Board clogger- sorry!! Highly sensitive people revisited:
#193643 - 07/09/05 12:41 PM
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_Willow
Reged: 04/06/05
Posts: 2090
Loc: Canada.
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I can't recall now who originally posted this, but it's very interesting as well, and another reason to make us feel akin to one another....
The highly sensitive person is often said to be more aware or affected by sensory stimuli. See if you fit any of these criteria (I know I do!):
That which I'm affected by is listed afterwards, in red.
I am easily overwhelmed by strong sensory input.
Other people's moods affect me.
I find myself needing to withdraw during busy days,into bed or into a darkened room or any place where I can have some privacy and relief from stimulation.
I am made uncomfortable by loud noises.
I startle easily.
My nervous system sometimes feels so frazzled that I just have to go off by myself.
I make a point to avoid violent movies and TV shows.
I am bothered by intense stimuli, like loud noises or chaotic scenes.
When I was a child, my parents or teachers seemed to see me as sensitive or shy.
I am easily overwhelmed by strong sensory input.(things like strobe lights or BIRDS chirping at 4 AM make me MENTAL.)
Other people's moods affect me. (I'm a mood stealer! I know others feelings often before they do themselves.)
I am bothered by intense stimuli, like loud noises or chaotic scenes.(people arguing make me want to throw up or nervous poop)
I startle easily. (uh, TOTALLY!)
I am made uncomfortable by loud noises.(depends-I teach, so loud kids, no. Loud adults who yell across a room really stress me out. teenagers too!LOL! But I used to be the loud one.)
When I was a child, my parents or teachers seemed to see me as sensitive. (I was never shy, well...now moreso than ever before. sensitive? Cry at the drop of a hat? Easily made worried? Yep.)
Do you see yourself in any of this, esp. new ppl who haven't seen this?? It was almost freaky to first read this...Lightbulb moment!
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I am easily overwhelmed by strong sensory input. Sometimes - it depends on what it is.
Other people's moods affect me. Yes - especially if they are negative moods - angry, stressful - things like that.
I find myself needing to withdraw during busy days,into bed or into a darkened room or any place where I can have some privacy and relief from stimulation. I do - I disliked it when we travel because hotels don't offer any real privacy for me. There is no place I can get away to. It is also the time where we are around the most crowds, noise and stress.
I am made uncomfortable by loud noises.
I startle easily. Sometimes. I would rather have it quiet - though sometimes I play music somewhat loud - when I am cleaning.
My nervous system sometimes feels so frazzled that I just have to go off by myself.
I make a point to avoid violent movies and TV shows. Well - I like to watch some shows where they catch the bad guys - but where there is a lot of gore and bad violence - no.
I am bothered by intense stimuli, like loud noises or chaotic scenes. Yes - I am. I like it pretty quiet and still. Too much constant noise might even bring on an attack - because it will stress me out.
When I was a child, my parents or teachers seemed to see me as sensitive or shy. Yes - I was very shy.
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I fit these criteria 100% -- but, I guess I am kind of cynical about "personality" types, because in a list like that, if you have one trait you're bound to at least somewhat identify with the others. Every time I take one of those personality tests I always end up some bizarre type that they say .00062% of the population belongs in and that my ideal career is to become a mortician.
OK, here's something I do that I think is probably really freaky. I am super-sensitive -- I cry at anything. But I will also inadvertently keep embellishing on a stray worry until I arrive at some horrible conclusion.
Example -- I'll worry about my husband not showing up somewhere, and think about what if he got in an accident, and imagine a state trooper coming to the door with a somber look and a "ma'am, maybe you should sit down first", and then imagine the gaping hole of despair within me of having him gone, and trying to come up with money for the funeral, and then being stuck with this half-remodeled house where most of it is torn apart, and trying to sell it --
And then my husband will walk in the door and ask me why I look so depressed. I try to explain to him that he's dead and that I've lost $35,000 on the sale of the house, but he looks at me like I'm nuts.
OK, I just read that over, and I really am nuts. Or maybe I am exceptionally Special and Sensitive. Really.
Does anyone else find this gremlin creepy? 
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jen
"It's one of the most serious things that can possibly happen to one in a battle -- to get one's head cut off." -- LC
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Sorry, I know it's not really funny, but I'm sitting here laughing. This morning, my late aunt's house in Alabama blew away in Dennis and so my brother decided he wanted to sell after all, so we had to unwind the property deal we all did with my aunt's estate and my cousin didn't want to and since the property lines are screwed up the developers weren't interested and we couldn't get a good price for the land, but the taxes went up anyhow and ...
Not bad imagining on my part for a storm that hasn't hit yet, huh?
I don't know if you're Super Special and Sensitive, but by my standards you're certainly not creepy or nuts. Of course, that may just mean I'm creepy and nuts, too.
Oh, and I'm sceptical about those personality tests, too. As I said about something else, I think it's partly a function of my age. After a while, you've seen so many of them come and go, you just stop taking them seriously.
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[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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I know the worry over your aunt's house isn't funny, either, but your post did make me laugh. That sounds exactly like something I would be thinking!
Personality tests remind me a little of astrology. It is vague enough to be twisted around into everyone's hopeful conception of himself. Although, I am supposed to be a Leo, and I am just about as un-Leo as you can get. I am kinda more doormat than dominant.
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jen
"It's one of the most serious things that can possibly happen to one in a battle -- to get one's head cut off." -- LC
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Except when ever I do personality things, they tell me I'm akin to Ghandi. Yeah. Except he went on a hunger strike!LOL! I'm on strike -from hunger!
Anyhow, my brain goes eerie places too. When i was a kid my mom came home late from the video store, and I actually freaked out and called there and had her paged because I was sure she was dead, picked up by mommy robbers. My mind works the same, 20 years later.Should my mom have left a 9 year old in charge of a 4 year old? Heck no! But we're all alive.
Anyhow, big digression-I always play out the worst possible scenario, I think it's because we do have very strong intelligence. I really believe that.
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Shannon:
It's embarrassing, but I go months without watching television, even reading the news because it just is too stimulating. In a strange way, I live in a cave. My blinds are covered by black-out drapes, to shut out the light, so that I may effectively "desensitisize." (No, it's not for some occult religious purpose. I am not a vampire, although, in my teens I did go through a Goth phase. Too much light gives me rude headaces. I find I just need to "decompress" or jump into the "void" or the "tunnel."
Why do we perceive things so "intensely?" This is a mystery.
Confession: I haven't been to a movie in YEARS--lighting, specifically strobe problem due to epilepsy. The sound is too loud too. I wear dark glasses a lot of the time. The sensual cacophony overwhelms me. So, small doses of highly stimulating stuff, increasingly so, lately. I feel like an alien or someone from the backwoods of post-modern popular Canadian civilization.
Hsp-highly sensitive people. Interesting.
You're not alone.
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Your comment about astrology reminds me of that old joke:
The man says to the woman, "Tell me your sign so I can read your horoscope."
The woman says, "Don't be ridiculous. I'm a Capricorn and you know we don't believe in that stuff."
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[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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I certainly like your "very strong intelligence" theory. But I never play out good scenarios with the same concentration I give to bad ones. That doesn't seem very intelligent on my part!
I sort of got sidetracked from your original post:
I am easily overwhelmed by strong sensory input. No.
Other people's moods affect me. Not so much anymore. I've learned to detach. This was a conscious effort on my part to change an aspect of my personality I felt was detrimental to me and to the people around me.
I find myself needing to withdraw during busy days,into bed or into a darkened room or any place where I can have some privacy and relief from stimulation.Yes, usually into a book.
I am made uncomfortable by loud noises.No.
I startle easily. No.
My nervous system sometimes feels so frazzled that I just have to go off by myself. No.
I make a point to avoid violent movies and TV shows. Absolutely not. Terminator, Die Hard, Buffy, Stargate SG-1, Fistful of Dollars - you get the idea. I love summer blockbusters - the tackier, the better.
I am bothered by intense stimuli, like loud noises or chaotic scenes. It depends on the type. Human chaos, yes (I rarely watch the news on TV, although I can read about it with no trouble). Natural chaos, movies, intense but structured stimuli (I was a computer programmer), no.
When I was a child, my parents or teachers seemed to see me as sensitive or shy. There's no "seemed" about it - shyness was one of my outstanding characteristics.
There may well be a "highly sensitive" personality type, but I think it can change over time. Deliberate work on personality changes, life experience (there are some events in life where either you toughen up or you go under), and just age can make a world of difference in how we perceive and interact with the world.
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[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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I brought this up initially in "The Living Room" in January- HSP- are you one?
And I would highly recommend that you read the book. It's full of really useful stuff for your mental- emotional well being.
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Quote:
I am easily overwhelmed by strong sensory input. Yes.
Other people's moods affect me. Yes.
I find myself needing to withdraw during busy days,into bed or into a darkened room or any place where I can have some privacy and relief from stimulation. Oh, yeah! I need my cave.
I am made uncomfortable by loud noises. Not really.
I startle easily. No.
My nervous system sometimes feels so frazzled that I just have to go off by myself. Once in a while.
I make a point to avoid violent movies and TV shows. No, I seek them out. 
I am bothered by intense stimuli, like loud noises or chaotic scenes. Not really.
When I was a child, my parents or teachers seemed to see me as sensitive or shy. No. Outgoing and opinionated. I think the pulling away came as an adult due to dealing with IBS and anxiety.
Hm. I guess I'm not as sensitive as I thought. Yay? Lol. 
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without coming out and saying we're all brilliant....LOL!!
I ahve changed much from childhood and am much more sensitive now than then-but was always almost ESP level with feeling other's feelings. Any advice on how to detach? I get way too hurt and involved with ppl-I actually get as intensely involved with friends as with lovers were...and it's really hard to maintain that intense of a friendship. So mine are all at arms length. 
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and why do i always think it's probably right? Oh-it's cause it always says I'm going to be REALLY rich this month. liars. 
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outgoing and opinionated. And easily hurt, spooked and annoyed. But never for long.
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That is so me. I haven't read all the thread yet, but sound v. interesting! 
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Hm...This is interesting.
I am easily overwhelmed by strong sensory input. Sometimes, noise especially.
Other people's moods affect me. Yes.
I find myself needing to withdraw during busy days,into bed or into a darkened room or any place where I can have some privacy and relief from stimulation. I can handle one hectic or two hectic days, but more than that, yeah, I can use quiet and dark space, and NEED it.
I am made uncomfortable by loud noises. Yes
I startle easily. That one comes and goes, but lately, yes, I startle easy.
My nervous system sometimes feels so frazzled that I just have to go off by myself. If I am socializing a lot, after a week or two I need time alone to recharge.
I make a point to avoid violent movies and TV shows. Not really, but I don't seek them out either.
I am bothered by intense stimuli, like loud noises or chaotic scenes. If they are right in front of me, yes. Over the weekend, a neighbor's car alarm went off for about 2 and a half hours straight, for example. Drove me nuts!
When I was a child, my parents or teachers seemed to see me as sensitive or shy. I am still shy.
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Your experience with friendships sounds like mine: either too close or not quite close enough. Boundaries - fusion versus separation and individuation - is a vast, tangled landscape. You might take a look at a book called "Codependent No More" by Melody Beattie. I don't know if it will really apply to you, but it's a place to start and very accessible.
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[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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Hope springs eternal in the human breast;
Man never Is, but always To be blest
I'm pretty sure Alexander Pope didn't have horoscopes in mind when he wrote that, but I think it applies.
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[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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fascinating! I was just reflecting on how I came to develop being so sensitive tummy wise.
I can replay a competely trivial event in my mind over and over, like one time in the supermarket the checker said something snide and now I cant even remember exactly but I am still peeved about it.
I just read in another forum about replacing thoughts we don't want
>>>>>
Like a river, our mental energy is always flowing and needs to constantly 'decide' where to flow. In other words, we need to know what to do, not what to not do. The classic "Don't think of a pink elephant" creates an image in the mind of a pick elephant because the mind has no choice. Once we create an alternative route for our thinking, our mind will take it - for example, we might
decide, "Okay, I'll think of a black dog instead." Link those two together until the neural pattern is fixed and
every time somebody says, "Don't think of a pink elephant", you'll think of a black dog. Not a pink elephant.
<<<<<
I have been doing this for years that every time I think evil violent thoughts about the horrific demise of my husband or kitten, I just start saying Cancel Cancel Cancel over until I forget about it and it usually works.
Also I was a synchro swimmer and we did underwater laps. And I NEVER wanted to know how many strokes it would take so I would push myself and not wimp out and come up for air. So I have to start counting really fast by 2s or 3s or backwards still today to distract me from the real count! (I haven't quite worked back up to the 2 lap/1 breath underwater I could do 20 years ago, but I get about 1 1/3)
I only mind loud people if I am trying to relax, like in the sauna, and I am 98% extrovert so I usually speak up if possible.
I make a point to avoid violent movies and TV shows.
add stupid shows too! I only watch the Simpsons Spongebob & Whos Line I avoid violent stupid movies but smart ones are OK like Pulp Fiction, Matrix, Lock Stock 2 Smoking Barrels
and a so called friend called me fussy once and I can never think of her without thinking that is what she always thinks about me, and I haven't called her in weeks
I hope you all like my post. I might cry if ya don't.
 Christy
and just look at how funny my sig is in this context -thanks Woody
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There's a word for people who think everyone is conspiring against them. I know, perceptive.
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