Really interesting question Ashley. Like you I've seen so many of my friends get into these ridiculous and damaging cyles of jealousy and have relationships totally fall apart because of it. I think that's just so sad.
In love/sex relationships I think communication is just sooo important. If you're jealous - talk about it. Why do you think you're jealous in this situation? Talking it out like this really gets to the root of the problem, which is usually a problem somewhere else in the relationship. The jealously is just like the symptom.
Personally, with my partner A, we are more or less polyamourous, which means that have secondary relationships (personal and sexual) with other people. Obviously jealousy is going to come into play quite a bit in this kind of relationship. I am not a jealous person by nature and I rarely have problems with jealousy. I think this makes me pretty lucky. Just the same, we are always talking to each other about how the other feels, if the other is jealous etc. to make sure that everyone feels safe and trusting and happy. We have a fantastic, loving, solid relationship. We've been together 3 years now, monogamous for about the first year of that.
The way I see it, jealousy - to varying degrees - is something everyone feels at some point, especially in relationships with other people. Acknowledging that feeling and finding out why it's happening has been really key for me though. Otherwise you just get into scary cycles of guilt and manipulation, which I've definitely seen happen to my friends.
Phew! OK /steps off soapbox/ 
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Re: Question about jealousy.......
