Hmmm, well, I drink milk all the time. It does not bother me as long as it is fat free. If it has some fat, it bothers me... not sure why, but it seems like milk fat (butter) is more of a trigger than other kinds of fat... or maybe I just tend to use more than other kinds of fat? I am unsure...
Anyway, I am not lactose intollerant as per my doctor (who also has IBS) and she said if it's FF it should be fine.
Also, there seems to be no research confirming that cassein/whey are bothersome for IBSers (or others, excluding those with dairy alergies, I mean)
Thus, I think the whole dairy avoidance craze is a little overinflated. Yes, it needs to be FF. It would also help if it's lactose free just to make sure... But the rest? Everyone claims it with such certainty and that claim seems to only be based on anecdotal evidence... meaning the data is questionable. Forgive me, but I'm a mathematician, I deal with data all the time and I try to apply the same rigor to my IBS as I do to my studies, when time permits. I do not consider the claim that dairy (when FF and lactose free) should be avoided at all times a correct statement. I think that's just another one of the personal things...
That being said, it could be that you are bothered with dairy. I was scared to add it to my diet too... If it wasn't for my doctor, I would probably not have added it back... although I used to be addicted to it.
What I did: I started with some Bulgarian or Greek feta cheese (goat cheese) to see whether I can do well with that and I did OK. Then I switched to sheep, still OK. Sheeps cheese is high in fat, so I was making sure I don't eat as much as I would eat in the past. I knew that cows milk is worse than those two, but I didn't know where to buy cows milk feta cheese (not in the states, I mean) so, I just added it to some cold cereal, and I tend to just soak the cereal and then eat it and throw away the remaining milk (it's gross to me). Very little milk... gradually increased...
Now that I am stabilized, I eat my morning oatmeal with milk. I am usually OK (excluding yesterday, when I tried steel cut oats and they seem to have been the problem). Since I can tollerate it first thing in the morning, I consider it a safe food. I did not go back to the same amounts of milk products I used to eat before (and processed cheeses are a problem for me anyway), but I don't avoid it. The reason I didn't go back to the old amounts, though, is that I started eating more things that are more healthy and more yummy so I don't need to fill myself up with cheese any more, LOL.
It is very dangerous, though, if you do it too fast. You could not be sensitive to dairy, but since you haven't had it for so long, it could shock your system if you tried it like a whole glas at a time. I'd try a smaller amount. And then up it a little. Or try some goat milk products (goat milk is gentler) and sheep milk products (still gentler than cows) first.
Let me know if I missed something. I don't want to argue with people over this, because I know dairy avoidance is a religeous issue on this board, and I don't have time for lengthy discussions. I did it for quite a while too (avoiding dairy) so I know how scary it seems at first. Our bodies seem to be so much more complicated than we know so we are scared to not add something that could harm them even if the probability is low. However, if you consider the other alternatives, it seems you might be better off forgetting about dairy alternatives completely, unless you only drink almond milk (soy - controversial, probably harmful; rice milk - bad for C; oat milk - tastes gross at least to me)... We do not have enough data (and probably won't have in our lifetimes) so we either need to try things out, or stay safe and not try anything.
Last note: You are stable, right? If you are still not stable, though, don't do this, because you won't know if dairy bothers you...
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