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A question about stability
      #90799 - 07/16/04 09:30 AM
atomic rose

Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)

So after my ranting the other day - and totally not being able to eat ANYTHING yesterday, not even from the "what to eat when you can't eat anything" list - I'm kind of curious.

Could my problems with not feeling better at all yet, after 7 weeks on the diet, be a combination of not being on a high enough SFS dosage yet, and just plain not eating enough?

I have a feeling the answer is "yes", but I just need some encouragement, I guess... I feel like I've lost all hope, and I really want to find some of that again. I've been coasting on the SFS for the past few weeks, but I'm going to increase today. I'm so tired of feeling lousy. I've barely eaten for the past 2 weeks because I just CANNOT eat when my insides are gurgling and cramping. I've lost so much weight that my boyfriend is genuinely afraid for me. I spent a lot of yesterday asleep, because I didn't even have the energy to sit at the computer. My doctor's appointment isn't until Aug. 2, and in the meantime, I'm so miserable that I'm starting to think that jumping off a bridge isn't such a bad idea.

By the way, I did finally get an appointment with a therapist - I go this Monday morning. I'm still not convinced they can really do anything to help me, but I'm at a point where I'll try ANYTHING that I can afford. I don't think I've ever been so low.

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Re: A question about stability new
      #90836 - 07/16/04 10:10 AM
LauraSue

Reged: 01/14/04
Posts: 4812
Loc: New York City

Yes, and yes. That could be exactly the problem.

You HAVE TO EAT, Casey! Otherwise your tummy will be trying to do its thing and have nothing to work on so it will spazz! Also just to stay alive one does generally need to eat! j/k! How about setting up a food plan to make sure you get at least 1000 calories a day?

Ditto on the SFS. It helps give your tummy something to do its thing on so it doesn't get rumbly grumbly. Set yourself a plan on that too. And report in to me on the Vegas board, okay?

THERE IS HOPE!! This plan works when you work it, so work it, you're worth it! (And stay away from bridges, okay??!!)

Feel better sweetie, it's just the disease talking, not reality.

--------------------
Laura
Keep it simple!

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Casey... new
      #90842 - 07/16/04 10:16 AM
ChristineM

Reged: 05/31/04
Posts: 1662
Loc: soCal

I just want to say I'm so sorry that you're struggling so much right now! You DEFINITELY need to eat! Please force yourself to, even when the tummy is grouchy!

We're all pulling for you! Maybe the therapist can work with you on relaxation techniques or how to not fear food when you feel like this...

Sending good thoughts your way!

--------------------
Christine

Those who can do; those who want it done better teach.

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Re: A question about stability new
      #90844 - 07/16/04 10:20 AM
Sheri01

Reged: 04/19/04
Posts: 1731
Loc: New Jersey

definately eat something! If even you are just eating plain bread! I found that my 'D' attacks will seem to stop sooner and be less painful if I eat bread. bagels and pretzels have always been my life savers when I have been really sick.
Just have hope that this WILL stop oneday. I used to be as bad as you and there WAS an end to it, but it's hard not to get really depressed when you have to live through it.
If you starve yourself you will feel ALOT worse, that I know from experience.
Good luck, and just hang in there!
Also remember to drink lots of water for strength

--------------------
-Sheri

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Re: A question about stability new
      #90852 - 07/16/04 10:34 AM
Saralou

Reged: 10/18/03
Posts: 62
Loc: Maryland

Hey Casey-

I am sorry that you are feeling so low (physically as well as mentally). I can relate to wanting to jump off a bridge when the pain gets particularly bad. There have been times where I think that if the rest of my life has to be like it is when the pain is very bad, continuous and seemingly never-ending, that I rather end it all now. I mean, who wants to live like that, right? But here's the thing, as bad as the pain can be at times, or in this case, all the time, it does not feel as bad as your loved ones would if you did end up jumping off a bridge...
From reading some of your past emails, I gather that you do not eat enough. You may very well eat frequently throughout the day, but that does not mean that you are getting enough calories/nutriets, etc.
When you say that you are feeling bad, do you mean that you are not able to go to the bathroom (or are going too much if you are D) or do you mean the pain is so bad? I can tell you right now that you have to eat even when you are not hungry or are in pain. Stick to ff saltine crackers, white rice, oatmeal, etc. for a good 3-4 days (forget the fruits and veggies). When you feel a little better, start incorporating other soluble fiber (sweet potato, cooked carrots, beets, bananas, mangoes, peeled apple, etc.) Once you start feeling even better, then add a small amount of insoluble fiber (and I mean small, at the end of your meal). If you do not do so already, try keeping a journal for the next 2 weeks or so where you write down not only everything that you eat or take and at what times, but whether you have had a bm that day, how much water you consumed, how well or poorly you slept, how you felt mentally, anything out of the ordinary that occurred, if you worked out, etc...to see if there is something that you are possibly missing.
But just as important, if not more, remember that your mental state plays a HUGE role in how your body will feel. I can rarely remember a time when I was in pain, when I was not upset, sad, down, stressed (even if I did not know it). I had a a lot of difficulty believing that my mind could have such an effect on my body...but it does (and I know that eating poorly in college and drinking and having eating disorders did not help my case either). Get as much sleep as you can, pump yourself up mentally by doing things that you enjoy, even if you do not feel 100% and tell yourself that you will feel better (cuz you will). I mean it Casey and I cannot emphasize it enough. Today, and the past while might have been a low point, but there are definitely high ones to come, you just have to make yourself believe it. It's normal to get down about life, we all do, and it's normal to get done about the pain, we all do that too, but you have to remember that this is only temporary and that you can and will get better.
I have been doing the hypno tapes and feel that they are helping me. I also stopped taking my birth control and think that helps too. I take a walk after every morsel of foon I eat, even if only up and down the hall. I excercise everyday and drink plenty of water (which I know you do too). I take 2 fibercon 3xs/day, and take 2 digestive enzymes and 1 pep pill before every meal.
If you ever want to talk about anything (either IBS related or not) please do not hesitate to email me...I'll be here if you want to chat.
Good luck and try as much as you can to keep your spirits high. Know that as much as it does not feel like it sometimes, you are not alone in this.

Sara

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Thanks, Sara... new
      #90865 - 07/16/04 11:35 AM
atomic rose

Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)

I know I'm not eating enough. My main problems right now are nausea and fear. On the rare occasion that I'm not nauseated, I'm scared to death to eat anything beyond rice and crackers. I've been eating the "what to eat when you can't eat anything" diet for the past 2 weeks, but leaving out fruits (including the ones that everyone else finds "safe", like bananas and applesauce) and most veggies (I'm ok with carrots). I do keep a food journal.

The fear is why I'm hoping the therapist will be able to help me. If she can't, I hope she'll at least be quick to send me off to a psychiatrist to be medicated. I've been struggling with this since January and I'm tired.

I literally, honestly, can't afford the hypno program. If I could, I would have bought it back when I first found the boards and saw the rave reviews for it. I believe it'll help me. However, I can't afford it.

Anyway, I'm just kind of rambling... I know I didn't even address everything you mentioned. Thanks for all the suggestions and kind words of support.

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LS! new
      #90868 - 07/16/04 11:39 AM
atomic rose

Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)

Well, you got me to laugh, anyway. Heh. I know, one typically does need to eat to stay alive.

I will actually take your suggestion to report on the Vegas board. I thought that keeping a food journal was going to be enough to "motivate" me to eat even when I don't feel like eating, but it really isn't. Maybe if I have to go public with how little I'm forcing down, it'll eventually make me eat more. (I'm not articulating this well, but you know what I mean, I hope.)

And I'm increasing my SFS today. It was a "duh" moment this morning, for sure.

Thanks for the advice! I'm not normally this low and blah and defeated, I'm really not... I know it's just the disease talking.

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Re: A question about stability new
      #90874 - 07/16/04 11:57 AM
atomic rose

Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)

I do nosh on ff saltines, pretty much all the time. And most of the time, I manage to eat a little rice cereal in the morning, after I've been awake for an hour or so. The really stupid part about this is that I'm not having a lot of D, or even a lot of C. It happens, but not every day. I just never feel like eating. But yes, I know I have to force myself to.

It's encouraging for me to hear that you used to be as bad, and that you're better now... that gives me a little hope. Thank you.

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Re: LS! new
      #90877 - 07/16/04 12:02 PM
LauraSue

Reged: 01/14/04
Posts: 4812
Loc: New York City

There ya go, chica!! And now your reward. My favorite yummy when I can't eat anything else? A piece of white bread with honey drizzled on it, folded in half, eaten standing up in the kitchen. I don't know why that last part is so important, but it is!! It's like I have to trick my mind into thinking I'm NOT eating!! he he

I know you're not usually this low. That's why I figured if I could make you laugh, it would help!

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}}}}}}

--------------------
Laura
Keep it simple!

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To Casey new
      #90881 - 07/16/04 12:16 PM
Saralou

Reged: 10/18/03
Posts: 62
Loc: Maryland

Casey...would you mind giving me your phone # or personal email address...OR would you call/email me if I gave you mine?

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To Sara... new
      #90891 - 07/16/04 12:30 PM
atomic rose

Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)

My email's in my profile. (Just click on my username, above my picture.) I'm not much of a phone person, heh.

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Re: So sorry Casey! new
      #90896 - 07/16/04 12:48 PM
Wookie

Reged: 04/01/04
Posts: 247
Loc: n/a

I just hate that for you!! But I wanted to add that keeping my tummy full of something is always good for me. An empty stomach causes me IBS trouble. I just eat small healthy things every 2-3 hours. But I am a Cer so I don't know if there is a difference between the two. I would increase the dosage of SFS too, but that is just me. I hope you get releif soon sweetie!

--------------------
~Wookie

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Geez, Casey new
      #91021 - 07/16/04 06:30 PM
barbie

Reged: 04/22/04
Posts: 2435
Loc: Texas

It makes me so sad that you are feeling so low.

I don't like to see you get down on yourself like that. I agree with the others that you need to eat a little something.. Maybe several small meals throught the day. Is there anything you like that agrees with you like maybe toast & jelly or peanut butter or graham cracker or chicken noodle soup or just a little something to put in your tummy. I think you would feel better. You are just so weak you can't think straight.

If I were there I would give you a great big hug and I bet you would feel lots better. Now, come on and let's see a smile. Now, doesn't that make you feel better.

I have great hope that you will be getting better very soon. Remember we are always here for you.

Barbie

--------------------


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Aww, Barbie new
      #91025 - 07/16/04 06:56 PM
atomic rose

Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)

I smiled! I smiled! And I do feel a little better.

I forced myself to eat today. Still just tiny bits every couple hours, but it's better than I've been doing. I think I feel better. And ya know, chicken noodle soup is exactly what I went for first, heh.

*hugs* to you... thank you for the cheering-up.

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Re: Casey... new
      #91026 - 07/16/04 06:58 PM
atomic rose

Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)

Thank you for the good thoughts. Every time I have a day like this, I'm SO thankful that I found this board... there's nothing like input and support from people who really understand. Thanks!

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Karen... new
      #91027 - 07/16/04 07:01 PM
atomic rose

Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)

I'm sorry to hear you aren't doing so well either... I hope you're feeling a little better by now.

I did force myself to eat today, even if only some chicken noodle soup, crackers, mashed potatoes, and rice. It isn't very appetizing, and that's probably part of the problem. But my energy level's up a little and I'm thinking a little more clearly, and I know you're right - not eating is just making the problem worse. Looks like I'm going to have to get used to forcing myself to eat, too.

Anyway, you hang in there too, and I hope you're doing better!

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Re: A question about stability new
      #91029 - 07/16/04 07:02 PM
Vicam

Reged: 02/24/04
Posts: 1955
Loc: Ontario, Canada

Hey Casey,

I'm so sorry you're feeling so lousy...you sound a lot like me, I've been really faithful to the diet but just cannot seem to stabilize. You mentioned a doctor's appointment...have you been "officially" diagnosed with IBS yet? Or are you just assuming that's what you have?

Small meals is probably a really good idea, and I've found that taking a probiotic has really helped me. Sadly, I don't have a lot of suggestions because I'm in the same boat, the weight is just falling off me. I try and just squeeze something small in whenever I can.

Do you have any sort of painkiller you could try? Even just regular tylenol? Maybe it would take the edge of the cramping a bit and allow you to eat a little more?

I feel for ya...I really hope you feel better soon
Kelly

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Re: A question about stability new
      #91032 - 07/16/04 07:32 PM
atomic rose

Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)

Hey Kelly,

I know. Every time I read one of your posts, I think, gosh, she sounds a lot like me. I think I whine more than you do, though. LOL I don't seem to have the problems with pain that you're having right now.

Here's where I get all embarassed, but yes, at this point I'm kind of assuming I have IBS. I haven't been diagnosed yet. All my life, any doctor I've seen has told me that it's all in my head, so I'm hoping this next try will be different. I decided to try the diet because I had actually done it once before, years ago, and it worked WONDERS. Back then, I had just been diagnosed with gallstones, and my GI doc urged me not to have surgery, because I was very obese. He recommended a low-fat diet... I did it, the weight came off, the gallbladder settled down, and the D/C/nausea problems virtually went away. When I started having symptoms again, I figured it couldn't hurt to try eating like this again... and it *can't* hurt, it just doesn't seem to be helping as quickly as I think it should.

Now that you know my life story... heh.

I forced myself to eat today, and other than feeling incredibly full, I feel better than I have in at least a week. It's obvious that I can't wait for myself to "feel like eating", I just have to make myself eat. I'm not having more pain when I do eat, I just start to get afraid of food and avoid it as much as possible. But I will try some Aleve for the cramping next time, I think.

Thanks, and I hope you're feeling better soon too.

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Re: Hope for the future new
      #91074 - 07/16/04 11:51 PM
CathUK

Reged: 05/25/04
Posts: 373
Loc: Cambridge, UK

I really hope you are feeling a bit better today. My friend was just like you three years ago. She had struggled with IBS and literally became afraid to eat - and doctors just kept saying she was anorexic. She did get over it though - the other day I went round to her house and found her tucking in to a tub of ice-cream!!!

Personally I find that I become so scared to try something new it actually makes me sick even though there is nothing in it to act a trigger. Hence an all night panic attack once because there was a tiny bit of cocoa powder in something!!! If you think it is going to hurrt, it generally will, as you tense up and clench your stomach. I also find I can con myself into eating by going for a walk and eating on the run so to speak - there's nothing worse than staring a a bowl of food feeling like you are going to throw up, so this provides a distraction.

Is there a reason you can't eat bananas - they have been my complete life saver (I am IBSD/pain). I find they are the only things I can tolerate in the morning.

Give the therapy a chance - you might need other help as well though. You are bound to be feeling low just because this is a miserable way to live for so long.

Please, please, please take care - or I will be forced to send you sewing kits across the atlantic to cheer you up!



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Re: Hope for the future new
      #91080 - 07/17/04 06:36 AM
atomic rose

Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)

Quote:

Personally I find that I become so scared to try something new it actually makes me sick even though there is nothing in it to act a trigger. Hence an all night panic attack once because there was a tiny bit of cocoa powder in something!!




I've kind of wondered if that's part of my problem, because it seems like a lot of things I've been able to eat for years are suddenly "bothering" me - soy products, egg whites, things that don't make ANY sense, or that are in such tiny amounts in my recipes that they honestly shouldn't make that much of an immediate difference. Hmm.

I guess I'm feeling a little better today. I forced myself to eat yesterday, and I lived to tell the tale. I've definitely found that, until I get the anxiety under control, my eating habits have changed - I can't eat sitting at the table, I either have to be watching TV or on the computer, and immediately after I'm done, I have to get up and clean up, so I'm not sitting there thinking about how I feel and getting paranoid about it. Whatever works, I suppose, right?

I can't eat bananas because they give me wicked heartburn/indigestion. It doesn't matter how ripe or unripe I eat them, I end up burping banana for several days. Blech.

Anyway, thank you for the support and encouragement. I think I'm feeling a little better today. I'm hopeful about the therapy, and at least I don't have to wait too long for that appointment.

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Re: A question about stability new
      #91094 - 07/17/04 08:19 AM
Kimmy

Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 76
Loc: Upstate New York

Dear Casey,

I am soooo sorry you feel so bad. As you can see, many people care for you and we all feel bad when you do to.

I'm with Doe, I have to eat many times a day to keep my stomach happy. I am 5'4", weigh 105 lbs. and eat constantly. I eat three good meals a day (SFS before each meal) and snack at least every hour and half in between (rice cakes, bread, chex, cheerios etc.). It was difficult for me to get to this point because like you, I haven't felt hungry in a very long time. I make myself eat even when I don't want to. When my IBS was very bad I dropped under 98 lbs. and my husband forced me to eat more often - crackers, toast, rice, etc. - and this actually helped a great deal.

I've always had a high metabolism but it evened out as I got older (I'm 40 now and weighed 115 before the IBS got bad) and for the last 5 years I had to start watching what I ate. The great thing about Heather's diet besides the IBS benefits is that it is so nutritious, healthy and weight stabilizing.

I hope you feel better soon and that today is a better day. You are one of the first to help others when they are feeling bad and you are quite a special lady!

Take good care of yourself and let me know how you are.

Kim

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Re: Hope for the future new
      #91100 - 07/17/04 08:35 AM
LauraSue

Reged: 01/14/04
Posts: 4812
Loc: New York City

Hey, Casey, darlin! Glad you're feeling better.

Just a side note on the banana thing. That may actually be a food allergy. But whether it's a true allergy or just an intolerance, you should also watch out for avocados and latex (rubber gloves at dentist gave me burning pain in my lips for two days -- they now use vinyl for me!! Oh, and diaphrams also. EWWW.)

--------------------
Laura
Keep it simple!

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CASEY! new
      #91238 - 07/17/04 11:46 PM
jenX

Reged: 08/11/03
Posts: 3252
Loc: Richmond, VA

i'm sorry that you're not doing well. that's not good at all. let's see what we can do to fix this!

listen, when i was really sick and out of work for a few months, i was MISERABLE and wasn't eating at all, either. terrible! what i noticed was helpful was actually concentrating on getting protein, even if it was just a few bites every few hours. make a schedule if you have to. make some rice and chicken and take a few bites as often as you can force yourself to do so. once i started concentrating on the protein, i found i had more energy. it was a nice postive cycle. i had finally decided to do the opposite of what i did when i started feeling sick (which was cut out foods and eat less frequently).

i know you're working really hard to get better. i'm really proud of you, if it doesn't sound too condescending.

so... protein. can you handle soy? there are soy protein powders at the health food stores. you can mix them in with sauces and stuff. maybe make some kind of pasta you can eat periodically and juice up the sauce with extra protein? throw some soy cheese on your bread?

speaking of bread, have you been screened for celiac? that's something that they should check if they haven't yet. i tested negative, but i still cut out wheat for a while (i concentrated on eating potatoes, sweet potatoes, pumpkin and rice as my soluble fiber bases). actually, it was a few months! i really noticed an improvement. i seem to be back on the wheat now just fine, so i don't know what that was about, whether i have a wheat intolerance or not. but it's something to look into, testing-wise.

hmm... what else?

i know you've cut all the triggers because you're hardly eating at all. have you tried fennel tea? i was downing fennel tea a lot during that time i was concentrating on upping the protein. damn, was i determined to get back to some semblance of normal! i had a cup of fennel tea in front of me at all times and i also had a hot water bottle or heating pad on my stomach most waking hours. those things helped a lot, i think. they helped relax my insides physically, but they also made me feel nice and calm. concentrate on pampering yourself! (and the protein)

also, with regards to the SFS, at the time i was doing all the stuff above, that's when i started with the acacia. i added it really slowly, but i was really regular with taking it. i never missed a dose. i was considering it my job! maybe you'll find more relief now that you're working on that?

if you need some incentive to eat more frequently, remember that Heather even says that you can feel worse if you don't have stuff in your tummy. it's important to make sure you have soluble fiber in your colon at all times. when it's full, the contractions are at least pushing something along instead of just grabbing on to nothing.

so, your homework: grab some fennel and make a lot of tea and go eat something! please report back with your progress. i already told Kelly i want her to gain a few pounds before Fall. now i'm telling you the same thing. don't make me come up there and hurt you!

--------------------



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Re: CASEY! new
      #91258 - 07/18/04 06:58 AM
atomic rose

Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)

I'm actually feeling a lot better today, after 2 days of actually EATING. Go figure. Heh.

You definitely have a good point about the protein. I'm trying to at least eat some chicken every day - I noticed the same thing you did, that a little protein goes a long way to making me feel SO much better almost immediately. I'm kind of afraid of soy right now. I don't know if it was coincidence or not, but I've had "bad days" the day after any time I'm tried to eat something soy. (But I've been eating soy for years with no problems, so how does that make any sense? Is it in my head?)

I haven't been tested for celiac yet, but I will be. I'm kind of curious about celiac, though - if I had it, wouldn't wheat products always or almost-always bother me? I had worried that it might be that too, and when I first started the diet, other than crackers, I didn't eat anything wheat, but now that I'm eating a little more regularly again, I have no problems with it. Hmm.

Anyway, thank you for the encouragement and suggestions (and NO, you didn't sound condescending!). It's awful that so many of us have gone through a similar situation, but it makes me feel a little better to see that others have gotten over it and eat like normal human beings again. You won't have to come up here to hurt anyone, I promise. LOL!

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Good for you, Casey new
      #91260 - 07/18/04 07:34 AM
barbie

Reged: 04/22/04
Posts: 2435
Loc: Texas

Hi Casey

I'm so happy to hear that you are feeling better. See, you do feel better after eating something. GREAT!!!!! I bet you are getting a little strength back, too, huh???
Keep up the good work.

Barbie

--------------------


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whew! new
      #91295 - 07/18/04 10:17 AM
jenX

Reged: 08/11/03
Posts: 3252
Loc: Richmond, VA

i'm so glad that you're feeling a little spunkier with some food in ya. i think when some of us get that terribly sick we get so gun-shy that we forget the whole point of eating is to keep us alive. or, at least, i think i forgot that. i was so shocked at how much better i felt when i was eating. boy, that's a simplistic thing... you'd think i'd remember it, now wouldn't you!?

as for the soy--- i dunno. i usually end up doing better with it if i have it with a soluble fiber. maybe that's the key? who knows.

breadwise, i think the whole wheat intolerance thing is more insidious than any other food allergy thing. i noticed that cutting out wheat gradually made a difference. it wasn't something where if i ate a bagel i felt sick right away. i don't know how much you know about celiac, but if you're bored and looking for some reading material, check out celiac.com. not by any stretch of the imagination am i suggesting that you have wheat issues, i'm just mentioning the site since it's so good and we're on the subject. anyway, from understanding the mechanics of how celiac works, i believe that wheat is a slow-damage sort of thing for those who can't tolerate it.

enough babbling. i'm going to go check out the movie schedule and see what's out there. have a good day, Casey!

--------------------



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