Irritable Bowel Syndrome Message Boards

Nelly, Your post made me so sad for what you're going through! I don't know if I should attempt any advice at all, but I'll just tell you my first reaction and hopefully that's okay. Unfortunately I don't think its always possible to get some kind of "closure" whatever that means when people die. I know its not the same but I lost a grandparent without resolving issues that kept us from speaking for 20 years. In the end I tried a bit and confirmed that he was someone I could not find any way to be close to. I hope you don't discourage your bf from trying though - maybe he should try if only so that his regrets will be for his mom's failings and not for his own missed opportunities? I think you could definitely let him know that you're worried for him to get hurt by the attempt without telling him not to do it. Or if you already told him that he shouldn't, (which I completely understand your reaction btw) I would consider easing up and tell him you're concerned for him while giving him room to figure out if he really wants to reconnect to someone who was so toxic in his life. Hope you get some sleep tonight...

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Ladies & gentlemen take my advice, pull down your pants and slide on the ice.

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