Woke up with D....
#183640 - 06/05/05 10:01 AM
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Tinkerbelle
Reged: 04/17/05
Posts: 231
Loc: Los Angeles, CA
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I get so confused and upset when I feel like I am doing everything I can and still get sick! I'm sorry if it's overwhelming that I post here so much but I don't know what else to do right now. I'm home all alone and feeling really scared... I haven't had proper D in months, just tons of BMs in the morning. But this morning I woke up, had 4 BMs, starting out solid and getting increasingly more loose, then ate an egg white omlet my dad made me, with all safe ingredients, and then within minutes I had D. I don't understand. Yesterday I don't think I ate enough because I wasn't really hungry, and then I ate toast and avo at like 11:45, then went to bed at like 1:30. I couldn't sleep all night because I was bloated and my tummy was rumbling like crazy and I was cramping. I had one of those nights where I woke every hour. I got up at like 6:30, went to the toliet 4 times, had a banana and probiotic, then went back to bed for an hour... then had the omlet and got D! I'm sure there are some things I did wrong here, but I'm just so incredibly sick of this... Everytime this happens I just cry and cry, because I'm really angry at my body.
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Hey there Tinkerbelle,
I know how you feel. You may very well have been doing everything right. Sometimes, our bodies want to give us a hard time despite our best efforts. Again, please don't worry about posting. Having IBS is traumatic and we are your support group and your cheering squad. When nobody else understand the pain and anguish that accompany this terrible illness, we do. I can remmeber having a HORRIBLE attack about 2 weeks ago after being fairly stable for months and I was a complete and total WRECK. I couldn't stop crying, my husband had to rent a car and drive home early from his job out of town, my parents came over because I was literally suicidal I felt so horrible. I couldn't take care of my baby, all I could do was lie in bed in with pain and terrible D and cry. It passed after about 10 days of misery.
It is those times when we feel like "what did I do wrong?" or "what more can I do?" or "am I going to feel like this forever because I just can't cope?". It is a terrible feeling to feel so bad. You feel so alone, like nobody is there for you and nobody truely understands. You are scared because your body is doing crazy things that hurt you and don't make any sense. I know there were many times when I would ask myself "how in the heck did I get this when I felt perfectly normal the first 32 years of my life.".
I am writing this because I always felt better knowing that others were feeling or felt the same way I did. It helped me not to feel so alone during the bad times. Hopefully, with this diet, you will begin to feel better. It takes time for your body to adjust. I am sure others could give you much better diet advice as I have a different medical condition along with the IBS that precludes me from Heather's diet (with exception to the trigger foods which I stay far far away from).
Please know that we are here for you and know EXACTLY what you are going through.
Dana
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Dana
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Eatng after a period of not eating enough is always tough on your tum...you have to be so gentle. It's so much easier to just try and NOT let yourself get too empty.
I would really recommend taking Immodium as a preventative...try one tablet every morning. REALLY helped me. 
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Hi Tinkerbelle,
You poor thing!!! It sounds like you are having a rough time-Im really sorry to hear that. I agree with Linz words that, after not eating for soem time, your body literally freaks out when you put food and almost doesnt know how to handle it (sees it as foreign) and expels it!!!! Try introducing slowly as you are doing, and I do believe that even in a few days, your body will be able to handle/take in what you feed it.
Im really sorry to hear of your troubles!!!! You are doing a great job with trying to be gentle with your body, and BELIEVE ME, crying is good!!!! haha!!!
Hugs and take care,
Kristen
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1. I adore your hat, Tinkerbelle (I'm totally a hat person having been bald--not by choice)(my hair incidentally just magically grew back--okay, I made a lot of changes that quite likely encouraged the spontaneous regrowth of HAIR! I still hide under hats, bandanas, etc. just because I feel safer, i.e. less anxious and more me)
2. How varied is your diet? Do you rotate what you eat?
3. Could you be sensitive to something that you've been consuming on a daily basis? Egg whites? Avocado? Something in the bread? A preservative? I don't know, I'm probably way off base.
4. I go through phases like you, too. What I do basically is eat mostly really plain rice/sf. Lots of organic no-chicken broth--for the SODIUM. Keep Immodium handy and gastrolyte/pedialyte. Keep your electrolytes in balance.
5. This is really a mystery. Sometimes there is no known explaination.
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My tummy actually feels good. I also took Immodium. I'm totally scared to eat, and this often throws me into a really bad cycle. All I've had today really is a half a piece of toast and a banana (aside from the breakfast eariler), and it's already 2:20. I'm making a potato and may try to have some chicken with it and maybe a little avo. But this is how my IBS eating disorder started- getting an upset tummy, not eating much for 4 days, then cutting out more and more foods each time I do eat. I'm just very sick and tired of this cycle, I JUST WANT TO BE NORMAL AGAIN!
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Sorry you are feeling bad today. We have all been through it that is for sure.
If I am feeling bad and know that I will be home all day I will eat safe foods without worry. If I have D I am at home and it is no big deal. I don't like it but I am home and have quick access to a bathroom. The biggest worry for me is being caught away from home and having an attack.
Try to relax and eat foods that you know won't bother your tummy. I know that my tummy is so sensative that sometimes even if I eat the right things I will feel bad and have D. Are there a couple of foods that you know for sure won't make you have to run to the bathroom or cause stomach cramps? If so then stick with those for a few days.
I hope you are feeling better soon.
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Janey
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I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. You sound like I felt up until about a year ago. BMs that start okay, then repeat and repeat and repeat until there's nothing left but liquid. Hang in there, stick with safe foods, and this will pass.
I agree with Linz that you probably let yourself get too hungry. I've found that if I'm hungry, even the smell or sight of food can trigger my digestive system to start up - and it definitely starts over enthusiastically. Also, it sounds like you didn't rest well last night - before I got reasonably stable on Heather's diet, a sleepless night practically guaranteed diarrhea.
When I get up in the morning, I try to coax my digestive system into starting up slowly and safely by feeding it some soluble fiber. For me, it's applesauce with acacia in it, but anything SF will do. If it's a bad day, I'll pretty much stick with SF stuff - bread, dry cereal - into I've got a fair amount into me. Only then will I attempt protein. Asking my gut to handle protein first thing in the morning would cause it to throw a hissy fit.
I feel a little weird about referencing myself, but here's a post I wrote a while back that contains an analogy I find helpful in reminding myself to eat often and start my day with SF. Maybe it will make sense to you, too.
Have you considered trying the "Break The Cycle" diet? It might give your system a chance to level off and, since it's all SF, maybe you'll feel safer eating it.
HTH.
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[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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I've almost worn out the excitement of my morning soy protein-fruit-soymilk-metamucil smoothie. Almost!!
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Keep on keepin' on...
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Strange that you all seem to do so well with applesauce and soy- I don't feel like I can handle either of them! And my IBS isn't even super severe!
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