I Cried Yet Again.....
#10001 - 05/26/03 05:36 PM
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Well today I cried for probaly the third time in my life. My dad was giving me the "You gotta start eating other foods" speech again and basically told me that if i dont gain some major weight, hes gonna be terribly dissapointed in me. All this pressure was just bottling inside me, but i was able to hold it back until my mom announced that she was making hot dogs and hamburgers for dinner. I told her that I didnt want to eat eathier and then she sided with my dad and goes "I dont know what you eat anymore, angela,your diet is SO limited" I then felt the tears coming and I just bolted for my room, locked the door and grabbed my bible. Luckily through faith I was able to calm down and find some comfort. Anyway, my mom came to ask me what i wanted for dinner and saw that i was upset. She then went upstairs and made me some fish. At dinner, i found the fish that she made was flooded with butter and garlic. I cringed and dug into my potato. My dad kept on insisting that i should put butter on it, but i refused. THe looks they gave me while i slowly ate were too frightening to explain. I felt like some freak on a side show while the audience stared and watched me chew. My mom then asked me if i was okay, and i told her that Ive been having daily D attacks since friday and now shes convinced i have crohns. I dunno... its a possibility, i just dont know. I sure I hope I find out whats going on with me once and for all!
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-Angela
Healed in Jesus' Name 
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Angela - I am so sorry you have to go through this. I wish there were something, ANYTHING, I could do for you, but I am at a complete loss. I thought you and your mom were getting along better and she was starting to understand more? Well, at least only 3 more days to the appt. I can't wait! Please let us know as soon as you're done. I can't wait to hear what happens. I'll be thinking of you. 
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now i'm new around the board so i don't know your background.. so bare with me ...
but when will others learn that stress is the worst thing a syndrome like this needs.. so they are simply making you worse by making you feel this way.. I'm sorry you are in that situation, but sometimes people just have a hard time dealing with something that they themselves aren't going through.
I wish people would learn that sometimes it's better to not talk but to listen.. maybe they'd learn that hotdogs and hamburgers aren't a "good" idea for anybody really IBS or not.
Luckily there is a place like these forums where you can get advise that truely understand what you are going through.
For me Heather's book was the best tool I've ever had, finally after suffering from the "unknown" since I was about 8 years old.. I know have something to go with.. and also I can hand the book to others and let them read what I go through with every meal, and the reaction is more of amazement than anything else.
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trying to equal the IBS ratio- one man at a time
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I'm sorry that you are feeling bad. Please let us know what happens at the doctor, maybe he/she will be able to help you out. Have you tried explaining to your mom/dad that you have stomach problems?
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I've never spoken with you before but I had to respond... I know how hard it is to get family to truly understand this illness. Its so frustrating because they're only trying to be helpful but they don't "get" how painful it can be for us. Even the good days are often times uncomfortable.
From the way you explained it they do seem very caring. Have either of them spoken with your doctors with you to try to better understand the illness? Maybe you could print up some articles about how important it is to not eat foods that are triggers.
I hope you get some answers at your appt. Good Luck....
Cora
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Hi Concrete Angel
I am so sorry that your family doesn't understand. Like coragrace03 mentioned that printing some articles up on it sounds like a great idea, maybe they will understand.
I will be praying for you and your parents that God will give you strength to go through this.
Georgette
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Angela,
I feel for you so much, it must be so hard for you to deal with even without support. I don't really know how best to advise you to deal with your parents, I'm 28 and I still get wound up by my mum trying to tell me what to do and how to do it! At least she is a bit more understanding about food, although at the weekend BBQ I was made a real pariah by being asked in front of everyone "is it ok if I put butter on the potatoes or do we have to do without?" !!
At least you know we are all here rooting for you, and if you get a sympathetic doctor for your tests who understands the diet, perhaps you could ask them to tell your parents that you MUST eat this way.
And failing that, in a few years you'll be able to feed yourself - there is always hope in the future
Much love
Sarah 
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Sarah
Looking for inspiration...
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Poor Angel!!!
It's so sad for you (though I know you've got the strength, the wits and the sense of humour to sort this out, I'm 100% sure) but in some ways your situation is incredibly ironic - there are so many people at least here in Europe who worry endlessly about their children eating TOO MUCH junk food ('come on, can't you have some wholemeal bread and fruit instead of these terrible hamburgers all the time'), and there's your parents worrying that you DON't eat them! Can't you trick them into a course on healthy eating (give it to them as a birthday present or so??). The last thing you need is having to battle about a bit of butter on your potato!
Good luck for your appointment!
Susaloh
Edited by susaloh (05/27/03 01:00 AM)
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Hey everybody, I just wanted to take a minute and thank you all for all your wonderful support, it really means alot to me! Mags, yes, i thought that my mom was beginning to understand too, but I guess that went down the drain.
Susaloh- Ive tried to trick my dad into a diet plan, and he actually did well for a while there, but then bounced right back to junk food and mcdonalds heaven! I feel so lost sometimes but I know that everything will be alright. Thank You guys again! My only situation now is dinner tonight-Baked Macaroni and Cheese!!!!  Lets hope for the best...
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-Angela
Healed in Jesus' Name
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You poor thing! Oh, you are such a sweetie and it's terrible to hear of the problems you are encountering. It is clear that your parents are confusing 2 problems here. They are worried about your weight - and that's all they can see. Perhaps they are finding it difficult to come to the realisation that it's the type of food that is causing the issue - not the amount of food that is the problem. Maybe I"m taking a stab in the dark here, but could you try to explain that you could increase your intake if it was the right kind of food that didn't make you sick? Maybe then they see a solution to the problem they see (ie not eating) and you get the benefit of eating food that suits you???
Anyway, I hope you'll be ok... let us know...
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