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Re: My secret
      07/13/04 12:50 PM
Wookie

Reged: 04/01/04
Posts: 247
Loc: n/a

When I was 6 years old, I was molested by my mom's boyfriend. He told me if I told my mom that he would kill her and I believed that. I will spare most details but I remember after he would molest me he would make me take a bath and then spank me while I was wet. I told myself that I would never tell unless I was asked because I wouln't lie. My mom and I lived with him out of state. I always hated him even before he did what he did to me. I think I just had to have sensed his evil because I didn't know what hate was at age 6. As a child, I was an excellent artist. I drew a picture of a poison bottle and a guy was drinking it. I took it to my mother and said isn't this pretty mommy? She said what is this Davina (that is my name-doe is my nickname). So I told her it was David (the man who molested me) dying. My mom was very disturbed and asked me who drew it, I said, I did. She almost couldn't believe it b/c the drawing looked as if an adult drew it. I vaguley remember drawing the picture. She packed up a suit case and we left for the airport. Unfortunatly, he met us at the pay phone and held a gun to my mom's side. We had to go back with him. After months later, we were successful at escaping. Once I was back home, I was caught playing 'nasty' with my neighbor friend. We were both the same age. I have great guilt today because of my actions. I am just getting to the point to realize I didn't know any better. Once we were caught, my grandma asked me if David ever touched me. I said yes. She told my mother. My mother pulled me in a room and told me to never lie like that again. I told her it was true and then she told me that I was lieing. We were living with my mom's little brother at this time. David found us and one night he crawled in our window. My mom called for my unlce and my uncle went ahead and pulled him inside the house and beat him with a bat. Then threw him out in the yard and called the police. Months later, he was still in a body like cast. My mom moved me around to several schools growing up. Once I ended up going to school with David's kids. They knew me and I knew them but we never acted as if we did. I don't know if they knew or what. I do know I just wanted to forget about all of it. When I was about 12 years old my mom said she had a question. She asked if that was actually true and I said yes. She broke down. Asked me what happened and I told her the specifics. She cried and cried and I comforted her. As a kid, I rarely cried and my mom often thought something was wrong with me. I think that is how I protected myself as a child. I had to be strong so I was! To this day I don't know where David is but I do know he even molested his own little girl. Sometimes I struggle with the pain and find myself trying to find him on the internet to see if he was ever caught. Or looking in the obituaries hoping that he died. A few months after I had came out and told my family, my grandma committed suicide. My mom and her weren't on good terms at that time. I sometimes have guilt that I was the reason. She did write a suicide letter and didn't mention it though. Her last sentence was, tell Davina she was my favorite. Okay, tears.. The End.

p.s. I am named after my mom's older brother David in case you were wondering.

--------------------
~Wookie

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Entire thread
* Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
Bevvy
07/12/04 09:11 AM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?

06/10/09 02:24 PM
* Best Post Ever (and love to the board old timers!)
Nelly
06/13/09 09:11 AM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
daliatree
01/23/05 05:32 PM
* Wow I missed this too

01/23/05 11:01 AM
* I just read this now, months later! How did I miss this thread?
Sara-Sage
01/23/05 08:12 AM
* Re: Not really a secret??
bttrfly08
07/14/04 12:11 PM
* Just Wanted To Say.....
Kimm
07/14/04 07:35 AM
* Ok it's taken me 3 days.....here goes
bz
07/14/04 06:53 AM
* Barbara!
Bevvy
07/14/04 07:51 AM
* Re: Barbara!
BL
07/14/04 08:13 AM
* Re: Ok it's taken me 3 days.....here goes
countrygirl
07/14/04 07:01 AM
* Barbara
jenX
07/14/04 06:57 AM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
Kristine
07/13/04 07:25 PM
* <<<<Here I am again with my thoughts>>>>
barbie
07/13/04 05:36 PM
* Re: Barbie
michele
07/14/04 10:42 AM
* Re: Michele and Barbie
Wookie
07/14/04 11:06 AM
* Michelle & Doe
barbie
07/14/04 12:10 PM
* Depression
peaches
07/14/04 11:55 AM
* Re: Peaches
Wookie
07/14/04 12:20 PM
* Re: Peaches
peaches
07/14/04 12:33 PM
* Re: Peaches
Wookie
07/14/04 01:03 PM
* Re: Peaches
peaches
07/14/04 01:21 PM
* Re: No problem at all!! -nt-
Wookie
07/14/04 01:23 PM
* Re: Depression
Sheri01
07/14/04 12:15 PM
* Re: Sheri01
Wookie
07/14/04 12:28 PM
* Anti-depressants
ChristineM
07/14/04 12:23 PM
* Re: ChristineM
Wookie
07/14/04 12:36 PM
* deep breathe...ok....
melitami
07/13/04 04:13 PM
* Melitami, thanks for sharing your story---nt--
BL
07/14/04 05:27 AM
* Bev..........
LittleLisa
07/13/04 03:50 PM
* LittleSis....
BL
07/14/04 05:29 AM
* Re:Beaglelover..
LittleLisa
07/14/04 05:35 PM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
Kimm
07/13/04 01:55 PM
* Kimm
BL
07/14/04 05:32 AM
* Kimm:
Sheri01
07/13/04 06:35 PM
* Re: WOW!
Wookie
07/13/04 02:26 PM
* Re: My secret
Wookie
07/13/04 12:50 PM
* Doe
BL
07/14/04 05:35 AM
* Re: Beaglelover
Wookie
07/14/04 06:56 AM
* Davina
Bevvy
07/13/04 03:37 PM
* Re: Bev
Wookie
07/14/04 06:43 AM
* Re: My secret
StephS
07/13/04 01:21 PM
* Re: Story cont. and forgiveness
Wookie
07/13/04 01:45 PM
* Doe
Sheri01
07/13/04 06:41 PM
* Re: Sheri01
Wookie
07/14/04 06:50 AM
* Re: My secret
chinagrl
07/13/04 12:53 PM
* Re: Surviving
Wookie
07/13/04 02:01 PM
* Re: My secret
michele
07/13/04 01:16 PM
* Re: Thanks so much for the kind words -nt-
Wookie
07/13/04 02:04 PM
* secret? What secret?
StephS
07/13/04 12:17 PM
* Re: Here is mine!
chinagrl
07/13/04 12:29 PM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
mspaschal259
07/13/04 12:04 PM
* Wow! Such a deep thread..
Jennifer Rose
07/13/04 12:00 PM
* Re: Wow! Such a deep thread..
atomic rose
07/13/04 12:18 PM
* Re: Wow! Such a deep thread..
Jennifer Rose
07/13/04 12:32 PM
* Re: Wow! Such a deep thread..
chinagrl
07/13/04 12:34 PM
* My turn (very long post!)
BL
07/13/04 11:42 AM
* beaglelover
Sheri01
07/13/04 06:51 PM
* Sheri01
BL
07/14/04 05:19 AM
* Thank You, BL
Bevvy
07/13/04 03:54 PM
* Re: Very good
Wookie
07/13/04 02:37 PM
* Doe
BL
07/14/04 05:22 AM
* Re: beaglelover
Wookie
07/14/04 07:00 AM
* Speechless!
bamagirl
07/13/04 12:04 PM
* for beaglelover
mspaschal259
07/13/04 11:53 AM
* Marilyn
BL
07/14/04 05:25 AM
* for beaglelover
mspaschal259
07/14/04 06:22 AM
* Marilyn
BL
07/14/04 06:36 AM
* Re: for beaglelover
BL
07/14/04 06:26 AM
* Re: for beaglelover
mspaschal259
07/14/04 06:37 AM
* Re: for beaglelover
BL
07/14/04 06:47 AM
* thank you for sharing this
jenX
07/13/04 11:51 AM
* biploar is something you are born with, is what i was told..
mspaschal259
07/13/04 11:55 AM
* I am amazed.......
BarbaraS
07/13/04 10:18 AM
* Wow...I'm at a loss for words right now....
Nugget
07/13/04 10:15 AM
* Re: Ditto! -nt-
Wookie
07/13/04 02:42 PM
* Strength and courage
Janey
07/13/04 03:09 AM
* Very well said, Janey......
Nugget
07/13/04 08:14 AM
* WOW!
JBI
07/12/04 10:36 PM
* Laura Sue....
StephS
07/12/04 10:15 PM
* Re: I spilled my guts, hit the shut down key and lost it all
gigi
07/12/04 11:08 PM
* Gigi
BL
07/14/04 05:40 AM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
Vicam
07/12/04 08:02 PM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
Shell Marr
07/13/04 08:07 AM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
RachelT
07/12/04 07:35 PM
* BEV, I'M WAITING....... -nt-
LauraSue
07/12/04 01:29 PM
* Whew! [Heavy Sigh]. Okay, Here Goes......
Bevvy
07/12/04 04:30 PM
* Bev.
BL
07/13/04 12:21 PM
* Re: Whew! [Heavy Sigh]. Okay, Here Goes......
michele
07/13/04 11:25 AM
* Bless You, Michele
Bevvy
07/13/04 11:30 AM
* Re: Bev you are a ROCK!
Wookie
07/13/04 10:31 AM
* WELL SAID, DOE! i couldn't find those words myself. perfection! -nt-
jenX
07/13/04 10:39 AM
* Re: Bevrs
michele
07/13/04 09:44 AM
* Re: Bevrs
BarbaraS
07/13/04 10:04 AM
* bbB
jenX
07/12/04 06:57 PM
* Bev and Laura Sue
Sheri01
07/12/04 06:52 PM
* Re: Whew! [Heavy Sigh]. Okay, Here Goes......
barbie
07/12/04 05:26 PM
* I'm so amazed by everyone
ChristineM
07/12/04 05:30 PM
* I want to echo that....
atomic rose
07/12/04 05:34 PM
* Re: Whew! [Heavy Sigh]. Okay, Here Goes......
LauraSue
07/12/04 05:05 PM
* Laura Sue.....
BL
07/14/04 05:44 AM
* Re: LauraSue
CathUK
07/13/04 11:28 AM
* Re: LauraSue
LauraSue
07/13/04 02:07 PM
* Re: LauraSue
CathUK
07/13/04 02:25 PM
* Re: LauraSue
lovejoy_22
07/13/04 02:20 PM
* Re: LS
michele
07/13/04 10:13 AM
* Re: Whew! [Heavy Sigh]. Okay, Here Goes......
barbie
07/12/04 06:39 PM
* Re: Whew! [Heavy Sigh]. Okay, Here Goes......
atomic rose
07/12/04 05:16 PM
* Re: Whew! [Heavy Sigh]. Okay, Here Goes......
chinagrl
07/12/04 05:23 PM
* WOW *exhale*
peaches
07/12/04 01:40 PM
* LS, in Bevrs' defense....
jenX
07/12/04 01:39 PM
* Re: LS, in Bevrs' defense....
LauraSue
07/12/04 03:46 PM
* Laura, you brave girl, you!
jenX
07/12/04 07:01 PM
* Yeah, What Jen Said
Bevvy
07/12/04 08:37 PM
* Bev
ChristineM
07/12/04 08:40 PM
* AIS
Bevvy
07/12/04 09:09 PM
* Bev, you are a sweetheart!
crampgirl
07/13/04 10:18 AM
* Fascinating!
ChristineM
07/12/04 09:47 PM
* Thanks Christine and Jenny
Bevvy
07/12/04 10:18 PM
* OH BEV!!
RachelT
07/13/04 01:43 PM
* Thanks Becky -- nt
Bevvy
07/13/04 03:50 PM
* Just my 2 cents
bamagirl
07/13/04 11:21 AM
* Re: BEV-You did nothing to deserve what you got
Wookie
07/13/04 11:02 AM
* cut it out- you're making me all choked up, dude. -nt-
jenX
07/13/04 11:03 AM
* Re: Me sorry JenX
Wookie
07/14/04 07:06 AM
* Bev!
peaches
07/12/04 10:56 PM
* Jessica
Bevvy
07/13/04 08:25 AM
* Re: Jessica
peaches
07/13/04 10:26 PM
* Wow Bev...
StephS
07/12/04 10:13 PM
* Steph
Bevvy
07/12/04 10:23 PM
* Steph.....
Dr. Spice Yamin
07/13/04 08:28 PM
* Re: Steph.....
StephS
07/13/04 10:27 PM
* Re: Steph.....
Dr. Spice Yamin
07/14/04 07:37 AM
* Re: Steph.....
StephS
07/14/04 07:48 AM
* Re: AIS
chinagrl
07/12/04 09:21 PM
* Re: LS, in Bevrs' defense....
chinagrl
07/12/04 04:18 PM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
LauraSue
07/12/04 12:32 PM
* wow Jen!
StephS
07/12/04 12:16 PM
* Re: wow Jen!
michele
07/13/04 10:20 AM
* BEV and the rest of y'all
ChristineM
07/12/04 11:01 AM
* Eeeeeek...
atomic rose
07/12/04 10:47 AM
* Casey, Casey, Casey...
jenX
07/12/04 10:52 AM
* LOL!!
atomic rose
07/12/04 11:06 AM
* Don't *DELETED*
ChristineM
07/12/04 10:36 AM
* ok, well... *DELETED*
jenX
07/12/04 10:46 AM
* LOL *DELETED*
ChristineM
07/12/04 10:51 AM
* Re: Don't stand so, don't stand so...
chinagrl
07/12/04 10:42 AM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
Sheri01
07/12/04 10:34 AM
* Sheri01
BL
07/14/04 05:50 AM
* Re: Sheri, Thanks for sharing your story
gigi
07/12/04 11:30 AM
* Congratulations, Sheri!
Bevvy
07/12/04 10:47 AM
* Re: Congratulations, Sheri!
Sheri01
07/12/04 11:49 AM
* Sheri01
jenX
07/12/04 10:41 AM
* Thanks! -nt-
Sheri01
07/12/04 10:42 AM
* I've actually never told this to anyone in real life..
Stephie
07/12/04 09:30 AM
* Steph....
BL
07/14/04 05:52 AM
* but was it GOOD!?!?!! -nt-
jenX
07/12/04 07:05 PM
* Stephie's been a bad girl!
Sheri01
07/12/04 06:55 PM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
LauraSue
07/12/04 09:13 AM
* Nope, LS
Bevvy
07/12/04 09:58 AM
* Re: Nope, LS
TommyNY
07/12/04 12:21 PM
* tommy,
jenX
07/12/04 12:43 PM
* Re: tommy,
TommyNY
07/12/04 01:07 PM
* Re: tommy,
Sheri01
07/12/04 01:27 PM
* some people did, Bevrs.
jenX
07/12/04 10:10 AM
* wow Jen...as an adoptive mom
####
07/12/04 03:31 PM
* Re: some people did, Bevrs.
countrygirl
07/12/04 10:20 AM
* BLESS YOU, Jen!
Bevvy
07/12/04 10:18 AM
* Re: Jen, you are more than a Woman !
gigi
07/12/04 11:37 AM
* no, YOU'RE a gem, ya big dope.
jenX
07/12/04 10:19 AM
* Wow Jen, you win! -nt-
Stephie
07/12/04 10:15 AM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
countrygirl
07/12/04 09:20 AM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
chinagrl
07/12/04 10:37 AM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
Sheri01
07/12/04 12:02 PM
* Re: Your Deepest, Darkest Secret?
chinagrl
07/12/04 12:59 PM
* Good For You, ChinaGirl
Bevvy
07/12/04 10:50 AM
* ah, childhood memories!
jenX
07/12/04 10:50 AM
* Re: my secret
michele
07/12/04 11:33 AM
* michele,
jenX
07/12/04 12:00 PM
* Re: my secret
atomic rose
07/12/04 11:59 AM
* Re: my secret
Sheri01
07/12/04 11:53 AM
* Re: To everyone!
michele
07/13/04 10:16 AM

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