I'm So Sorry, Gigi
05/19/04 04:35 PM
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Bevvy
Reged: 11/04/03
Posts: 5918
Loc: Northwest Washington State
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Gigi, I understand about in-laws. Mine are dead now, and have been for a very long time, and I miss them, despite the fact that my father-in-law resented me, having taken away his only son. It's a difficult situation for everyone. But it's really tough when they leave us forever.
I had a horrible mother. I won't go into details here, but suffice it to say I was determined my husband would never be subjected to her -- and I kept that promise. My mother and I have been estranged for over 40 years now (I don't even know if she's still alive).
I have a wonderful marriage, a very dear husband who is my best friend. He sounds a lot like yours. Let your husband take over the care of his mother from now on. You need to take care of YOU. Having IBS is bad enough, you certainly don't need any other stress in your life, and you're not going to change the MIL, so that situation will always remain status quo.
You'll be amazed at how your letting go of the situation with her will lighten up your load, both mentally AND physically. It will also help you to listen to your hubby when he comes to you with his stressful stories about his own mother, and allow you to look at it objectively and offer him some positive suggestions (while staying out of it entirely).
Good luck, Bev
-------------------- <img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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