uhh
#340002 - 12/24/08 08:28 PM
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So my mom ordered dominos pizza and breadsticks, I kept resisting the urge,gave in and ate a piece and like 3 breadsticks after I so badly wanted to follow the ibs diet..I had made spagetti noodles with some frozen vegtables,shrimp,smart balance,and some mrs.dash...
So I go to work to find out the manager was trying to call me all day to tell me not to come in as I worked at 5 and the store closed at 5. Well I show up and could already tell it was dramaville and alot of the co workers were angry and pissy..I was thinking oh well I'll be out of here in half an hour because the manager tells me to just clean the fry hopper and go home..well t hen I'm annoyed cuz she didn't want me to show up in the first place..and now I don't have a ride home because my mom said I have to have my own ride home and then I wondered what was wrong with the phone since I was home all day..and it worked a little before 1. Then I find a ride from a coworker who tells the manager shes driving me home and coming back.. So then the manager says I can stay and help till all the cleaning and such is done,if I want to get a ride home..I said no,I don't want to..she tells me she's giving me a bad write up if I don't stay..I was aggrevated by then,So I told her that since she didn't want me there in the first place and she already told me I could clean the machine and go home,that I would be leaving anyway and would talk to upper managemnt about what she said if she wrote me up. Luckily after over an hour I was allowed to catch a ride with a guy who was off work that showed up for something and was allowed to leave.
Well I get home and think I ate quite enough food for today..After a while I eat a handful of white chocolate,a small glass of wine AND A PIECE OF PIZZA! Does anyone happen to know if the crust is mostly SF of dominos? uhh..so then I go and take about 6 tablets of fibercon spread out within 2 hours.
THen I started thinking,god I have to get a hold of myself..So I search and search for my ibs audio tapes and only find one stored in a paper folder..So I'm ordering the whole program right now cuz I have a ton of cleaning and organizing to do tommorow,as I am only home with my mom tommorow,and don't go out of town do to my ibs and being around all the food at my relatives,and most of all,theres alot of ppl there I don't want to see..
I need help..I feel overwhelmed and I'm having dinner with my bf and his family on the 28th..at a restarant..and I guess I just won't eat much..I absolutly am not telling his family about my ibs..as I will tell my bf sometime soon and ask him to keep it a secret,I know he will. I'm most comfortable with keeping it a secret.
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I hardly slept because I felt bloated and like a dull ache and kind of burning feeling. I tried for hours to sleep but bloating kept me up...my christmass isn't too good,because my mom wouldn't stop screaming at my cat now I have to find a new home for it before she gives it away,I'm really sad,I'm so attached to it and its the only pet I'm "allowed" to have. My mom's smoker's cough is driving me nuts,she was on the patches and comented how well her cravings were going away..then she does the usual and says retarded crap like, I pray for cancer. Only because her ex made her angry. Her coughing even wakes ppl up at night. Her patches were next to her on the counter with scissors and I was like hey I can open one and put it on u,she screamed at me to leave her alone and shes been a depressed raving bitch...on top of that I feel terrible and have a ton of stuff to do today...and am irritable and tired of everyone.
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I'm sorry that your holiday wasn't better.
Are you old enough and financially secure enough to move out on your own? Maybe share an apartment with a friend?
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Saul (IBS - D)
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I am 21,but absolutly not financially secure..I couldn't bring myself to share an apartment,I can't live in a place with only 1 bathroom...Well my bf wants an apartment eventually,but if he leaves his mom's he will have no insurance..when he's 24,hes 21 now..the insurance goes away. I'm guess years from now,it would be possible to move out.. I wonder why I felt so bad last night? maybe its acidic foods or something,trapped hot burning gas?
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Obviously it COULD have been something you ate last night that didn't agree with you. Maybe the pizza?
I'm new here and have read only your most recent posts but it seems to me that stress at home could be a factor as well as any diet issues.
Are you able to get any professional help? Maybe a clinic or some counselling service? It could never hurt to talk to someone about what is bothering you.
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Saul (IBS - D)
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Well i think I know why you have Ibs.....holy stressville.
How old are you? Resist temptation!!!! Eat super safe. With all that stress you need to eat safe foods. That way you won't have as much to deal with.
Good luck!
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IBS-D since 1999...mostly stable..i do cheat too.Bad me.
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Well im my post,I said I was 21..Yea I didn't resist the temptation again..I ate a bunch of wal mart pumkin pie,i know i know..and my dad brought home alot of candy relatives gave us,I ate 3 dove chocolates and christmas tree shaped pretzles that had a frosting and green and red sprinkles.. I feel as if I don't care or have any will to get better,but I want to stick to the diet really bad and just blow it everyday. maybe its being slightly depressed?
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Quote:
I feel as if I don't care or have any will to get better,but I want to stick to the diet really bad and just blow it everyday. maybe its being slightly depressed?
This is a hard time of year for many of us. The holidays are often difficult enough (thinking that you HAVE TO have a good time but deep down inside you just don't feel it). Add to that all the extra food that is eaten... between holiday meals, a primal urge to eat carbs during the winter, etc.
Depression usually peaks at this time of year. Again, I suggest trying to find some professional help. If you don't have health insurance try to find a clinic. Just having it in your mind that there IS a way to overcome these issues will take you into a better place.
Good luck and DON'T GIVE UP!
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Saul (IBS - D)
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I don't quite think I need a professional. Plus the only place I make myself be at is work because I have to work and can't afford to get fired.making appointments or finding rides to places doesn't work for me,except when I need to go to work,or sometimes wal mart..other than that people complain and won't take me places..It was hard enough just trying to get to a lip piercing appointment,cuz I had to hide it from my parents and figure out my bf and my schedule so he could take me.
yes I want to drive but not able to work enough hours cuz of ibs and I have ibs supplemnt expenses,grocery expenses and a few more things.. I know there is a way.I just purchased the ibs audio program yesterday,if u remember what I said in my Uhh post.
I need to re invent myself to when I was most happy..Well when I had summer school pe I was riding bike and doing sports,I think it was 6 hours a day. I was super fit and ppl noticed! That was a time when I didn't have ibs..there was a time when I was very strict with my ibs diet..So I could focus on health,fitness,and my video games..cleaning and organizing my room,read a book...I guess I obsess on what I can't have and what I can't do such as save much money or move out.. and then I just keep doing the same things over everyday and never change..
I should be working on being less of a slob..I left a bowl of food under my computer desk,and everyday I'm picking up dishes that pile up..I'm a pretty careless person.Forgetful too...
I guess I could write a list of things to fucus on and print it out,oh there's this handheld voice recorder thing I want..I could play it everytime I'm about to eat bad food or be a slob,ect..I would say something like"remember how you feel after you eat the good tasting bad food?"remember wanting to improve your ibs but never breaking the bad habits?"
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oh my
#340014 - 12/25/08 06:39 PM
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So forgetful,I do't even know what I did with a card that had $20 in it,i opened a day or 2 ago..Even sat down peaceful to see if it came to me,it hasn't! well I just found the card with the money in it, remember I was going to bed and set it on a chair in the bedroom,oops.
Edited by aperson (12/25/08 06:46 PM)
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