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Hello Linz
Thanks for your support. I am going to call my Doc on monday. That was a great idea about the brownies. I haven't had Chocolate or coca or sugar in Two weeks. I hope they won't bother me. I am going to send DH to store Tuseday when he is off. I just can't do it with Kenna (my daughter) by my self right now. It is times like these I wish my mom still lived here. She is in AZ now. Thanks Again.
Heather7476
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Heather7476
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Re: Depressed
#99970 - 08/21/04 10:08 AM
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atomic rose
Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)
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I just emailed ya.  If you need more ideas, just let me know!
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I so so feel for you. We ALL understand. Food is such an emotional issue for every human being, a source of connection, nurturing, fun, everything. I have sobbed many a time about this IBS malarky. But it is what it is, and you will reach a point where you will dust yourself off and committ to a diet where finding out what it is that bothers you and what it is that heals you is going to be your mission. During that experimentation you will also have down moments...its a long process and its impossible to stay focused and strong the whole way through. but you WILL do it. And you will become passionate about inventing yummy dishes for yourself.
For now...(and when I go through bad attack times...like right now I am still just eating what you can when you can't eat anything!!)...buy little treats for yourself. I like to buy myself cute, girlie stickers (childish I know), body cream...have a relaxing bath with bubbles and candles and just pamper myself in ways that don't involve food. Put on a pretty top when my husband comes home.
I just got married under two months ago, one month after a stomach virus that most people kicked in one day (I am still suffering two and half months later). I was usually, for ten years, ibs-c and suddenly now, since that virus and ibs-d...its insane. I am a passionate cook and still cook for my husband. It is so sad for me that I can't eat with him, but just watching his enjoyment from the food I make is enough for me. It makes me hopeful too...because I know my ibs is not going to be this bad forever....everyday is a new day of trial and error (tonight I am introducing sweet potato, which I know is safe for everyone, but I am so sensitive at the moment its hard to know!)...and each day will bring surprises...some bad (I can't have chocolate!!!! arrrggghhhhh) and some good (I can have olive oil!!!! woooo hooooo). I just try to focus on the good things I have. I know its not easy all the time, and I let myself feel sorry for myself too (everyone deserves a good sob)...but I then do tell myself that I am not in a wheelchair or dying of terminal cancer. And the good days are appreciated so much...ooooh how wonderful to not feel nauseous.
I know I've been babbling..please hang in there....you have all of us, always, and you WILL get better.
Big hugs and lots of love
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Feel the fear and do it anyway!
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I know what you mean about missing your mum - when you're feeling down you just want to run to her for a big hug and some reassurance. Unfortunately mines at the other end of the country too, but a phone call always leaves me feeling a lot cheerier and she usually talks some sense into me too! I didn't even realise I was depressed, but having been diagnosed with an axiety disorder which has lead to depression I started taking anti-depressants. Although they have by no means provided a quick fix, they have settled things a little and my stomach is tons better - I have eaten things in the last few days that previously I could only dream of. There is hope out there, but it seems that a lot of it is a waiting game - doing what you can to get well, sticking to a safe diet and way of living and then just waiting for your mind and body to heal. I found that a sleep/mood/illness diary really helps to put things in perspective. For example if I have four hours on/off sleep and get really depressed about it, I can read my diary and see that two weeks ago I was lucky to get an hour. Progress is being made although it is slow and everyone has bad days. Take care and don't beat yourself up about not being able to do as much with your daughter - none of this is your fault and you will get better. Food wise I jazz things up with tons of fresh herbs like coriander, mint and basil. I also find that asian flavours are brilliant. Personally I found when I was depressed food stopped tasting of anything for a while so I had to make things really tasty to tempt my palate. There's nothing worse than tasteless fish and white rice when you're already feeling grotty! I also use loads of garlic and ginger as well as soy sauce and black beans.
I hope you start feeling better soon.
Catherine
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Thank you so much. I am already feeling a little more up. I just keep needing to hear it will get better. And that I will be able to have an active life. I feel like Sybil one second I am like I will beat this, it is not going to take my life, I just gotta figure it all out. Then an hour later I am in tears and think my life is forever going to be this pain, and I feel worthless.  My poor DH never knows what to expect when he comes in the door.
Thanks
Heather7476
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Heather7476
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Thank you. I swear without this web site I would have gone crazy weeks ago. I know talking to my mom is always a good idea for me when I am like this. She is the one who made me promise to go to the Doctor. She also makes me feel better about being a mom. She has two little ones to so it is like having a best friend that raised you. My brother and sister are 4 and 3. My mom is turning 50 in Nov. I am going to try to liven up my food this weekend. Even my doctor was like yuk when I told her what I was eating but she said to stay with safe foods just try liven them up.
Thanks for everything
Heather7476
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Heather7476
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I am so sorry you are feeling so low. I think we have all been there at one time or another. Things will get better, I promise.
My first suggestion is to check with your doc about taking an antidepressant. It seems to have helped a lot of people on this board. Sometimes we just need a little help to get started and then things will seem so much better. I'm on Librax for anxiety and it really helps me.
Second suggestion: Could your hubby explain to your daughter that you have tummy aches and that when you feel better you will play with her. Do you ever watch Sesame Street or some other children's show with her? My boys used to love that, especially if I watched it, too. You could even be on the couch with the heating pad but still be spending time with her.
Third suggestion: do you have any friends or family you can talk to or maybe that could even come over and help with your daughter?
Fourth suggestion: when you are in the mood for a subway (yummy by the way) and don't feel like going out, could hubby pick it up for you? That sure would break the pattern of boring chicken. Is there anything you can eat that can be delivered?
Fifth suggestion: do you have any kind of "treat" that agrees with you that you could eat. Mine is "Little Debbie marshmallow pie". I always have one around 8PM as my treat and boy, do I look forward to that.
Sending big hugs your way to feel better soon
Barbie
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Yes - this site really is a life line isn't it. At my lowest moments coming here always puts a smile on my face or makes me see that I am not the only one going through this. It's wierd isn't it - none of this seems real, yet I've been ill for years. Getting advice from people here is so much better than talking to a doctor sometimes, as doctors basically don't have much time to reassure you that you are not a freak.
I have a great deal of respect for people with this illness who have children - I only have enough energy to look after myself and my partner sometimes, although I do feel sometimes that I am missing out on a family life (not that I want children, just a stable family home). I'm getting a puppy soon, and I think thats probably going to be demanding enough!!
Take care, C
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Hi Barbie
I am going to call my Doc on monday and see about getting something for this depression. I have been watching tv with her alot. Tonight i have decided I am going to paint her toe nails hot pink she loves to have her toes painted and it's something only mommy can do . We don't have alot of family aroud here and what we do have all work.My father has know for two weeks that somthing is wrong and hasn't even bothered to call to see if I am alright. My grandparents told him I was sick. My Grandparents are great when the are here but spend alot of time up north, My husbands step mom keeps her when i have a doc app.
My hubby goes and get the subway when he is home but he works till 7:30 at night. He will be having aa lot of time off for vaction soon though. Iam going to try the depression brownies soon. I hope that will help scince I love chocolate. Thanks so much for all your suggestions and support. It realy means alot.
Heather7476
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Heather7476
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Good Luck with the puppy. I have been wanting one but I have to get over my fear of dogs first, we got a 1 year old retriver/sharpa S/P? but it growled at me or daughter all the time then tried to bite her so it had to go. Now I am scared to get one. I was attacked when I was 9 by a German Sheperd. I thought i was way over that but maybe not so much. Good luck With yours let me know what kind you get.
Heather7476
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Heather7476
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