Sara -
I'll be honest, I haven't read every bit of your story, but it reminds me of a time way back. I had two crushes at the time, one of them who showed some interest in return and the other who declared she only liked girls (this was high school, by the way, but I think it still pertains because we were mature for our age). Anyways, the second one took an immediate liking to me because I "calmed her down." She was continually depressed because she came out of the closet to a girl she thought had mutual feelings, but then, after she came out, wanted nothing to do with her - even as a friend. So, needless to say, she took it very hard.
Over the next few months we got closer and closer. We would go to stores and talk about which women were the cutest. We both agreed cuteness was better than hotness.  When it came time for school dances and stuff like that, she always invited me.
I always had in the back of my mind, "If only she weren't gay...", but of course I never in a million years thought anything would come of it.
One day she started hinting around the subject of kissing me, just to see how she felt. I told her that I was OK with it, even though in reality it was something I only dreamt of, something I was much more than simply "OK" with. She even made a date for us where we would act like a normal straight couple and get dinner and a movie or something. At this point, we were so comfortable with each other we could have acted married and it would have seemed natural.
But when the date approached, she started getting second thoughts. Even just the kiss, even if it were a peck, didn't seem like as good of an idea. She just wanted the experience to say she had the experience and knew it, she knew she wouldn't become attracted to guys on the spot, sh just knew, deep inside her. So she realized that she would have been using me and came out with it. She said it wouldn't fit who she truly knew she was and would only accomplish using me. So, we left it at that and continued with our very close relationship.
My point is, maybe he is thinking to himself that the experience would be something, but at the same time he knows it just wouldn't work. He seems less sure of himself than my friend was - maybe it's just a matter of time before he realizes nothing will happen, and only then can he tell you the same.
If this helped, awesome, though I don't know the full story so maybe I'm being counter-productive...
- Bill
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