Boyfriend moving in... you know what that means
#220943 - 10/24/05 10:43 AM
|
|
|
|
fishnets
Reged: 10/09/03
Posts: 515
Loc: MA
|
|
|
That means I need to be symptom free!! And I need some C people to help me. I've said in a couple other posts that I'm pretty stable, but when I say that I don't mean totally. I'm able to not take an SFS anymore, and I eat pretty much what I want (except try to eat lowish fat, and avoid whole grains). Because of this eating with abandon, I do get a little gas and bloating, but I consider it worth it. For example I love apples, and I eat them (with the peels) like twice a day, no soluble fiber with it...so it does give me gas/bloating, but it's not enough that makes me not want to eat them. Except now my boyfriend is going to be moving in, and I can't be having "managable" gas and bloating, I need to have none! So I need some help reeling myself back into the diet a bit.
I'm not sure if I should watch my diet better, or start taking an SFS again, I feel like I probably wouldn't have to do both. I'm wondering what would be more annoying...eating more strictly, or having to take fiber drinks each day.
I dunno, can I get some C people to remind me of some smarter choices of eating? I eat too much insoluble!
--------------------
IBS-C
Edited by fishnets (10/24/05 10:44 AM)
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
As long as you aren't C, then I don't understand the problem. None of us are ever completely free of gas and bloat, boyfriend, husband or whoever lives with us doesn't cure that! And if this is the "real" thing, and longterm, he better get used to gas, bloat and everything else....comes with the package when you are IBS.
I don't mean to be short or opinionated, but just because he's moving in doesn't mean your gas and bloat are going anywhere no matter what you eat, don't eat, take, don't take...you might improve it some, but if you have IBS, you're stuck with it and so is he. Actually, sharing your home with him might make it worse since stress comes with with the package of sharing your life with someone...I guess I'm "venting" because I wouldn't want anyone living with me that couldn't accept me like I was. IBS and all.
--------------------
God is Faithful!
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
I'm sorry, but you can't cure IBS. You're still going to have the occasional attack and bloating, etc. Your boyfriend does know this, right? If not, you can either tell him now or he's going to find out ASAP!
I think you know what to do to be more stable. If you like the apples, have some soluble fiber with them or peel them or both. Make sure you are drinking lots of fennel tea and peppermint tea if you don't have acid. Have some sort of stress relief program. Exercise daily.
At least for me, there's nothing that brings on an attack quicker than trying to hide my IBS!
--AC
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Yeah, I mean I know he's not going to care if I'm bloated or whatever, I know it's stupid cause I know he loves me, but I just feel paranoid about stuff like that around him! I'm very self concious about all those kinds of things. I guess I just feel nervous. I only recently told him I have IBS, but I told him I don't have the bowel symptoms(lol I'm sure he knows I do but am just self concious, he's not dumb). I've never in my life farted infront of him, and I'm just wondering what will happen if we're living together and I have an attack  I guess I'm really just venting too, cause I don't expect anyone here to fix me.
Oh and I hate fennel tea and can't have peppermint(GERD).
--------------------
IBS-C
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
I'm not an expert at co-habitation, but I'm not that far away from where you are now, either.
To put it bluntly: you're going to fart in front of him... eventually, it's going to happen  lol. I totally understand where you're coming from though with the paranoia and the self-consciousness (gawd, when we moved in together just using the bathroom - and uh, the "noises" - was terribly of stressful for me! I got over that one pretty quickly, heh).
All I'm saying though is that you'll get used to each other's smells and noises and problems and ideosyncracies and such pretty quickly. Maybe not capital-R "Romance" but really, it brings you closer (in a funny, smelly, silly kind of way, lol). And I'm sure he'll be understand (and probably be very helpful and consoling) when you have symptoms - and I'm sure he'll be ok with it. IBS is embarassing, but I've found having someone I can share that embarassment (to a certain extent - i.e. a person I know in person, not just you guys on the boards!) is really helpful. Like, my partner is the person I don't have to worry about being embarassed in front of, and that's a huge stress removed for me. Certainly, it took time to get to this comfortable place - but you WILL get there. It's kind of inevitable, because everyone gets sick at some point and everyone farts and everyone's bodies do gross things etc... and when you live with someone, you get to see that, like it or not 
...lol ok I bet I'm just really selling you on the whole romantic living together thing here aren't I? LOL Really. It's wonderful. You'll see 
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Think about it this way:
If you've ever been front spoon, chances are you've not just farted in front of him, but farted ON him in your sleep. My boyfriend tells me this is extremely amusing....
Try not to worry about it. Boys know we fart. They love it because they get to hassle us about it when it happens. And then they get to fart in front of you, and everyone's more comfortable. And farting is still hilarious, no matter how old I get.
--------------------
*Emma*
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I'm the same as you about never wanting to fart in front of a guy. My parents have been married 35 years and I know they keep their private business private, and excuse themselves to another room or the bathroom if they are gassy. I've never lived permanently with a bf but have traveled a ton and visited a lot, and I can say gas-x is a life saver. I have probably 8 -10 a day and they are excellent. Try that, see if it helps. Watch out because some of the brands contain sorbitol, so if you're sensitive to artificial sweeteners you might want to avoid that.
I don't have your post in front of me so can't remember if you can't have fennel or just don't like it. If it's the latter, I reccommend adding a bunch of honey or even another flavor of herbal tea bag (not peppermint because of your gerd) and seeing if you can take it in that way. It's pretty helpful.
--------------------
Amanda
I live in the Big Apple, but I don't eat the skin
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
So has he ever farted in front of you? Eaten something off and had to spend the evening in the toilet? If he hasn't, well, lucky for him; otherwise, don't hold yourself to higher standards than he holds himself to!
Women are human beings and we have digestive systems. Anyone who doesn't accept that should live far from other people.
--AC
p.s. Try mixing fennel with other herbs - you can barely taste it if you have strong enough teas. A fruit tea from Celestial Seasonings might be a great mixer!
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Hey, I just dealt with this issue a couple days ago! My boyfriend knows about my IBS, & is totally supportive. Well, the other day, he accidentlly knocked his head on a cupboard, & in response to the pain, he laughed. Well, he laughed just hard enough to let one out right in front of me, he was totally embarassed. I just held him & laughed.
After I let him go, he left the room laughing, & then came back. He hadn't gotten over it. So I let him know that I had let one go earlier while we were cuddelling just to console him. It's just a part of life. I've found that the
more you tell a person, the more they are able to accept it. It just makes it easier to deal w/ if your up front about it. He's goona have to deal with it!! Sometimes it's easier if you can just joke about it. Give it a try!! Kee
--------------------
Kiwi
IBS-C
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
This reminds me of an episode of "Sex in the City" where there's a lot of "taboos" adressed. Carrie farts in front of Big. There's also a bathroom door open/shut sequence with Miranda and co. (I still adore that show!!!)
I guess the point is to a.) be honest/up front and to have a sense of humour about it all.
Also, ENZYMES, Beano, Gas-X, Fennel Tea, Immodium, etc., etc. are effective. Ditto for hypno., yoga, some exercise that appeals to you...
Doesn't it feel GOOD to successfully follow Heather's diet guidelines, as well? It can definitely make a huge difference in the number of attacks and the recovery time.
Best wishes,
Kate, IBS-D.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
Posts
