friends but I've finally told my whole family (the one I married into) and today they were all really welcoming (I haven't seen them for ages cause I usually cancel get togethers thanks to my tummy). I guess I just decided that it was better they should think I have health problems than think I'm just a snob who doesn't want to know them. I'd tell your friends you have a long term health problem (I used to tell people the doctors weren't sure what was wrong yet). I'm sure they'll understand that and it gives them nothing to gossip about if they don't know exactly what's wrong. I hope you start to feel a bit better soon. As I said I'm sending you big hugs and come complain to us any time you need to.
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Amy
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High school sucks!
#136441 - 01/08/05 09:15 PM
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Angie113
Reged: 12/31/04
Posts: 297
Loc: Alternate b/w Northern and Southern California
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I totally identify with you, it's so hard to be sick like that in high school when you have to see the same people all the time and it's so clique-ish...I didn't have IBS until college, but in high school I had recurrent mono and some other tummy trouble and it was SO hard to never see my friends and just be alone in the house all the time. I lost contact with a lot of people during that time and it was extremely depressing. If you can tell them what's wrong, that will probably help them to at least understand what is going on with you. Also, Paula is right, regardless of IBS, your life will most likely get better after high school.  I hope this helps and you feel better!
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~Angela
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